Lucky and Interesting Life

Shouldn't life be like a movie?

2008-01-25T14:32:00.000-05:00

My friend so much has happened in the last 30 days, I wouldn't know where to begin.

While I work out my thoughts and try to put pen to paper, here's an interesting 'Top Ten' that just came out today! Like most Top Ten's, I personally only agree with a few of them, can you guess which ones?

CNN's 'The Screening Room's Top 10 Romantic Moments'

1. Casablanca (Michael Curtiz, 1942)
Yep, it's a no-brainer.

In a world full of slushy, happily-ever-after rom-coms, Bogie and Bergman find true romance in heartache, sacrificing their romance for the greater good. Bogie's "hill of beans" speech still gets us every time.

Oh, the tragedy! Still, they'll always have Paris ...

2. City Lights (Charles Chaplin, 1931)
Truly, madly sweetly: Blind flower-girl Virginia Cherrill recognizes Chaplin's tramp when she presses a coin into his hand.

Deeply moved, as the scale of his sacrifice dawns on her, she wells up -- as did we; his expression shifts from shame to tentative delight. The most touching film moment of all time?

3. Roman Holiday (William Wyler, 1953)
Audrey Hepburn's princess falls for Gregory Peck's noble hack (surely that's an oxymoron!) -- but while the ending is bittersweet, it's the playful scene at the Mouth of Truth, with its pitch-perfect comic timing, that captured our hearts.

4. From Here to Eternity (Fred Zinnemann, 1953)
"Nobody ever kissed me the way you do." Army sergeant Burt Lancaster and troubled wife Deborah Kerr find refuge in their torrid, adulterous affair; the heat between them is tangible.

With the tumultuous waves crashing over the embracing couple, Zinnemann creates one of old Hollywood's most iconic images.

5. Amélie (Jean-Pierre Jeunet, 2001)
A sheer moment of joy, as Amélie (Audrey Tautou) zooms through Paris on the back of Nino's (Mathieu Kassovitz) bicycle. The laughing couple freewheel down the cobbled streets past Sacré Coeur, filled with the delirious exuberance of new love. Ah, c'est l'amour.

6. Annie Hall (Woody Allen, 1977)
The highlight of Woody Allen's confessional masterpiece is Annie's (Diane Keaton) first meeting with Alvy (Allen) at the tennis club where we're blown away by her vitality, ebullient charm and fresh contrast with Allen's wound-up, navel-gazing New Yorker. La-di-da, la-di-da, la la!

7. La Dolce Vita (Federico Fellini, 1960)
Fellini's beautifully choreographed tableau in the Trevi Fountain sees young journalist Marcello (Marcello Mastroianni) rendered helpless as buxom screen goddess Sylvia (Anita Eckberg) draws him into her spell. A paean to those fleeting moments between sunset and dawn when reality slips away to reveal something altogether more magical. Talking of which ...

8. Before Sunrise (Richard Linklater, 1995)
They've no time for mix-tapes, so Celine (Julie Delpy) and Jesse (Ethan Hawke) head to a record store's music booth to acid-test their compatibility. In its confined space, they nervously avoid each other's eyes, so painfully aware of each other's physical presence. A moment that evokes strong memories of those sweet first-love connections.

9. Lost in Translation (Sofia Coppola, 2003)
Bob (Bill Murray), a movie star well past his sell-by date, and Charlotte (Scarlett Johansson), a neglected newlywed, are two lost souls who are cast adrift, and come together, in Tokyo. Their parting moment, when Bob whispers his secret farewell to Charlotte, is all the more romantic for its mystery.

10. When Harry Met Sally (Rob Reiner, 1989)
Forget the orgasm scene in Katz's Deli. Forget the strolls in scenic Central Park. After ninety minutes of vacillating, Harry and Sally have one final bout of verbal sparring before they finally get it together for good. Now that's what we call New Year fireworks.

And our most cringe-worthy moments...

Four Weddings and a Funeral (Mike Newell, 1994)
Out of the frying pan, into the fire: Hugh Grant escapes Bridezilla to pour his heart out to Andie MacDowell, who utters her painfully corn-dog response: "Is it still raining? I hadn't noticed." You could have had Kristin Scott Thomas, you dolt!

Howard the Duck (Willard Huyck, 1986)
Please, no! Down in B-movie hell, we hid our eyes and winced as lovely Lea Thompson attempted to seduce a rather startled duck-shaped alien. There should be laws against that sort of thing. Wait a minute, there ARE laws against that sort of thing!

The English Patient (Anthony Mingella, 1996)"
I've watched you - on verandahs, at garden parties, at the races ... " Ralph Fiennes turns stalker in Mingella's improbable mush-fest. And don't even start us on the bit where he runs across the desert. As Seinfeld's Elaine says, "Quit telling your stupid story about the stupid desert and just die already! Die!"

Titanic (James Cameron, 1997)
Timeless romance? We think not. As Leo slips away, Kate Winslet's star-crossed lover cries, "I'll never let go, Jack. I promise." And then does -- scurrying as quickly as her hands will paddle her to the safety of a lifeboat, a warm blanket and a nice cup of tea. Ah, the relief.

Star Wars: Episode II -- Attack of the Clones (George Lucas, 2002)
"I've been dying a little bit each day since you came back into my life." Any scene featuring Hayden Christensen's moody teen has us wincing, but he's most awkwardly shown up against Natalie Portman, who struggles nobly through Lucas' plodding love-lines. Georgie, please, leave out the romance. We're begging you.

The White Rabbit of dating (cont.)

2007-12-20T16:12:00.000-05:00

This is the second part of an ongoing night where I managed to squeeze three dates into an afternoon and evening. Admittedly, the (cont.) in the blog’s title may’ve given that away, but I’ve never been one to assume the obvious. If you haven’t read it and would like too, it can be found here.

It had been weeks since I had the chance to ride my motorcycle, and the evening of dates seemed the perfect opportunity to take it out for a spin. The weather was looking nice and none of the women stirred a passion for extra effort to be made on the date. Why would I bother to go out then? Well, if weren’t for the small window of opportunity to meet them, I’d let the following days of phone calls to screen the various contestants of the future Mrs. Luckiest Guy.

After all, this is what the all the efforts were for, to find that one person I’d sit on the park bench with at the grand old age of seventy two.

Although I was casually pursuing the women tonight with a polite amount of interest, I respected the dates enough to wear a nice shirt, jeans and relatively nice shoes.

As I mentioned in the last blog entry, Miss PP’s friend had taken so long to drag her out of the house, I was already running late for what supposed to be dates two and three. The first date with DD played through my head on the ride out to contestant number two. Was there an interest. If there was an attraction would the difference in our incomes change her feelings? Did she my nice, but not expensive car as we left? These questions and more bounced around as I rode down the highway to meet date number two at a sushi restaurant.

If I tell you there’s no point to assigning number two a name it might kill the suspense, but that would imply some kind of build-up and certainly over-state the situation. As mentioned before, I’d seen this young lady on the various dating sites over the years I’d been bopping around in cyberspace. Sure she looked close enough to the photos, but as suspected they were older pictures. Consequently, there was no surprise by the lines around her eyes and mouth. Actually, I have no problem with these aging lines on women. Someone near and dear nicknamed them smiling lines long ago and I’ve always cheerfully agreed. Now, women who do scare me are the ones who should have smiling lines, but don’t. This leads me to think either they’ve had work done, which implies high maintenance and no man in his right mind would knowingly buy into that.

Or, what if they’ve avoided those laughing lines from never smiling? This has happened and will come up very soon in the ongoing adventures of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it

The other alternative is they’ve managed to fight the specter of aging, but let’s be honest (and pardon the pun) it’s only a matter of time. Like a dark comedy sketch, I could only imagine going to bed with a hot looking forty five year old and waking up with someone who’s looks have collapsed into a sixty two year old lady!

Laugh if you will, but it’s a strong possibility.

I’ve been told I look younger than I actually am, but know I’ve aged. Every wrinkle on my face and each smiling line came from so many great times that brought even more memories and I wouldn’t change one of them. I extend this same courtesy and expectations to my dates. Besides, do I want to look like a dirty old man with a young thing on my arm?

It could also be that my ex-wife was so conscience about how young she thought she looked, constantly asking strangers to ask her eye became an embarrassing eye-rolling experience, permanently shying me away from women of that age-defying (whether it really was or not) ilk.

As I said, the wrinkles were fine. Wasn’t too impressed with her top that looked like it came from the adult line of Giranimals. Not that I want something Jennifer Lopez proportions, but I do prefer women with a curvaceous derriere and the hips to match. She had the hips but the butt was flatter than an endless desert. Not good.

Conversation was nice, but nothing sparkling to make up for the dayschool shirt nor the old world geography. As mentioned before in this blog, I’ve been blessed with an intuition about people, whether they’re of good or bad character, lying or telling the truth and in this case, what they really want. It became apparent to me that she was at a place in her life that between her job and daughter, she only had the time or would be quite happy with a friend with benefits arrangement.

Keeping a close watch on the time without being too rude, I did something I’ve never done on a date before. Asked for the check early on to ensure I was paid and ready to leave dead on the hour we agreed the meet and greet would take. Even with that little time, I was still cutting it to close to make it to the final date of the night.

We promised to chat on the phone and get together when we both had more time, but as I rode away mental notes were made to always trust the instincts and rather than waste money and time on hopeful excursions, just be upfront about the doubts. Of course its easier to write this, just as easy to think I’ll do it, but there is honestly no way to carry the resolution out when cornered about setting up a time to get together on the phone.

It wasn’t long before traffic and sheer distance threw me behind schedule. The huge disadvantage of riding rather than driving is not being able to call while traveling. You know those long lights you curse as a driver? When riding and needing time to make a quick call, they’re a blessing. Although it wasn’t the longest of lights, I came across one that was long enough to let her know I was ten minutes away and promptly hang up when the light went green.

Because I had mixed feelings about her, there wasn’t too much guilt about the abrupt phone call and managed to get to the bar quicker than I’d originally thought. Sure it was later than planned, but certainly better than promised in the last call.

Bear in mind one of her pet peeves were guys who couldn’t have interesting funny conversations. This has never been a problem with me, with most people commenting I’m a little too friendly and outgoing to not only the people in my group but also the bar-staff, waitresses, etc.

She was certainly beautiful and more endowed than her picture had shown. There was absolutely no anger or temper about the tardiness, but the body language was that of disinterest. That in itself isn’t a bad thing. There have been dates with folded arms, wandering eyes and bored fidgeting. What wasn’t impressive was slouching and general posture more suited to a frat house rather than the upscale bar we had decided to meet in.

A great conversation is like a dance. Sure you can waltz through one, but don’t expect any passion or thrills. No, for a flirty exchange the tango is more the pace to get the chemistry clicking. A waltz is slower with no need for either a lead or to follow, but the tango is fast paced and intimate, requiring full attention to your partner staying in time and in tune at every step.

Needles to say, we didn’t even get on the dance floor. Oh, I asked to dance and even tried to get the orchestra to take the tempo more upbeat, but my potential dance partner sat sunken in her leather barstool. If it were any consolation, the bartender was flirting with me and catching my eye everytime I looked around the bar for inspiration.

Maybe it had been too long of day? Was I tapped out from to previous witty and humorous encounters? Sure DD was on my mind, but certainly not to the point of distraction.

Now you know how well the date was going it’s obvious that this one two can remain anonymous, not needing a nickname.

When date number three offered to head over to the bar where a friend was having her own online encounter, it was an escape from the silent agony creeping into an obvious road to nowhere. Besides, her friend might be cute and wouldn’t it make for a wonderful story to meet your one true love when you weren’t even on the same date?

No need to worry about that.

I won’t bore you with the details, but let’s just say that she met all the stereotypes of an over the hill Jewish girl looking for love in all the wrong places. Judging by her laugh lines she obvious had lived a life of hysterics and had no shape to her body. But its okay, these features weren’t so noticeable as you tended to focus on the buggy, and baggy, eyes.

Don't get me wrong, I've dated many Jewish women in my life and loved the experience. They were beautiful, funny and so much fun to be with. I’m not trying to sound bitter in anyway, but regardless of thier religous beliefs, I was at a table of people consumed with themselves, the money they earned and how being selective left them still looking for that one true love.

Her date wasn’t much better. Although a good looking guy a little on the heavier side and you didn’t need the fact that he drove a yellow corvette to know that not only was he a player, but (maybe) purposefully arrogant.

Being the Goy of the table, conversation floated around Hanukkah gifts, Jewish mothers and sitcoms I had never seen. Normally a man who could adapt to any conversation, I found myself vaguely following along, once or twice awkwardly participating.

Sure occasionally its great to go with the flow, gamble with that most precious of commodities and see where life can take you. But if you’re floating down a stream going in the totally wrong direction, sometimes it’s better to swim out and find a trail better suited. I had already decided I didn’t like my date. She didn’t like me. I didn’t like her friend either and the guy wasn’t anyone I would want to hang out with at all. Consequently, it was a blessing when the restaurant was closing and asked us to settle our tabs.

Needless to say, I’ve never spoken date number three ever again. Actually I spent the following week out of town on business, but still checked email and even browsed the dating sites, where I saw both of the latter ladies online at various times. Number two was even insistent we meet the following weekend when I returned.

Listening closely to my inner voice, I declined gracefully.

However, DD and I spoke three or four times a day while out of town and as much as enjoyable as the flirtatious attention was, the thought of having the money conversation hung over my otherwise happy thoughts and fantasies.

The White Rabbit of dating

2007-12-19T13:02:00.000-05:00

Anyone who has bought a house will attest; it’s the best of times, it’s the worst of times. Excitement is in the air which is scented with rampant possibilities.

Every house looked at has the possibility of being a new found sanctuary, a place to call home and keep all your most valuable stuff. And its not just your furniture, electronics or the pots and pans to fill it, but memories both of the past, present and those about to happen. Maybe because the stakes are so high, the decision on which house will become a home is made much more difficult.

So as you walk through the various properties scrutinizing the suitability of size, number of rooms as well as the front and back yards, you ask yourself all along if it feels ‘right’.

Is it just me, or does this sound incredibly similar to dating?

If we can make that comparison, does that make a real estate agent a kind of cupid?

I’ve begun to wonder if a person were to walk through one too many houses without putting in an offer, would the real estate agent (cupid) decide against showing me anymore properties? Or worse, if offers were made but the house never bought, could cupid, sorry the real estate agent, really get fed up with showing, um, houses to that indecisive buyer.

The latest excursion into the world of online dating has brought this thought and the accompanying comparisons to the surface. Why exactly.

A numbers thing

Feast or famine.

Like the livelihood actors that entertain us, the world of online dating is feast or famine, dropping its treasures at your feet in piles rather than selective, one exciting find at a time. As with any treasure left casually in your company, it has to be poked, prodded and looked at closely in the light to see if it is indeed worth as much as it appears to be, in all its sparkling, shining glory.

So I found myself with four women who would like to get together but only one night to see them in. It would be at this point I remind readers that Miss PP was in town and (contact the medical media) apparently surgically attached at my hip. But my reprieve came in the form of a friend she hadn’t seen in months wanting to get together at about the time my real estate agent, sorry cupid, dropped off four potential Mrs. Luckiest Guys on my emotional doorstep.

Up first, a divorced doctor (who we could call DD) with one child in high school and the other slightly younger. Forty-two years old, five foot five, light brown hair and hiding a strategically placed tattoo, I met DD in a small coffee bar tucked away in a relatively new shopping center. When she arrived there seemed some hesitancy when we met first met, and the mood certainly wasn’t helped by the incredibly quiet independently run coffee bar. The young staff was less than helpful and the only place that offered any kind of privacy was the fully stocked alcohol bar in the back of the room, but even that felt like a stage at times with the employees using it as a place to store their handbags and jackets. Whether they were coming over to hear what my date and I was saying (very unlikely) or simply didn’t respect our privacy and really needed to get their phones, they seemed to be within earshot quite often as they rummaged through their bags and purses.

Although the conversation seemed to flow, DD appeared either shy or nervous, and was it my imagination but was she blushing? It would be easy to write off the coffee as a noble effort but not really leading to anything else. But then an hour went by. And another. We talked and hung out in the empty coffee shop at the not so private bar area for a total of two and a half hours. Admittedly, some people simply have too much time on their hands and don’t mind hanging out if there’s nothing better to do, regardless of any love connection. Knowing I’ve been spoiled with passionate kisses goodbye at the end of an initial date, the thought of her wasting time surfaced with a pleasant but emotionless kiss on the cheek as we went our separate ways. But as she drove off to another online date, the texting flurry began with four or five being exchanged by the time I’d made it home.

Could I be so lucky as to attract a sexy, smart established doctor?

There really wasn’t time to wonder. I had two more dates lined up for the evening, quick drinks on the other side of town and then some later in a city on the way home. The scheduling should have been 5 pm for the first and 8.30pm for the second, but it was all contingent on Miss PP’s friend dragging her out the house early enough to where I could get ready for the dates without being obvious.

It never happened. As matter of fact, Miss PP left so late I tried to reschedule the 5pm drinks for another night, really only looking forward to seeing the young lady set for later. But the 5pm date was insistent, asking me to push back visiting my sister (my excuse for having to leave early) to another night. I call the date number two (or three if we’re really counting) and asked to make our meeting later. She non-chalantly agreed, which in itself should’ve worried me.

More about that later.

Memories and missed opportunities

2007-12-09T23:48:00.000-05:00

Everyone likes to think what they have is built on honesty. Regardless of what type of relationship; parent/child, brother/sister, opposite sex friendships and of course the most important one to us, the relationship of love.

But how honest is honest?

It would not only be impossible to share every thought and concern with the other person in your relationship (whichever version it may be), but also incredibly rude. I’m sure even Mother Theresa had bad thoughts about people she considered close, but unlike the majority of us she surely asked for forgiveness for those ill-wills. Contrary to the rest of society who found such great comfort in the saying which will go down as the tagline for the 1990’s, ‘Whatever’.

Besides, thinking your other half would want to hear every thought is such extreme narcissism.

Why go to such extreme lengths about a subject only peripherally connected with a dating blog?

To make me look like less a cad of course. Did someone mention narcissism?

Yes, I’m currently with Miss PP and yes I only just managed to get someone who shouldn’t have been in my life out of it just days before her return home from Europe. Why is all this going on? Because I have such a problem with being honest with Miss PP that as wonderful as she is to me and as much as my friends and family feel I would be hard-pressed to find any better, it simply doesn’t feel right.

There should be more of an explanation of what, what, when and how I let myself get so involved with Miss PP I find it so hard to get out, but lets talk about other more sensational problems popping around my mind.

Calm waters and friendly skies
In the time away from this blog I met an amazing woman. We have so many things in common. Very early forties (so early we’re in denial about being there), never had children and didn’t really want them. Every pore cried out passion, funny and she has that sense of adventure only limited to peeling back another layer to see how much further it can be pushed.

We had first written and made contact on one of the online dating sties before I settled with Miss PP. After a few emails she stopped writing. If I had never heard from her, her face and words would have faded away into the nothingness along with every other cyber flirtation that came to naught.

But in one my man-moments while Miss PP was away on business, I re-subscribed to the online dating service and although only on few days before the guilt kicked in and I came off, it was enough for the planets to align. BG, as she’ll be known was also testing the online waters again, saw my profile and dropped me a line explaining how she’s stopped writing because of getting together with an ex.

On a side note, why do people try this? There is a reason this particular person is an ex. Something severe happened or your feelings were so strong that a decision was made that this wouldn’t be the person you’d be spending the rest of your life with. How much can a person change to take them back? Does anyone really believe there can be that much change in a human being?

No surprise to hear then that the get together didn’t work. The new email was sweet really, if everything she wrote was true. I have no reason to think it wasn’t, and from what I learned later of her dramatic nature, it fits in perfectly to the story. Evidently BG let her mother read our earlier emails in the aftermath of breaking up again with the ex and both agreed that it was a shame she had chosen the ex over me. Although we hadn’t met, the tone, humor and ease of the emails were such a bond was made. When she saw my profile online again, her heart raced thinking this was a second chance at something she turned away.

With this sort of enthusiasm, it wasn’t long before we began talking on the phone during which she mentioned it was her birthday in a few days. When I asked what she was doing, the answer of ‘nothing special’ came back with a hint of sadness.

Without missing a beat I told her, “Well regardless what happens between us, you should let me take you out for your birthday. Birthdays are very special in my family and no-one should spend it having anything less than a fantastic time!”

This tells the person you’re talking to a few things about you. You come from a close family, have a caring heart and are willing to take a total stranger out to celebrate something special. Its all good stuff and puts such a positive image of you in their minds.

But more importantly, I really did mean it. There was something about her pictures, our emails and getting to talk to her, months later had left me with echoes of serendipity.

On the night I found myself in a familiar bar come restaurant waiting with a drink, rose sitting on the bar in front of me. Soon an older lady sitting on her own struck up a conversation asking about the rose and my date, the whole time it seemed as she was waiting for flirtatious responses or some sort of mutually interest indication. The gentleman in me avoided saying it was an internet date, instead I enjoyed the white lie of BG being a friend from my distance past, giving a better purpose to my anxiety and uncertainty of what she looked like.

The relief was so pronounced at BG’s appearance it felt as if I bounded off my barstool not just to say hello but also to bring her over to my new found friend. The introduction was made as if to tell the older lady to take those devouring eyes and roll them bake into her head.

But I was also near giddy with how beautiful BG looked, from her sparkling eyes, beautiful smile, shiny chestnut hair falling wither side of her high-cheek boned face and of course that amazing figure. All the right curves, going on for just the right amount of miles. I’m sure men fall to the temptation of staring at her cleavage, but I knew that not only was this our first date, but she was obviously in a vulnerable state.

Think about it. Probably still beating herself up over the bad decision to go back with the ex. It was her birthday and she was out on a date with a total stranger, leaving her to question the quality and more importantly, loyalty of her friends.

Many bad things can be said about me, but certainly not about my empathy for a hurt soul.

Conversation was so continuous, our eyes locked on each other that transitioning to the table and starting our bottle of wine for dinner seemed seamless. In fact, we were so wrapped in learning about each other, the only reason we ate that night was thanks to the waiter’s polite persistency.

The food was good but the company was better. Regardless of the quality of chef cooking that night, nothing would outdo food of conversation, generously served and carnivorously eaten.

If the night had ended at the check, I would still write about the date with the same enthusiasm.

But it didn’t.

You look so vaguely familiar

2007-12-02T23:49:00.000-05:00

To quote Mr. Twain, 'Reports of my death have been greatly exagerated'. Well it was probably more the death of this blog rather than the author. Although depending on who you speak with, there are some that would prefer the author.

So. It's one year and ten months later from my last post apologizing for not posting more frequently and promising to improve.

So much for promises.

Its been an unexpected ride in this lucky and interesting life. Although I have to all appearances settled with one woman over the last two and a bit years, it hasn't completely curtailed extra-curicular activities. Admittedly when we moved in together, that may've hindered things, but where theres a will......

Then I thought I'd had enough and moved out. But she followed along.

Did I ever mention I'm much better at wooing women than breaking up. The funniest story in my past predicaments was taking a young lady out to a nice restaurant to say farewell, and we ended being together for another three years.

My friends still laugh at that one.

You see, I know Miss PP isn't the one. Theres no passion in the kiss, spark from the touch and rarely a skip of the heart at the thought or even sight of her. Frankly, there was never really any passion as the past entries on this blog show.

Time isn't our friend
As much as I'd love to review all the gory (and glory I guess) details of what has happened (or at least what I can remember) with you right now, its awfully late, I have an incredibly early meeting in the morning and only came across this old blog in a wave of boredom.

There is so much to tell. Vacations that end in screaming matches with Miss PP. Passionate nights with various women, the last of which I only managed to break up with days before Miss PP got back from Europe. Even over this weekend I've been nervous with every car slowing in front of the house and paranoid about a knock at the door.

Tomorrow I'll collect my thoughts, make some notes and try to come back with some more detailed stories.

And as Mr. Twain often teased those he entertained, 'There are some amazing ones to tell. '

Been a bad, bad boy...

2006-02-23T14:04:00.000-05:00

Not what you're thinking, I was talking more along the lines of neglecting this blog.

Sorry.

But then again, maybe I'm not. Thats what makes me even more bad.

So I am actually settling down with one of the young ladies I've written about, which sort of explains why this blog has been pretty much dormant over the last few months. As much as I may come across as a cad, the heart is big and respect certainly deep for any person that makes into my life and I didn't think it fair to write too much. I still have about eight months worth of stories to tell and the notes have been kept, so maybe the events will make as far as the keyboard.

In the meantime, there are a few observations I would love to share with anyone left reading this blog. There is an air of desperation in the online dating world, and I'm not talking about the people looking for love.

Evidently the online dating companies have seen a slow in growth of subscribers with the nasty truth of how many people actual pay for the services in the first place coming to light.

"two months into 2006, and online dating sites are already seeing a lag in paying users. "Online Dating in 2006: Pricing Strategies to Drive Subscriber Growth" from JupierResearch finds revenue growth is driven by higher monthly fees instead of new membership. " reports Click Z Network (although the story was everywhere in the media about a month ago).

More Internet users visit dating sites than join, and only one-third of those who go to dating sites sign up for membership. This is the first time the research organization has seen a fall in conversion rates since it began tracking the space in 2003.

Its not surprising that only a third of the users are paying. Men are used to the fact that many sites offer women free if not reduced fee's. Just as in the real world, people selling a situation of men and women meeting know if you get the ladies to come the males will soon follow, usually with tongues hanging out and wallets open.

So if this is such old news, why am I talking about it now?

Well although I'm genuinely irked at some of the blantant false advertising, a dark part of me finds it a little funny. Lets take True's online dating service. This is just one the ads proliferating the internet;

Wow. Where can some lucky guy met a girl like that? Lets go online and see!

Putting in the search parameters of non-smoker, weight, ages 30-46 the search brings up the following women.....

These are not hand-picked pictures, but the first ones to come in the search I mentioned. There is no privacy issues being broken here since anyone with a computer and internet connection can see the pictures.

Now I understand that not only is the girl in the ad a paid model, but she's also in her young twenties. Regardless, there is a huge difference between the ad and the actual search. It's sort of like showing a Rolls Royce in the ad but selling you a Camry. I'm not bashing these very nice women, I would say the same if someone advertised Brad Pitt and then gave them me:) Nope, this is a slam on True.

Taking a whole different concern with the True advertising, I feel its setting women up to recieve inappropriate emails. Read the ad's tagline! 'Its nice to be naughty'

One of the biggest complaints women mentioned when I dated online was the rude and sexual offensive stuff men would write as soon as the initial email. This certainly can't help.

Surely this misleading practice only extends to advertising, right? Nope. Right now there are secveral accusations and even a court case of different online dating services planting fake profiles!

Who would've thought!

I guess when enough money's involved the truth can easily be lost. Just aske Kenneth Lay.

Regardless, the obvious fibbing by True doesn't seem to be helping. According the same story in Click Z Networks, they don't even make into the most popular poll, The most popular relationship sites on the Web, according to a survey conducted by GMI Poll, include Yahoo! (19 percent); Match.com (14 percent); and eHarmony.com (5 percent). Online dating sites are successful for 42 percent of those surveyed.

Now on the other end of the scale are sites like Myspace which doesn't claim to be a forum for dating, but as we'll see on the edition of lucky and interesting life theres more going than there should be. And its free!

Til next time.

Damn a generous and abundant life!

2005-12-13T08:45:00.000-05:00

Why does life has to be so cruel?

I'm getting together all the dates, fact and figures about who, what, when and how often to get this blog back in full swing when even more ladies are being thrown in the mix! It's so incredibly true, when you're not really looking for something life dumps a huge pile of it right on your doorstep.

Throw into the mix I'm still working on this little side project as well as work and what most would consider a relationship (obviously not by the other ladies I'm lucky enough to know) so I apologize for the few days since my last entry.

MSN had an interesting article from their match.com affiliate. Before I let you delve into it, it must be said that Match.com while having probably the best looking people, and the least weird in the online dating world (although this is a lowered standard) it's also the hardest to get a womans attention on. They get hundreds of emails a day with a majority of them being deleted without even being read. I was told this by the dates I've been out with from that service and I'm only guessing the problem lies with the loser men who have to spam email women to get a date.

How unfortunate for them.

Annoying for the rest of us, but still sad.

The upside to Match is when you actually get a date from that service, the women tend to be open to intimacy as early as the first date! I guess everything has it's ups and downs.

The article

When your ex is dating again
By Rachel Greenwald

As if the whole breakup or divorce process wasn’t painful enough, now you’ve got to absorb the news that your ex is dating up a storm—or even getting remarried. Whether you love, despise or are just friends with your ex, seeing him or her with someone else hurts, especially if your breakup was fairly recent. But you’re strong enough to handle it—here’s how:

Let yourself vent.

Get it all out: The anger, the frustration and perhaps even some rebel behavior. Give yourself an hour or so a week (but no more—you don’t want to wallow) to cry, have mean thoughts about your ex’s new mate, or tear through a couple of big bags of chips. It’s gonna feel good! Lean on your support network. Make sure you call upon your close friends now to stick by your side. Friends with whom you can be irrational, can cry to, and can simply call to have some fun are essential at this time. Don’t be shy about letting them know you really need their support. Focus on what you can control.

Your ex’s new relationships are something you can’t control. And as we all know in life, it’s useless to obsess about things over which we have no control. You can only control your own relationships and it’s entirely up to you whether you choose to find new ones now or wait. Limit the news flashes. Decide whether or not you want mutual friends to report on sightings or news about your ex’s dates. If third-party news flashes only upset you, tell everyone that you’d rather not hear it. Don’t go there.

Avoid places you know your ex frequents. Who needs those miserable, awkward moments when you bump into him or her on a date? That visual image of your ex on someone else’s arm will only fuel your sorrow or fury, so stay off the beaten path for awhile.

Stick to your own dating pace. Your ex’s reaction to your split was to jump right into someone else’s arms, but maybe that’s not your style. Everyone has a different way of reacting after a split, and certainly a different timetable for the recovery process. One client of mine hunkered down alone for two years, focusing on her young children and friends, starting therapy and throwing herself into her work as a writer. Another client started dating right away after his wife left him for another man. Dating quickly made him feel uplifted by having someone in his corner, even if it wasn’t the future Mrs. Right, just someone to play with and to kiss.

No matter what your ex is up to or what your friends say, don’t let yourself be rushed into dating again if you’re not ready. Listen to your own instincts and do what feels right to you.

Most importantly, there’s one thing you should never forget: It is not a race to move on after a split. Rather, it’s a marathon, and even though it’s tiring and painful at times, it is also exhilarating. This isn’t about who crosses the finish line first, but who sustains long-term happiness. Your ex may have a head start, but you, my friend, will win this marathon.

Little bit of this...a touch of that...

2005-12-09T02:28:00.000-05:00

Okay, it has been a while.

Too long.

When I started this blog to follow the adventures of my dating adventures, I promised myself it wouldn't be like the other blogs out there of a similar ilk and just suddenly stop when that special person appeared on the scene. So has someone and did I?

Yes and no. Not sure, not sure.

Some many things have happened and still occassionally do, no matter how good I try to be. Ive been wanting to come back and share with everyone. So here I am.

So where exactly are we?
I won't pick up the story tonight, that requires far too much organization that's just too far out of reach at this exact moment in time, but Saturday morning I'll feverishly type up an update and we can take it from there.

In the meantime an insight and what a sight.

Let me share one of our dirty little secrets
For what it's worth you can thank Brad Pitt for a return to the keyboard. I've had many moments I've wanted to share and even more insights it seemed funny to write about, but the ex-Mr. Jen became my muse as I stood in the checkout line in Publix, a leading grocery store chain here in South Florida.

It was a picture and a headline. 'Brad wants to adopt Angelina's Children' or some such wording and the former golden boy, in many senses of the word, sporting a messy crop of black hair. Then it hit me. Even the sexiest man in the world can fall under a womans spell, and this is the utlimate example of what you women love to do to us men.

We'll work backwards on this.

It seems to me, and many other of my fellow men, that you women must sit in the bar look across the room and say to your friends, 'There, that man. He's so hot, so sexy, he's perfect!' (Obviously I'm adlibbing here as I've never been privy to this part, but I'm sure it's right, word for word). 'Now I need to get in his life and change him!'

It would seem we men have whatever it is you women are looking for in a partner for you to laugh at our jokes, spend time with us and then become intimate. But then you have this uncontrolled urge to change us into your perfect man. Maybe it's from playing with your dolls too much as little girls, where you could dress them, change the hair and make them say exactly what you wanted during those make believe tea parties but you start doing it to your men long into your adulthood.

Even the most well known and beautiful people in the world play this game. Enter Brad and Angelina.

Brad Pitt is the desire of more women than we can count, and quite frankly all the other men's ego's probably couldn't handle knowing the exact number anyway. Yet even he has fallen under this spell. His infamous mop of golden brown and blonde hair has been replaced by a mess of black hair by a woman whose hair is darker than those big sexy eyes of hers.

Coincidence? I think not.

So why do you ladies do it and how could it happen to the sexiest man alive?

Trust me, personally I'm not complaining. My best wardrobe and hairstyle changes have come about from the nagging, sorry I mean urging of the woman in my life at the time. Little old me and the other men out there don't have the confidence and endorsement of being voted as the sexiest stud in the known universe behind us. Mr. Pitt does.

If I were him I could see the conversation going along the lines like this.

Angelina: "You know Brad baby, I think you'd look so sexy if you colored your hair a dark color like black! It would be so sexy and make me so hot!"

Brad(me): "Babe! I appreciate the input, really I do but this look has had me voted the sexiest man alive more times than I can count! Call me egotistical but I think the hairs working for me!"

Alas it didn't happen that way and we now have the golden boy playing the role of the dark haired louse who cheated on, lied about it and then divorced the girl next door with the perfect smile and even more perfect breasts.

What a sight!
Something that caught my eye even more than Brad's new do are some videos at a funny website called you tube. I'll leave you with this very funny commercial that hits the nail in the head......

There are som many more jokes there I won't even touch!

Enjoy and til next time...love'em and leave'em, well only if they're really bad.....

Whirlwind of decisions and temptation

2005-08-29T23:33:00.000-04:00

Day Fifty-Five of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

So where were we.

Met this wonderful Brazilian, BZ who although she didn't bowl me over, had me intrigued and so genuinely interested that I can't take my mind off of her. Just a point of confusion, I'd given this Brazilian goddess the name of PJ in one post, then for some reason renamed her BZ recently. Can't work out why that happened, apart from this annoying need to rename everyone for discresion purposes, but BZ it will be from now on with the nearly air-tight promise it won't happen again:)

As if to remind me of my last interest, or distraction at the very least, TP called today simply to say that she missed me. How does she manage to say something that should be sweet but make it come with so many sexual undertones and innuendo?

As much as I wanted KC and I to be something special, our first official date just wasn't as body tingling as when we first met a few nights ago.

AH would would love for us to have a second date but my shallowness rears it ugly head with those naging feelings that that nicely round body she has today will only turn out to be a frumpy regret in a very short time.

Of course all of this is going on while I'm trying to work out what my true feelings are for Miss PP and quite frankly, do I even have a say since she ignores any attempts to break-up.

Looking back on my past posts and through the list of numbers I have on a short list of people to call, I see RB's name.

Quite honestly, aren't there enough people here to wonder about without bringing in someone who hasn't even made it to a date yet?

Pleasant surprises

2005-08-22T21:18:00.000-04:00

Day Fifty-Four of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Salvation can come in many forms.

To a starving man it would be a stale cracker. Someone dying of thirst, a cup of tepid water.

To Luckiest Guy it was Jennifer, one of Miss PP's very good friends who absolutely had to go out with her for dinner to talk about. men' problems. Where as all roads will lead to which ever saying you prefer, in this case this road of availability led to the cute Brazilian lady I've been emailing over the last few weeks.

We'd decided to meet at a bar nearer her and about twenty minutes south of me, which was geographically perfect keeping me as far away from Miss PP and her friend and consequently out of trouble. After all, nothing stiffens the flirting like looking over your shoulder for your sort-of girlfriend.

She arrived slightly later than I di but it was worth it. Not as curvy as I was used with the latin women I'd dated and certainly not strikingly beautiful. But as many a Brazilian will tell you, they're more than their South American nieghbors and Brazililan beauty comes from the confidence and passion not simple physical looks. My date BZ had all of this and more.

Her beauty seemed to come from a look in her eyes, the sexy curve in her smile and quite laugh that was ther but not obviously so. BZ was 5'4" and very thin with her hips coming out slightly and her breasts seeminging to be close to a B cup. Of course she had black/brown hair and an olive color to her skin.

I'm not sure if it was the giddiness of my new found freedom or being back in the arms of my favorite type of lady, of the latin culture but I was so enamoured with BZ as we settled in for drinks and eventually ordered dinner. The conversation was fun, vivacious and had an air of intrigue. I could tell she was trying to work out who I was and how much she really liked me.

But there was something missing.

The physical attraction was there for both of us, that was clear. Conversation happened without effort and it was obvious to all we made the cutest couple. I couldn't put my finger on what exactly was missing and to be quite honest I didn't really care at this point, I was just happy to be with someone who knew how to have adult, innuendos conversation and was completely open with her feelings and emotions. This was the ride I had stood in the line at Theme Park Romance for some time and I was going to enjoy it for as long as I could.

The night seemed to fly by and after a few glasses of wine that missing item that seemed to elude both of us was just a fading concern and we hadn't even finished our main course when the kissing had started. The kisses were fairly quick but intensely tender and bursting with passion. Everything was feeling so good actually that by the time it came for me to walk her to the car, we were both like schoolchildren, awkward and slightly shy.

It was still a good goodbye.

We promised to get together really soon and we both knew it wasn't just something that needed to be said to end the date, but a real commitment to each other.

That night I had mixed emotions as I lay in my bed, so happy with the date, concerned about that certain missing something and of course wondering what the next move was with Miss PP, BZ and myself.

For some reason none of the other ladies floating around in my life seemed to come to mind at that time.

Some say self-inflicted pain, others call it stupidity

2005-08-18T17:11:00.000-04:00

Day Fifty-Four of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Just when I thought my dating life was busting out into new territories and up to new heights, Miss PP had to have one her long stays in town.

I know I should be happy that we have the time to work on our problems and actually make an effort to see if theres something here. But if you have a person who's an alcoholic but won't admit the problem while still drinking (but not really heavy enough to be a pain) what do you do?

Countless time we've gone over the same concerns
- She shows no emotion or affection. She can't even say 'I love you'!

- Unless I initiate sex it doesn't happen, and even then theres not much agression on her part.

- Potty mouth. You wouldn't believe the words that come of that beautiful smile.

I guess I'll just have to try another approach!

On the other front TP and I spoke briefly today but that was my mental release from this purgatory with Miss PP.

AH sent another email which was very sweet, 'I hope you are having a very good week. I just wanted to tell you one more time what a good time I had last **** and how nice it was to meet you. I am not so good with the phone, so I write. I just think you are very nice, and sweet and FUNNY!, and I can't keep those thing to myself.'

Awwww. Still don't think I'm going to call her.

RB is out of town on vacation, once again made excuses not to call MB (she probably won't even take my call by the time I get around to making it) and KC did call but I was 'busy'.

A call that I do have to make is to this sexy brazilian that I've been writing too off and on. She wrote back today, 'Hi there, Nice to heard that you are ok and aren't upset with me! Give me a call when you have a chance! XXX-XXX-XXXX, Kisses PJ. Will definitely have to try and see her!

This will be a short entry because I have to head over to Miss PP's (sigh), but I will end it on an interesting note. This happened to me once before and although I have no spanish on my online dating profile/ad, latin women feel the need to write to me in Spanish. Got an email out of the blue today 'hola, como estas? te gustaria hablar conmigo, si asi lo deseas, cuentame que haces, tu estabas en ****** personals, ya no quieres hablar con nadie?

Okay!

Dinner with Marilyn

2005-08-16T18:59:00.000-04:00

Day Fifty-Three of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

I'm sure we seemed like the perfect couple as I picked up Miss PP from the airport last night. She even tilted her hed back and rested it on my shoulder with the rest of her body leaning into mine.

But the passion was at the level of a sister. Even the kiss was that of a close relative.

The next day (today) I did my work in the confused state of wanting to spend more time with KC so I was really disappointed when she called and told me an unexpected meeting came up. before I could get too down she asked timidly (well as timidly as KC could get) if I'd rather meet for dinner. I was already working on an excuse for Miss PP before KC had finished the question. We set up the time and place and it wasn't hard to hear the enthusiasm in either of our voices.

The plans lead me to a topic thats amazed most of my friends, whether its the fact that I'll do it so casually or that its done in the first place. I had arranged to meet KC at a restaurant not quarter of a mile from Miss PP's house and on a popular pedestrian restaurant row.

Wasn't I worried that Miss PP would casually walk on by?

Yes and no. Sure it would be a horrible scene, but I was giving fate an open opportunity to let me know if Miss PP and should break up or stay together. If she doesn't walk by, fate is being a friend and giving me the opportunity to keep working at it with her. If she does, then obviously we weren't meant to be. Simple. Besides I'm very quick at covering all accessible knives in a very short period of time, so apart from a bruising from a stale roll I was physically safe.

I spoke to TP, good conversation of course. We both knew that we couldn't get together for a few days so the call was pretty much bouncing between sweet emotions and dirty talk.

I didn't call MB. She could definitely disappear from the scene. Now ask me if that upsets me?

RB and I didn't talk, for some reason I didn't feel in the mood and I certainly didn't hear from her.

My Marilyn
KC wore a sexy black top with very tight hugging pants finished off with a color coordinated wrap around her waist. She was stunning and definitely more curvy than I remember. The conversation was fun but not as playful this time. I think we had to both remind ourselves that we' met each other later in the night with a few drinks in our system and dinner was coming from a cold start.

She certainly is intelligent, funny and best of all incredibly confident. I tried to open the doors a little with some innocent flirting and although she wasn't unresponsive there didn't seem to be the eagerness there was the other night.

Once again. Sober - tipsy.

After dinner we went to another restaurant for a coffee and some cheescake which is one of theose plans thats said to get more time out of the evening, but in this age of figure watch health conscious food obsession no one really does. Of course we both just had the coffee and I wasn't sure it was my disappointed imagination but I felt like someone had pulled the plug on our electricity by the end of our coffee. Now don't get me wrong, I didn't expect mad passionate sex on our first official date.

Well maybe...no just kidding!

I was expecting something more. A further build-up. Ascending the mountain of passion with an expected stop at a base camp, but certainly in sight of the peak.

Just a friendly kiss goodnight and promise to get together soon.

Heres the question though. Would it be bad to head over to Miss PP's now? I am after all in the neighborhood.

Hmmmm.

I'm sorry...who's life am I living?

2005-08-11T20:56:00.000-04:00

Day Fifty-Two of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

I guess you never can tell which way the wind will blow. Thinking that the online dating was slowing down, I'd resigned myself to a lull in my dating life. Actually this sounds like I was sad at the thought of a slower romantic life or even afraid to be alone, when really in some sort of relieved fashion I was looking forward to some 'down time'.

But as the Rolling Stones so plainly put it, ‘You can’t always get what you want. ...you just might find....you get what you need’. The events of the last twenty four hours have given me more choices than can be properly considered and trying very hard not to sound like I’m gloating, but I find myself with too many women and not enough time.

Here's the Readers Digest version of the problems.

Tonight I have to choose between seeing TP and Miss PP.

Tomorrow I have to try and sneak in lunch with KC and maybe a coffee with TP, especially if I don't see her tonight.

Last night when I was frolicking on cloud nine with KC, I was supposed to call MB and see if we could meet for a drink. Obviously that didn’t happen and since I essentially blew off MB it would be nice to make it up to her BUT I also have to find time to take RB out and see if we click. Who is RB? The plot thickens and she shall be revealed in just a few paragraphs!

When you also add into the mix that Miss PP is supposed to be here for the seven to ten days, I have serious scheduling problems.

Five women and absolutely no time. As fun as this may sound, it's nothing but aggravation and potential disappointment for everyone concerned.

So, the details of my dilemma’s.

Choosing between seeing TP and Miss PP tonight.
Tonight is going to be the only night that TP and I can get together for the next few days so why wouldn't I want to see her? Well I haven't seen Miss PP for about two weeks and if I don't pick her up from the airport tonight any work we've done on the phones on what you could call our relationship over this last week will be lost. Also, I have a believable excuse to get out of the date with TP but as hard as I thought, couldn't come up with anything to get out of seeing Miss PP. Maybe I don't want to get out of it?

Sneaking in lunch with KC
KC called me back today after I left a message this morning on her cellphone. She was as lively and vivacious as she was last night, mixing her sharp humor into the aggressive yet very southern way she spoke was drawing me into her flirtatious world even more. Just as last night, she left no doubt that not only did she like me but she didn't care if I knew it.

My friends were guessing at her age at being a little more than I’d thought so the whole time we were talking today I was trying to find out her age without directly asking her. She did tell me about her former marriage and children, who were in college and this put KC in her early forties. Not bad at all, especially with how great she looked last night.

We had some interests in common as well as our natural outgoing personalities. She loved my boldness last night when we met and seemed to get breathless and turned on as she spoke about it. I guess we’re both passionate too. Using the rule that everything, no matter how small is said for a reason, I was impressed the she asked if a female friend I'd mentioned was a 'friend with benefits'. Her tone gave the notion a nod of approval and although I would never want that kind of benefit with this particular friend, I was excited that KC and I had a similar open minded view towards sex. This could be very nice.

She wanted to see each other as soon as possible, didn't matter where or what we did. I used an excuse of a family member coming in town to explain away the next few busy days and initially we talked about something three days out. I wasn't sure if she was toying with me by throwing her confident sexuality in my face. With her vivaciousness teasing me I couldn't wait three days to see her, so I suggested tomorrow for lunch.

As we wrapped up the conversation I was beginning to think this could be that special one.

When is a lunch more than a lunch?
My friend called first thing this morning to make sure we were still meeting for lunch. I’m glad she called because the lunch date had slipped my mind, but it was the way she asked. An instinct urged me to ask what was she up to.

"Remember I told you about the thirty year old girl I work with? I sort of showed her your online profile." I could hear my friends smile grow as she explained her plotting. "She thinks you're cute!"

I don't hide the fact that I'm on the internet dating sites, in fact sometimes my friends will find the ads of cute girls for me that I somehow missed. When I asked what that had to do with lunch, the next stage of her love matching master plan was revealed. The young lady, RB wanted to meet me in person and just make sure that the pictures on my ad matched the real thing. With the way things were going with MB, TP and even Miss PP my ego could handle a blind date (of sorts) rejection so we firmed up the time and who's office we're going to meet at.

It was only a matter of minutes after I arrived at my friends office that RB came down to say hello. She was five feet ten inches, striking and although slim still managed some very nice curves. Long straight dark brown hair that verged on the color of black floated lightly as she nervously moved her head around following the conversation of the group that had magically formed around us. We both tried to sneak looks at the other without being caught not so much by each other, but by the others who seemed to enjoy our awkwardness.

Finally we all used the excuse of separate lunch appointments to go our separate ways and let the dying discussion have it’s final breath. Just moments later with out food ordered my friend started to cross-examine me regarding my thoughts and impressions of RB. Regardless of how close you are to a female friend, it’s tough to give a guy’s true opinion of a prospective date, especially when men’s first thoughts are a little more ‘basic’ than the what women look for in initial meetings. But when my friend mentioned that RB had a tattoo, she went to the top of the list of who I wanted to see over the next few days. My friend laughed at my obvious reaction the news of RB's tattoo. Yes, she knew how to get my interest.

Within an hour of getting back from lunch my friend sent a text message to my cell with RB's cell number. I guess I'm not the only one interested.

Not wanting to waste a perfectly good number, I called RB to thank her for coming by and taking time out of her busy day to say hello. The fact that the conversation just happened to continue for the next forty five minutes was obviously nice and certainly a good sign. We made tentative plans to get together next week and as I hung up the only downside to the afternoons events was finding out RB smoked.

I guess no one’s perfect.

I sat in my office and looked around but didn’t see the walls of my office, my some space to stare into as I worked out my next move. Karma had been pretty good to me over the last twenty four hours and since I wanted to stay on its good side the right decisions needed to be made. Not right as in what’s best for me, but right in the sense that each person affected by any decisions made doesn’t feel hurt or shortchanged. As I said earlier, I had a built in excuse to miss out on seeing TP tonight and had even laid some of the ground work for it to sound like a matter of course.

I made the call and tried to sound as sad as I could that we wouldn’t be seeing each other tonight. I couldn’t face calling MB. I promised myself that I’d call her tomorrow.

Of course I was at the airport later that night with flowers in my hand, a smile on my face and hopeful thoughts in my heart.

Marilyn lives...and is looking really good!

2005-08-08T00:04:00.000-04:00

Day Fifty-One of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

A surprise phone call had me sitting at lunch with MB. She’s very cute, smart, funny and independent enough to for you to know it would be an all round equal relationship. So why aren’t I dating her?

I don’t know.

There’s just something about her that has me hesitating over dating her and since we both know a lot of the same people maybe we should just be friends. It’s all just a little too close to home. But that doesn’t stop me from being friendly and flirty enough to keep that door of opportunity cracked open just a little.

Lunch and it’s possibilities left a smile on my face, which was about to get broader and even more enthusiastic by the end of the night.

Sometimes you'll be out in the bars and meet someone who's so outgoing and confident; you have to wonder who's chasing who. KC is just that kind of person and quite frankly I still don't know who picked up who.

As I mentioned earlier, I had such a good time with my friend WL just going for drinks it really didn't matter if we met any women or not. But because we both had a cynical sense of humor, the night was full of laughter and we always seemed to attract a nice group of people.

I first saw KC early in the evening as we walked into one of our usual hang outs. Between the lime green knit top and her Marilyn Monroe look it was hard to miss her and her friends sitting at the larger back bar of the popular restaurant and club having a great time. I would’ve gone over to talk to her but WL thought I set them up instead of keeping KC for myself. He’d never asked that before and rather than actually face this quandary I suggested we move to another bar, just a few blocks up the street.

The second bar was smaller and consequently always appeared more crowded than it really was. Regardless the music kept the bar dancing and with the bodies packed in tighter always felt more fun. It wasn’t long before I caught the attention of a cuter lady who was more WL’s age than mine. He wanted an introduction, he’ll get one!

It wasn’t long before our new friend, WL and I were talking and joking like we’d known each other for years swapping stories and innuendos enough to keep the laughter flowing. As soon as I started to look around the bar to find a playdate for Lucky Guy, who should walk past me but KC! Our eyes met and I threw out the passing comment of asking why she was following me and her response was even cuter. Well I’m sure it was but the band drowned out her voice, but I could see but the flirty and nearly wicked look she gave with the comment and it was enough to let me know KC was something special. But as my eyes followed her walk across the bar and find a seat in the furthest corner from me, my mind was working out what the next move should, or could be.

The answer came in the form of a lizard lounge who apparently was getting too close to comfort for KC. As I watched her shift uncomfortably on her stool as an older, greasy guy had no inhibitions with being a close-talker and was oblivious to her body language that screamed for him to not only leave, but to go sooner than later. WL seemed to be happily involved with woman I’d introduced him too so I wasn’t needed here. No, my services were obviously needed elsewhere and you didn’t need to ask me twice. But how to make the approach?

My instinct kicked in. As I got closer to her she looked up and I just put out my hand asking her to dance. It couldn’t have been scripted better, for both my opening and her response as she hopped off the stool and we made our way to the dance floor. Once out there I explained that I could see she was getting a little nervous with her new found fan and just had to come over to help. With a half mocking look I confessed that the upside to the rescue was a dance with her. Yes, the charm was in full gear.

It wasn’t long before we joined WL and his new-found friend where we found out the two girls had the same first names. Coincidence, I think not. WL wasn’t happy with his date for the evening and I could tell KC was getting worried about leaving her friends on their own, so it seemed that our short blissful time together was quickly coming to an end. All that was left was and exchange of telephone numbers and tender kiss goodbye that was one of the more amazing that I’ve ever had.

Everything about KC and how we met certainly made up for having to listen to WL complain about who he was set up with and the fact I wouldn’t let him have KC all the way home, all said through a drunken slur.

What a magical night!

All the news that is news

2005-08-03T17:47:00.000-04:00

Came across some funny news stories about dating I just had to share..........

Enjoy!

And you thought you were the only one!
Deodorant? Check. Food-free teeth? Check. Googled your date? Check. When it comes to modern courtship, cyber-stalking is increasingly part of pre-date preparation. Read more of the article here.....

Finally a peer to peer network worth connecting too
Dating Share melds online dating with exciting new tools introducing single people to novel uses for peer to peer file sharing services like Napster. The company hopes to deliver dating into the 21st century. Daters download a free peer to peer client (P2P dating software), their gateway to exciting possibilities in love and romance. File sharing programs make online dating come alive, turning a two dimensional browse through static pages to a dynamic three dimensional journey enhanced with music, video and chat. Read more of the article here.......

Even the birds and bees do it...................
A Nielsen//NetRatings survey on online dating in the U.K. finds that one in three Internet users would now use the Web to meet a potential dating partner. In fact, the Internet -- including online personals, dating sites, chat rooms and discussion boards -- ties with meeting people at work as the third most popular method for getting a date. Read more of the article here......

If it's not love at least he'll always have clean sheets!
David Schwimmer is said to be dating a sexy hotel worker, according to sources close to the star. The former 'Friends' actor met the brunette beauty while dining at London's swanky Soho Hotel, where she works, and plucked up the courage to ask her out on a date.Read more of the article here......

And finally, you never know who you're really talking to in cyber-space
Catwoman actress Halle Berry has revealed that chatting with strangers on internet dating sites is her new pastime. ( A rather sarcastic note here might be that she'll probably get to more people this way than her last movie 'Catwoman' did). Read more of the article here.....

Franticly fighting through the barren landscape

2005-08-03T01:56:00.000-04:00

Day Fifty of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Although it’s not going to seem it when I write, but today was a very busy day.

Emails flew back and forth between TP and I, and all of them barely making it through the very strict server filters that my work computers screen my email with. I would have her write to my personal email address, which she has but I can’t check that at work! How does my company expect a man to get his loins excited with all these rules!

It was sort of un in a way, the teasingly clean but insinuating emails going back and forth with my imagination picturing her sitting at her keyboard in the classroom, long sexy legs, short skirt and naughty thoughts. Hmmmm.

Had a surprise call from MB. I kept it friendly but flirty enough to allow me to ask her out at a future date. As cute as she is, right now she’s not quite making the cut.

Finally a young latin lady who I'd been exchanging emails with called me today and as excited as I was, I can’t see it going any further. It would be nice for fate to prove me wrong since she’s very sexy. We’ll see.

Got this email today, “hola, como estas? te gustaria hablar conmigo, si asi lo deseas, cuentame que haces, tu estabas en ******* personals, ya no quieres hablar con nadie?”

I appreciated the email, but I never said that I spoke Spanish so why would she send this to me?

I don’t think I’ll even bother to respond.

What gives a woman dating potential?

2005-08-03T01:48:00.000-04:00

MB is one of those people that has you questioning what you really want from a woman and of course the person you're going to spend the rest of your life with.

I knew her at my previous job and it was a pleasant surprise when I joined this new company to find she was working just a few floors above me. Could it be that my answeer to all my prayers for eternal love was just an elevator ride away?

Standing a little taller than I like at 5'9" and with the blonde hair that for some reason does nothing for me, she has one of those personalities that shines beyond any physical limitations. Not pretty but incredibly cute and any man should be happy to have her at their side. She doesn't want a rich man, just someone who is a little clever and has enough of a funny bone to appreciate to her dry sense of humor. Although not fat her curves are limited but certainly there in a subtle fashion.

This is MB.

A face to the blog...well sort of....

2005-08-01T19:34:00.000-04:00

So is it just me or does it seem that every other blog has a nice picture up near the top of the profile. The author of the blog proudly overlooks their work as a King would his Kingdom.

Now as much as I'd like to feel neglected, I do understand that I write this in the veil of anonymity which works against my picture being proudly mounted. Not wanting to be left out though and being the ever clever and most resourceful soul I came up with the compromise of a dashing picture of someone else who I can live vicariously through. I'll admit this is incredibly warped logic since it is MY blog, but it serves it purpose and who knows how the people who come later to this blog and aren't privy to the truth will react.

Funny.

So here is the person in question, he's quite famous but obviously in more of a historical sense.

Just leave me alone!!!!

2005-08-01T19:06:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Nine of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

There are some days that Batman forsakes the night to hit the beach for a tan, Superman has a laundry day and the Green Lantern leaves his ring at home as he runs up the credit card at the Sunday sales. It’s in this vein that Lucky Guy (who is no way anywhere near the dizzying heights of the aforementioned heroes) just has to lock away the world and have some quiet time to himself.

Miss PP and I were talking, if not uncomfortably. TP and I are talking on so many levels with the more physical ones seemingly the more satisfying, that is if last night is anyway to judge.

Like a pollster in the heat of a general election, my phone was ringing with final choices made left, right and center (not that there ever is a center for politics). Now some calls I answered and others rolled over to the greatest invention to hit dating since the sick aunt excuse, voicemail.

It was from these jewels that I learned:
AA has guessed it’s pretty much over and in a very nice way asked to know why?

AH really enjoyed our lunch the other day and still wants to get together.

TP wanted to have phone sex (I did call that one back).

The email was still quiet which strangely enough didn’t bother me quite as much as it has the last few nights. Finally heard back from this very pretty Brazilian girl, JB who I mentioned before. I guess we had a mix up in communication since she was waiting to hear from me! Looks like we’ll be speaking on the phone real soon.

Is that a camera on our date, or are you just glad to see me?

2005-07-28T22:11:00.000-04:00

Because this is a dating blog about looking for that one true love, it's not often that there's anything to link too in the 'real' world. That was until I happened to be channel surfing tonight and stumbled across ABC's 'Hooking Up'.

If you haven't heard about this it's ABC's documentary series which follows 11 women through a year of online dating. It follows the women as they set up a profile and dating ad on an online dating site and on through the dates themselves, the whole time with the camera's rolling date warts and all.

Tonight was the first time I've seen it and have missed the first two episodes but even meeting these women this late in the show I can see that ABC managed to find all the stereotypes the gullible one, the bitch and of course the woman that thinks no man will ever be good enough. The men that they date aren't much better off, the incredibly nice guy that will always be the girls best-friend (ugh), the player that sleeps with three women in a week (hate this man ;) ) and the totally clueless guys that only get second dates because they're perfect marriage-material (this is female code for 'I can mold him into anything I want!').

Must watch? Not really. Interesting if you happen to be trying the internet dating thing? Definitely!

To go where no man wants to go........FLOWERS

2005-07-28T22:02:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Eight of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

So it's official. Miss PP woke up in a hotel somewhere in the country and got ready to face the world. This in itself isn't unusual; after all she travels 3 weeks in the month to meet with clients. What does make this morning different from any other is that it follows a three day stay at her home in South Florida where not only did we not get together, but we didn't even speak.

As much as that thought hurt, I was still feeling pretty good about my time with TP and I decided to do something I try to avoid. Sending flowers. This is a tough call to make, it can either be read as too creepy or push what you have into committed relationship at light-speed. There were circumstances that made it easier to order the flowers and since I tend to be a bit of a romantic at heart anyway, I decided to throw caution to the wind and say why not? Of course I didn’t have her work address and wasn’t one hundred percent certain about her last name. I’ll allow a brief pause here for all the female readers to utter the male bashing epitaphs. Within fifteen minutes of clicking around on the internet I felt nearly certain that I had the right address and placed an order for a dozen red roses, in a nice vase of course!

What is that saying about fools rushing in? No sooner had I ordered the flowers than Fed Ex delivered a package containing a mildly thoughtful gift. It was from Miss PP.

Guess who just joined the ranks of the Jerk-List?

Looking at the packing note I saw that they were ordered two days before my text messages. To be totally fair and maybe even removing myself from the J-List, the idea of the present wasn't totally unprompted since there are other reasons that she sent them but as much as I would like too, I can't go into here. Also there is a thought that she could've called at anytime during her visit home to try and break the ice, but chose not to. Not only did I know when she’d ordered them, but by going on the manufacturers website I saw that they cost a reasonable amount of money. Before we all sit back and bless the age of the internet, no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t find out where she was in the country or even which hotel she was in. Call me crazy but these details are sort of important if I wanted to send her flowers, just for instance. Eventually I just decided to thank her for the thoughtful gift and managed to find out where she was and where she was staying in a casual round about manner. Just when I thought it would get easier, none of the major internet sites could deliver today, but remembering this is Luckiest Guy we’re talking about here I certainly wasn’t down for the count. Since I knew the hotel she was staying at, I called the front desk and explained I really needed to get flowers to one of their guests and asked who they used when they wanted the flowers to be beautiful and most of delivered on time. Not only did I get to speak to the nicest florist in all of New Jersey but the flowers worked out to be a good $25 dollars cheaper than I would’ve spent on an internet florist!

By the end of my workday I had two women calling me just ecstatic about the flowers and it was so nice to hear the joy in their voices. Needless to say the men in my office thought I had more money than sense sending out flowers to two women on the same day, but these are married men that only buy flowers for anniversaries and to guarantee sex.

TP came by for about half an hour in the evening to thank me for the flowers and even brought over some gifts. It was sweet and spicy, but not for food, well not this time anyway,

So end of the day, I was a little poorer in money but my soul was definitely better for doing the right thing for both women.

Time to sort out the sock drawer

2005-07-26T13:41:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Seven of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Life always seems to give you the least to do when you have the most time.

I was reminded of this today.

I'd broken up with Miss PP a few days ago so even though she was in town we weren't speaking. TP was spending time with her children after our fantastic time last night. I'd had an email and phone call from AH and she seemed to enjoy our lunch yesterday afternoon. I could tell from the conversation that she'd be open to us getting together today, but there was too much going on in my mind to muddy the waters further. The confusion was from my thought process of whether or not AH and I should ever see each other again, what was I going to do about TP being so perfect but having a house full of children and then there was this nagging feeling about Miss PP.

With all this time on my hands you'd think I'd be open to answer the flow of emails and flirts from the online dating sites that seemed to be arriving in generous numbers over the last week. But today I didn't get one. Nada. Not a thing. I could swear I heard life laughing, ever so gently, quietly under the sound of the air-conditioner running in my house.

A great idea is never forgotten!
I hope everyone's been putting some thought and effort towards the brilliant idea to find true love I recently wrote about. I had to smile when I found this article relating precisely to the biggest hurdle in the plan. Now maybe we can start making some headway!

Well not to bore you with the down time, I've got a story of dating a young lady I met about ten months ago which always makes my freinds laugh and even bring up occassionally over drinks.

I hope you enjoy the Night of the Italian Greyhounds!

The Night of the Italian Greyhounds

2005-07-26T12:52:00.000-04:00

This is not a story for the weak of heart or those of a lesser constitution. When this tale has been told in all it's darkest details many a person has looked away in disbelief making the hardest possible mental effort to scrub all traces of it from their minds. I give you (cue lightning).....

The Night of the Italian Greyhounds
I started talking with DC through one of the online dating sites and within a few emails we had decided to meet at an upscale restaurant that has a beautiful long bar with the classic look of mirrors behind it seemingly taken directly from something you would see in the 1930's and 40's. Everything about the bar was elegant and magnificent, which was just as well since it was located in a more affluent town (I wrote about it here) where the patrons would expect no less.

DC was everything she appeared to be in her online profile; beautiful, sophisticated, funny and very down to earth. Standing at about 5'2" she was in her early forties, slim build with just a slightly darker complexion brought out by her straight shoulder lengthed dark brown hair. Although she had come close a few times, had never married and didn't have any children. The first meeting was like a breath of fresh air to me, happening in the middle of some really disappointing online dates so we spent more and more time together and it wasn't long before I was sleeping over at her house.

Like DC, her house was lush with nuances and an air of culture with the dark woods, classic art expensively framed and knick knacks that occupied the nooks and crannies of every room. It wasn't surprising then to find that she owned a breed of dog that was small, uncommon and like all things of the bluer blood, just slightly high maintenance.

The Italian Greyhound is the smallest of the family of gazehounds (dogs that hunt by sight). Like most pedigrees the breed is an old one and is believed to have originated more than 2,000 years ago in the countries now known as Greece and Turkey. DC had two of them who she loved not just because they were her pride and joy, but also because the dogs had an amazing knack for showing affection. Even their eys would look up at you as if to say 'If you don't love me, I swear I'll just start crying right here!'.

Personally I love dogs and it's been rare not to have one in my life. I'm even of the thinking that the smaller dogs are closer to their owners when allowed to sleep on the bed, but my thinking was sorely tested with DC's pair.

First of all, we couldn't leave them in another room to have any 'private time'. If we shut the door they would howl loud enough to make a dog ten times their size proud and doors were witness the damage the nails on their paws could do. Because of this temperament DC couldn't come to my place and leave them alone overnight and really it wasn't too much of a problem to have them with the first few nights I stayed at hers.

But it seems that the dogs became comfortable with me. Maybe too comfortable and certainly too familiar.

I was laying in her bed while she was either off in the shower or in the other room doing something but the dogs decided to hang out with me. Not a problem, I wanted them to like me since I knew they meant so much to DC. I was collecting my thoughts after a particularly eventful love making session, laying naked on top of the sheet. Dogs being dogs they started to take an interest in my more personal region and as many places as he's been, a dog's nose poking around there isn't in the cards. Not wanting to make much of a fuss and certainly not wanting to discipline the pups, I casually turned over on my stomach to continue my contemplations of DC and I.

I was deep in thought with the mattress moving as the dogs made their way around the bed doing what bored dogs do. Just as the movement stopped I felt it!

It couldn't be. Must be my imagination! Since my imagination isn't vivid enough to fool my senses, it had to be really happening!

One of the dogs had pushed his cold wet narrow nose right into my butt cheeks! Only the clenching stopped the invasion from marching on into its obvious destination. I don't know who was more shocked, me when I realized what was going on or the dog when I screamed and jumped off of the bed!

When DC came in I explained what'd happened and she was at a loss on how to react, and I would hope that life doesn't prepare you for handling your dog shoving it's nose up your boyfriends ass.

Being the gentleman and knowing her love for the dogs, everyone calmed down and we carried on into the night. Believe it or not, it really wasn't his incident that ended everything between DC and I, although it did come back partly to the dogs. I guess as far as they were concerned we had gotten a lot closer (not as close as they would've liked it seems) and they took to sleeping curled up partly on my pillow and also partly on me. Trust me when I tell you nothing ruins a nights sleep like an Italian Greyhound curled up on your head. After two nights of staying at her house I walk like the walking dead from the lack of sleep. It was this and some other jealousy issues she had that eventually killed the relationship.

I always say you should take something from every relationship, and from DC I took the understanding that if you see an Italian Greyhound, keep your back to the wall!

Brave new world....of Love!

2005-07-24T16:17:00.000-04:00

Like everyone who finds themselves trudging through the world of singledom and dating I keep thinking there has to be a better way to find your one true love, the person whom you can spend the rest of your life with.

Don’t get too excited, but I may've arrived at the ultimate and possibly most perfect plan to find long lasting, deep love in the truest sense. Because of everything that’s been shared over the last few months I think it’s only right that I include you in on this express pass to eternal bliss.

I know, generosity is my biggest flaw. Mea culpa, mea culpa.

The first stage involves inventing a time machine to travel at least fifty years into the future. I say this amount of time since the plan relies completely on the science of cloning to be entirely perfected and as commonplace as organ transplants are today. If the science isn't quite perfected by that time then we'll have to travel further and further into the future until we find the capable technology as this quite crucial to the master plan.

Once arrived at the correct point in time, my single friends and I will find an agency that’s not unlike a dating agency except one doesn't chose from a pool of eligible candidates but rather a catalog of cloned rock stars, actors and models. With a little genetic tweaking to hone the clones' desires, imagine the pleasure of taking home your very own Angela Jolie who only has eyes and lustful intentions for you and your happiness. The ladies could please themselves with the luxury of Brad Pitt who would be more than happy to wash the car barely clothed with the satisfaction of knowing it'll please his new found love.

Obviously I just gave two of the more well known examples, the plan allows for each person to find and have their very own real life fantasy. Perfect world with absolutely the perfect mate.

I realize of course that there are some challenges in my plan that need to be addressed. Admittedly time travel and the machine to help with this is crucial to it’s success, but I know if we put our collective minds to the hurdle we’ll be on our way to relationship heaven before you could say Dr. Who.

Besides, the invention has the caveat of aiding to my master plan of becoming extremely wealthy which involves going back in time and buying all the prime real estate before it becomes a hot commodity.

But we can talk about that next time!

How could you not love TP?

2005-07-22T07:55:00.000-04:00

My first few encounters with TP should've sent me running but something inside pushed me through the blocked caller i.d's and extreme caution she took in the beginning. Even when we were meeting for the first time I still didn't have her cell number and it was only luck that we managed to find each other.

Even as casually dressed as she was on that first date in her jeans and plain top you could feel the sexiness that was TP. She stood at 5'6" and her Mexican heritage gave her a darker look overall with brown hair with skin that was just a touch lighter. Not only was her figure nice and slim but she had legs that seemed to go on for miles making her appear taller than she really was. You would be fooled by her ethnic looks to think she would speak with an accent, but she sounded as american as the next person with her latin (mexican) as fluent as her english. everything about her sparkled, from the eyes to the smile and you felt wamred just to be around her.

Her story? Divorced from a guy that just had no ambitions and even less self-confidence and as is the way with these types of men he would take out his inadequacies on her, usually in a mostly verbal fashion. She had three children, two of which went to the school that she taught spanish at. It was a private school and TP had the pleasure of not only teaching the young teens how to handle live as well as spanish since their parents seemed to have more money that love or attention for their kids. This sums up the biggest and best quality of TP which would be her heart.

An anatomy of the perfect dinner date

2005-07-21T17:51:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Six of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. (Continued)

I headed over to TP’s house washed, showered and dressed in a nice shirt, jeans, casual dress shoes with everything coming together quite nicely, even if I do say so myself. I’d even given myself plenty of time to pick out a nice and appropriate bouquet for her at my local Publix. Understanding that I’ve always felt flowers were crucial for every quality date, it's just as important to make sure the right ones are bought for the appropriate moment of the relationship. After all, if you buy beautiful and expensive roses on the first date what do you bring her when everything really gets going? The lady in your life will say or think, 'I guess we're not as serious as I thought we were since he's still buying the same kinds of flowers that he bought from the first date!'. Hmmmm.

I don't bring you flowers...is it any wonder why?
The whole flower giving gets more complicated with how women view men in the first place. Although most men think being romantic will help in the whole dating cycle, unfortunately unless the woman is really into the guy anything that’s done, no matter how nice and thoughtful it is will actually paint you with the ‘creepy’ brush. Worse still it could turn you into one of those people that will only ever be the ‘best’ friend. Horrible thought.

But don’t think that by being humble in the early dates will make it any easier, if the flowers aren’t nice enough she’ll think you’re just cheap and that’s a label that even the most charming of men find hard to lose.

With so much riding on that bundle of pretty plants, time and consideration is needed when choosing the flowers. Of course they should be nice but more importantly match the person getting them such as a sunflower spring collection for the traditional woman who likes antiquing, while the South American dates prefer the vibrant purples. It's not easy and reminds me sort of like those quizzes you’d take in school of matching people on the left side of the page with items on the right. The only difference here being the printed people in the school quiz didn’t give indignant looks or tell her friends what a horrible person you were if you got it wrong!

Since thing were going pretty well with TP, I'd chosen half a dozen pink and yellow roses with the obligatory baby’s breath and other floral flourishes. Between me being out of town and us not seeing each other for over a week we were both so excited about tonight the whole incident of not returning her calls had either been forgotten or conveniently ignored, either way was fine with me.

When she opened the door it was hard to know what to look at first. Her beautiful face was glowing with a smile bigger than I’ve ever seen and she seemed to be bouncing like an excited little girl as her arms pulled me in for a kiss. Not just any kiss either, but the sort that I can imagine are given to servicemen after being away for many months with all the feelings of longing, passion and pure sensuality mixed in. Of course the flowers were a hit and a comment of ‘perfectly chosen’ was made. Lucky Guy guesses right again!

It was obvious that everything about her was perfectly planned and completely thought through by her as well as her friends. Out and out amazing would the closest way of humbly describing of how she looked. It was a simple red dress that loosely followed her figure ending at the mid-thigh, with her breasts pushed up for a distractingly generous cleavage and her dark skin contrasting nicely with the color of the dress. Her hair was up, but in that fashion that looks like it has just been put there in a haphazard way and could easily fall at any moment. I considered myself one of the luckiest men alive to gou with this woman on my arm tonight.

The night went on with drinks, dinner and coffee the whole time touching, kissing and of course talking which seemed easily constant. We both knew that what we had between us was such a natural feeling that we could’ve been a couple for 3 years and not just the actual 3 weeks.

Well she thought that, and I wanted too as well. Trust me, being the romantic I desperately wanted to believe and feel it with all my heart, but I’ve been blessed with this ability to make most people feel at ease with me in a very short amount of time. Maybe it’s the attentive way I listen, or that I tend to remind people of someone they know. I’ve never really come to a conclusion of any firmness on the matter and as much as the luxury has been enjoyed both professionally and personally, it was always justified that the talent was used for good and never evil! Indeed, the only time this trait worked against me was with Miss MM, and ironically it was because we were cut from the same cloth! I was taken aback when she confessed to me one night that the fact that she enjoyed most people and found herself fitting conveniently into anyone’s lifestyles or interests made it so hard to know if someone was a good match or not. This had been one of the main problems I’d had my entire life as well and it made me wonder if we were actually enjoying each others companies or just the shallowest, non-descript couple out there. Since we didn’t work out I guess one of us wasn’t as amiable as they thought they were.

Back to the date!

Dinner was followed by drinks at the local Jazz bar that was small, dark and just a little smokey. The music was loud, the drinks poured stiff and tonight fate helped with a perfect seat at the bar, right next to the dance floor and in front of the band. If we were grinding and flirting on the dance floor TP was straddling my leg, rubbing back and forth. Even through my jeans I could tell that she was incredibly turned on. When I told her what I'd noticed the fire in eyes grew as did her rubbing against not only my leg but also my whole body. The night was perfect from the moment I picked her up to walking back in her front door to drop her off. Then the passion took over. Our hands, like the moment were a blur as the fire raged and our bodies ached for the release that had been building not only the whole evening, but every teasing and tantalizing telephone conversation that'd proceeded. Clothes were moved to one side or dropped to the floor as our lips didn’t seem adequate enough to cover the skin and body parts they wanted to kiss. Moments were magically without measure and the satisfaction was intense until we were one right there against her wall unit, shaking every knick knack and photo frame with our passion.

Of course I stayed the night and we continued to make love, some of the times were gentle and others with animal like passion. As I drifted in and out of sleep and sex everything felt so right and for the first time in a long time I felt at home in someone’s arms.

But as I said goodbye to her in the morning, the pictures of her three younger children dotted around her apartment kept catching my eye and my mind told my heart that there was a cloud hanging over this potential paradise.

Lunch with a distinguished touch, feel and kiss!

2005-07-20T00:21:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Six of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Maybe I should subtitle this entry, and all those that follow it as 'Day x of life without Miss PP'.

If life were a movie, I would’ve woken up this morning with some jazz or rock tune singing the praises of single-hood and being a bachelor as I walked around my slick pad getting ready for another casual conquest. But life isn’t a movie, I don’t have a slick pad and I hung around in my bathrobe that although not disgustingly dirty, does show obvious shaving cream and hair gel stains. I wasn’t getting ready for a casual conquest but rather feeling strangely empty inside and a definite lack of direction.

But instead of looking inward and trying to understand what was going on, whether for good or bad my resolve that always carried me through the lonelier times kicked in and I started to get ready for lunch with AH. We’d picked one of the few restaurants in South Florida that was actually on the beach. I know it’s perplexing to think that out of all the miles of golden sand coastline the Sunshine State has there aren’t many places to eat and have a nice drink while you enjoyed the view of surf, sand and maybe the occasional thong, but it's sadly true. The place we’d chosen had tables that were as close as four feet from the edge of the beach, with even the view of a pier thrown in. Cheap at half the price.

AH looked exactly like her online ad, well in color anyway since the pictures were done in a classic black and white portrait style. You could tell that not only was she from South America, but also refined, cultured and a genuinely warm person. The light lime green sleeveless knit top and white linen pants were snug but not too cheaply tight. Her attire was relaxed, perfectly suited and looked like it has just leapt from the pages of Nordstom’s Spring/Summer catalog.

Her smile was as much fun as our conversation and equally as contagious as she talked about growing up around the world and managing the family business. It was this that took her to South America for anything from a few days to a few weeks. The conversation meandered and amused as good conversations always do and it wasn’t long before we were affectionately touching each other with the kisses following shortly after. Like her demeanor, her kisses were soft and gentle, but you could feel her give all of herself, passion and emotions in each and every touch of the lips. Personally I’ve never been embarrassed about kissing in public places, with the level of passion appropriate according to the venue. Restaurants, particularly at lunchtime, the kisses should be short and sweet with just a hint of tongue. Bars and clubs have the type of kisses to match the mood and music where it all builds up to all out tangling of the tongues and grinding of the bodies. I once had a woman straddle me as I sat on the tall barstool, and this was at a happy hour with just a work colleague! Shy I am not.

AH was a little self-conscious about the kisses but was feeling the mood and enjoying the chemistry. She actually instigated a few herself, grabbing my thigh to pull me towards her. You have to love the latin women and the natural given passion seemingly had as a birthright.

Reading all of this, one has to wonder why my search for eternal love (or something vaguely resembling it) wasn’t at an end with the adventures in the dating world no more. Some of the reasons are as admirable as the highest honor ever given and others are as shallow as condensation on a windowpane.

She desperately wanted to have children, three was a number mentioned several times and as regular visitors to this blog know, I’m beyond the point of wanting any of my own. If children were to be considered, they would be in their teens with the expectation that the young lady and I could begin our lives together and alone within the next few to five years.

AH seemed to be such a lady in so many ways. I didn’t see her the type to get down and dirty, either figuratively or sexually.

Finally, saving the most embarrassing confession for last, her figure was of an average build with curves in all the right places but slightly heavier than I’m used too. She wasn’t fat by any means but she was also still young, so there was a whole lifetime to add extra weight which we all know is inevitable as soon as you get in a comfortable relationship.

You may ask with all of the above thoughts going through my head why were we making out like a couple of love-struck teenagers? I tend to get caught up in the moment and she was a beautiful woman with an amazing personality and such a clever wit.

That’s Lucky-Guy, living for the moment and not the consequences.

Speaking of moments, I had to head home and get ready for my date with TP!

AH and I said our goodbyes as the valet brought around her very expensive car and we promised to talk tomorrow.

Absolutely!

I’ll be the first to admit that I was slightly confused over what to do with AH, but as time brought me closer to seeing TP again the concerns over my lunch date went further and further from my mind.

It was going to be a great night!

New beginnings?

2005-07-17T19:10:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Five of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Most people will start their day having a bagel while others will catch up on world events with the daily newspaper. In the world of the Luckiest Guy I started today with some text messages telling Miss PP that I'd be spending the next few days on my own instead of with her while she was in town. Nothing says good morning like the opening shots across the bow of USS Break-up.

I was none to impressed with her understanding or responses in our conversation last night. Her downright shock and disclaimer when the dreaded 'marriage' word came up really didn't leave me with the warmest of feelings. I don't want to marry the woman, but I do want to know that we're starting to have some kind of feelings for each other to where it's at least a possibility. Why can't she be coy, cute and complimented by the word or insuation? Because she has no heart?

Spoke to TP who was a little more awake this morning. She had my undersexed body and over active imagination believing I could hear those three-inch stiletto heels I always pictured her wearing as she walked around the classroom of fifteen year old boys. While were trying to make plans to get together the drawbacks to dating women with children came up as all the possibilities revolved around babysitters. I had pretty much concluded that Miss PP and I weren't seeing each other so the next few days were wide open for TP and I to get together. This meant a lot of laughter and even more sex!

The end result was most likely not tonight but definitely tomorrow. This was perfect since I really wanted to spend a night at home.

While having lunch with a client Miss PP called so I couldn't answer and judging by the voicemail I guess it’s just as well I didn't. She had received my text messages and was calling to wish me a pleasant few days. End of message. No 'I'll miss you's', 'maybe we can meet the day after tomorrow', as matter of fact I don't even think there was a bye said at the end of the voicemail. There was further proof I did the right thing.

Anyone can find someone to fill time with, a 'filler' so to speak but it’s particularly hard to find that special person you want to spend time with. I don't want to be anyone's 'filler' with the most selfish thought that while I was filling her time; my Ms Right could pass me by!

As soon as I got back to the office, it was to the phones calling the various numbers I'd collected over the last week or so and make sure the next few days wouldn't be too quiet.

Just to keep the scorecard current, that’s resting tonight, lunch with AH tomorrow and a date with TP tomorrow night! Who needs Miss PP?

Into the mailbag

2005-07-17T18:34:00.000-04:00

I know I've been promising to go over the emails going back and forth between myself and certain young ladies on a popular dating site, so here is a summary!

Peru
A very pretty, and slightly short Peruvian lady replied to an email I had sent her while I was recently out of town. Good news, she seems to have a warm and vibrant personality. Bad news is that she lives further away than I originally thought. As much as I love children her daughter is awfully young at only six years old. Being open and wanting to know more about her, I think I may just take advantage of the personal email address she sent me.

Worth a thousand words
An older woman sent me the pictures I asked since the one she had on her profile was a little blurry. Cute! Seems like an incredibly relaxed and easy-going person, but my gut is telling me theres more and it's not good.

Bikini, wax and all the other good things to name after a Country
I got a warm welcome home from a Brazillian that I've been swapping emails with and it certainly put a smile on my face. We'll call her JB because I have a good feeling about this one and will try my absolute hardest to at least have drinks or dinner with her. She's so cute, about 5'3" medium length brown, highlighted hair, slim, not too busty but nice curves. Her skin is that light brown that the darker skin Brazillians tend to have. Hmmmm.

Oops
A woman orginally from Brooklyn, but latin (see a pattern here yet) who didn't have a photo on her ad had sent me an email sometime ago and I finally recieved her pictures. Unfortunately she seems to be suffering from the 'magical mirror' syndrome because her weight is much more than the 'athletic and toned' description she chose for her ad. She als has three children living at home and although she didn't fib about have kids, such a number was never implied. It's a lot to go from a single life to raising three children.

A Columbian Lady
I finally got the telephone number from AH, a young lady I mentioned before. Bear in mind that the date on the post is over a month ago but thats more due to the lapse of me posting in a timely manner, rather than that much time really happening. In the great timeline of things it's only been about a week between the events.

Either way my concerns are still there that her pictures are only of her face and although her description is athletic and toned, there is the potential of her being on the heavier side such as with the woman originally from Brooklyn. But she is very pretty, obviously smart and educated as well as being latin. Worth a phone call I think!

Thanks, but no thanks
I've traded a few emails with another young lady who would rather talk on instant messenger rather than on the phone. With caller ID and voicemail it seems that screening is so simple, and wouldn't the urge to find that one special person be so strong that it would seem like an obvious choice? I think I may have to pass on the generous offer.

Ghosts of dating past
The most interesting part of internet dating is not only coming across people you may've written too before but the different response you get now over what you did then. This incredibley exotic looking woman who had the most amazing eyes wrote to me moths ago but the correspondence seemed to just die. Well she started writing me again, remembering who I was even and had the wonderful tactic of starting this round of emails with a round about apology. I guess she's serious this time because I now have her number. Regardless if I'm interested or not, do you think I'd do anything but call her?

And we leave tonight with....
Finally with the correspondence woth mentioning, a teacher/Professor sent me an email from an online dating site I hardly ever go to and use even less. Her pictures aren't up yet and you could tell that her Masters in English has a concentration of creative writing since she cutely said '...my pictures should be up soon....the website is making sure I din't slip any naked pictures in there, so it may be a couple of days'. Cute! Will have to definitely check those out!

Boys night out...and no alcohol?

2005-07-16T19:26:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Four of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It was a boy’s night out from work with a bunch of free passes to the premiere of a comedy that should become not only a summer smash, but also a cult classic. The movie was so funny and the laughter so consistently loud that you couldn’t hear some of the lines, and this was from an audience that ranged demographically over age as well as race.

Since this isn’t a blog about movies and I really want to keep some mystery to who, what and where, we’ll leave the subject of the movie with this thought. Go and see one of the few comedies out this weekend, you’ll love it, want to own it when it comes out on DVD and will most certainly thank me for the advice.

Speaking of advice, make sure to check out the following blog entry just below this one about online dating ads and what the really mean. If you have any observations of your own, or even some outlandish experiences, I’d love for you to email them to me.

The premiere was held in a town that has a reputation for valuing money above mostly everything else, even though the origins of it’s name goes back to vermin. Most feel this is ironic but certainly pointed. Consequently the ladies who live or even frequent this area of South Florida tend be shallower than a puddle in the desert. Indeed the only thing more fake than their surgical improvements are their attention and intentions towards men. It’s commonly felt and I even got to see it action at a popular hang-out in this town (it’s really a city but is so darned spread out and basically nothing but upscale housing developments, it doesn’t really feel like one) when I went to pay for drinks with a hundred bill and got majorly hit on by a lady standing next to me at the bar. She had the nerve to do this while I clearly had my arm around my girlfriend at the time. Sometimes however, I’ll look back on this and wonder if maybe it wasn’t just me she was interested in and perhaps I missed the chance to fulfill every mans fantasy. Well that time anyway!

Needless to say, I didn’t see or have any interest in any women at the premiere, or even at the dinner after. There was a moment with a younger lady when I was walking into the theater were we caught each others eyes and you could tell we both searched for something quick, cute and funny to say before I was shuffled up the stairs to my seat by the throngs of eager movie goers. It was no great loss that the moment was gone before the thought could be found since she was a little too young and maybe a tad too chunky (sorry for sound like a pig ladies) but I did smile when I saw her in the front of the theater with a microphone hosting the event. I guess if you’re going to have a passing fancy, it should be with one of the main women of the moment and in the room.

I headed happily home to a quite house too tired to look over my emails or even respond to the ones I had read already. Things in the online dating world were starting to get a little hectic again and I needed to get on top of it (excuse the pun) or it would get away from me.

With the movie being about love, of course it had me thinking about Miss PP and I. Something needed to be done, and soon. Put that on the to-do list for tomorrow!

What are they really saying in those online ads?

2005-07-15T15:41:00.000-04:00

After spending years dating and looking for love with the online dating sites, I thought it might be amusing (and of course helpful to some) to look at whats out there, on whats written, and whats actually meant. Just as with buying and selling real estate, the qualities of the flesh seem equally as coded, vague and maybe even sometimes, downright fibs!

I’m very picky….
I haven’t found anyone yet who would put up with my attitude!

I used to be a model
The pictures posted on my ad are at least ten years old and trust me…I don’t look anything like that now.

I’m used to the finer things in life
The more it costs the more I like it, that is if you’re paying.

I want a man to spoil me and I’ll spoil him in return.
You spend all your money on me and I’ll let you spend time with me.

Leave a way for me to contact you.
Even though I'm using this dating site to find the person I’m going to spend the rest of my life with, I'm far too cheap to pay the $20 a month subscription fee.

I’m looking for a gentleman that knows how to treat a lady.
Don’t even think you’re getting more than a handshake goodnight for at least the first few months.

I’ve been single for ____ years.
Yes I really am that much of a pain in the butt no one can stand me.

I want to be treated like a princess because I’m worth it.
Be prepared for indignant looks and major attitude if you ask me cook, clean or doing anything remotely resembling being helpful in your life.

I am a ….. person who speaks her mind when and where she wants….I am a person that does not take crap from anyone, if I don't like you I will tell you!
Rude, inconsiderate and they think the world should and does revolve around them. Is it any surprise they can’t find a date?

Age to me is nothing but a number
I’m much older than I claim to be in this ad.

If you've come across any that are amusing or funny, email me and I'll add them to the post!

Every drop that goes in must come out...and then some...

2005-07-14T07:54:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Three of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It was time to pay for my playing last night with the mother of all hang-overs. I woke up late and my hotel room was an absolute mess with clothes everywhere and the smell of sex hanging in the air.

Last night my colleagues and I had put a few drinks under our belts when one of them came up with the idea to make a bet that I couldn’t take the woman directly across the bar from us back to my hotel room. I managed to get her back here, but not before drinking every ounce of alcohol located in the city limits. Or so it felt like it this morning.

My guest from the bar last night had obviously quietly left in the early morning hours. The realizations were methodical, if not slightly slow and certainly clouded. Once all the dots were connected that I had a woman I’ve never met before in my hotel room and she was now gone, my first instinct was to find my wallet and give it a quick check to make sure all my cash and credit cards were there. Once I knew everything was where it was supposed to be, I had to tackle getting in the shower, packing my suitcase all in forty-five minutes and without throwing up from the intense hangover I was nursing.

I don’t have to go into any great literal lengths to tell you how my day went. Imagine the worse hangover you’ve ever had, add some appointments that required me to be professionally dressed and actually involved in the conversation and you can appreciate the self made hell I was working my way through.

Fortunately the appointments were done by midday and the rest of the day was used for flying back. It was only until the clock hit four thirty in the afternoon that I could eat anything that wanted to stay or say anything I really enjoyed saying.

Obviously my two colleagues, the maker of the mirth, the instigators of the insidious intentions had a few comments, laughs and even some admiration, but that can all be told for another entry. This short story in the ongoing dating adventures of Lucky Guy can make of for some the longer ones that have proceeded it.

The emerging highlight of this dismal day was that the emails from the online dating service have been hectic and the interest is immense.

But more of that later.

Betting the odds

2005-07-12T12:18:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Two of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. (Cont.)

She tried not to look at me as I made my way around the oval shaped bar with her being, of course on the complete opposite side to where my friends and I sat.

The business trip found myself and two of my married male colleagues in the chic bar of an equally nice restaurant. Some Martinis and the target rich environment had brought about a bet that I could get the older lady I was quickly approaching to go back to my hotel room with me. To even accept the bet I was clearly buzzed, but the fact that this story would be renowned and retold probably finalized my decision to take on the wager.

Since she had been flirting with us, or more particularly me throughout the evening even to the point of sending napkins over for a little drink mishap earlier, I knew starting a conversation wouldn’t be the problem. What should’ve been considered the challenge was getting her back to my hotel room. Well it would normally be an intimidating thought, especially since I really don’t look for one night stands and I was an out of town guy staying in a hotel, but neither of these seemed to affect my confidence which was propped up by a few drinks.

She broke the ice as I neared with a cute comment about me actually coming over and it wasn't long before I was suprisingly enjoying talking with her. She had brown, reddish hair and although it was obvious she was in her early forties, she wore it well. A pretty face with just a hint of freckles but always a smile it seemed. Though she was sitting down, it seemed as though her figure was slim and not too chesty. However, the most important part of her the personality and sense of humor were in abundance all wrapped together with an air of confidence. I guess the latter is what allowed her to sit in this bar alone as a single female.

Whether it was her personality growing on me or the alcohol taking effect, but she was looking prettier than I’d first thought and certainly was funny enough to be with. I found out that she had two children, her name was Mary-Ann and after about twenty minutes of casual conversation the first opportunity to test the waters presented itself. It wasn’t just an obvious opening but it was flagged, marked and yelling to be taken advantage of. She asked me where I was staying. I told her roughly where we were, how nice the staff were there and how great the view was. Then I mentioned in an offhand way that she should come by if she had the chance.

She smiled. It was a smile that could only come from someone who had experienced life enough to know not to take it, or anything less than death or tragedy too seriously. A knowing smile that seemed, in a slight way anyway, to appreciate the attention and believe it or not, the offer.

Gracefully refusing the chance and pointing out that she meets a lot of men like me in this town on business trips and never once needing to see their rooms. It was a polite way of saying no and at the same time allowing me to save face. We picked up the conversation and talked about her, where she worked and more about her children when my friends came over to join us. They were going back to the hotel and wanted make sure I had a ride back.

It wasn’t the fact that it was an obvious ploy to get Mary-Ann back to our hotel, it was more the juvenile grins on their faces as they said it that made the whole thing more than slightly ridiculous. After the consideration and undeserved respect she had given me in declining my initial offer, I wanted to save her the embarrassment or the need to back out of the forced ride and said I’d come back with them. Mary-Ann and I swapped cell numbers, shook hands goodnight and the guys and I left.

It was as if their childhood dog Skippy had just died. Like finding out there was no Easter Bunny and “no Virginia, there is no Santa Clause”, in their minds a legend had been dashed. Lucky Guy didn’t take home the bar-fly. As much as they tried to work through what just happened, I had this feeling that this wasn’t the end of the story for Mary-Ann and I.

It was only David that wanted to get to bed, Mark and I still had the partying spirit in us, in no way was it fueled by the numerous Martini’s we’d already drank I'm sure, so we headed back out to a bar the bartender at the chic bar/restaurant had mentioned absolutely everyone goes to after hours. Bearing a Mexican name with a layout that was a cross of a pool hall and ale house it was a lot more casual than where we’d just been but it looked fun. Any place that serves the drinks in a plastic cup is alright in my book!

I looked around the bar as we ordered the first round of drinks, there was really no-one here that I felt I could have fun with. All the half attractive girls were either far too young or already with a signifigant other. Opening my cellphone, I found the freshly saved number and called up Mary-Ann who'd left the other bar right after we did putting her about twenty minutes away on the way home. Five minutes of flirting later she was coming to the bar Mark and I were at. Never say never.

When she came, there was new level of comfort as we picked up where we left off only this time the conversation was decorated and emphasized with us touching and stroking each other. All the staff from the surrounding bars were turning up as the city started to roll up it's sidewalks in the early hours on the morning, with only our mexican pool bar come ale house staying open until sunrise. With all the wait staff fresh and ready to party a carnival atmosphere was taking hold, and Mark, Mary-Ann and I were more than happy to enjoy the moment. It wasn’t long before we were kissing and when Mark came up to say he was heading back to the hotel. Mary-Ann volunteered to take me back to the hotel before anything else could be said. Very good sign!

We didn’t stay at this bar much after my friend left and the ride back was even more amorous than the bar. Although I kept an air of dignity as we walked through the hotel lobby, well as much as you can keep stumbling in with a woman at two in the morning, but the same couldn’t be said for the elevator ride and short walk to my room.

The alcohol was really making the world swim around me and it took all my effort to focus on the matter at hand, and safely too. It was everything you can expect with a person you just met in a bar a few hours ago with the advantage of heavy petting for the last forty five minutes. I managed to stay awake and entertaining long enough for all to have a good time and actually found it comforting to fall asleep with Mary-Ann in my arms.

With a great night behind me, some major stress relieved, apparently one hundred dollars richer and a sexy woman at my side, life was looking really good at this point

The morning however, was going to be completely different matter.

Beware Martinis, Men and Money..........

2005-07-11T17:17:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-Two of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Didn't have the courage to switch on the news this morning, I wanted to live in ignorance of the weather outside my closed hotel curtains until the very last moment. Out of site, out of mind I figured and just a better attitude to start the day with. Day three of my business trip that had this Florida boy put in what felt like a frozen tundra when in reality it was simply a mild weather front.

The climate was teasingly mirroring my love life with the barren tree standing alone in the frozen field behind my hotel. Although its branches were bare the tree stood proud not because it wanted to, but because it had no choice. Its very existence wasn't from preference but the winds of life dropping the seed on that spot all those years ago.

My meetings were what they were nothing more nothing less. I made calls to Miss PP, TP and the Italian I'd been emailing the last few days.

The calls to the other two were of the usual flavor with Miss PP offhand and complaining, TP sexy and seductive peppering innuendo throughout the conversation. The Italian on the other hand disappointed me with her strong New York accent but I did enjoy that she had as much energy on the phone as were in her emails. Explaining that she had caught me at dinner I promised to call later, not knowing that the night had other plans in store.

My two colleagues are both married and we all get along amazing well considering our ages were fifteen years apart. They always loved listening to my adventures in dating and little did I know they were itching to see one unfold before their eyes.

We'd retired to the restaurants chic bar after dinner, the experimenting with different Martinis making us more buoyant and girl watching keeping us entertained. Eventually they picked out some girls and wanted me to go over and bring them back. That’s right, meet Lucky Guy the big game hunter, as long as the prey is of the female variety. Normally I don’t perform my circus act on cue nor with an audience, but the girls they picked out were incredibly cute, but noticed I said ‘girls’. There were two of them, single and equally on the prowl and only one single guy in my crowd. For those not keeping track, that one person would be me. Maybe it was the martini’s in my head that was screwing up the maths, or just an itching I had to break this rut that had become a chasm in my love-life, either way I jumped up and walked into the lionesses den with no fear. The opening comments to get the conversation flowing went well and everything was on track to be fun and flirty, that is until the girls found out the other two in our group were married. They were very nice, but eventually the girls went back to their seats, and who could blame them.

Now one of the reason I enjoy hanging out with happily married men (the ‘happily’ is a very important part) is so much of the night is spent having fun and not always chasing women for the sole purpose to sleep with them. Tonight was no exception. We had more fun talking about the girls coming over and the time they spent with us than we did during the actual event. Different takes, would’ve been scenario’s and thoughts taken off into wacky tangents. It was all hilarious. One of these funny remarks caused me to spit out some of my drink as I laughed which prompted napkins to be delivered by our very cute (very married) bartender from an older lady across the bar. All of us exchanged a few niceties, but she really wasn't my type and although the others kept the conversation going with her for a few more sentences soon it was just the guys talking among ourselves.

Then it happened. My older friend David got that mischievous grin on his face which always told me the next thing from him was nothing but trouble.

"Hey man, I think she digs you!" he said as head nodding with excitement, "Go over there and work your magic!"

I declined pointing out that not only was she not my type, but I didn't need them bringing this story up five years from now saying I was a dog, I’d sleep with anything that moved, etc, etc, etc. Now Mark the younger guy chirped in with his encouragement, come begging.

Nodding his head David was not letting this go. "Why don't we make it interesting, the first one to have carnal knowledge of a woman.." We all laughed at him mimicking the infamous line from Top Gun.

"With a woman this time!" Mark joined in, bringing the scene to life.

David laughed and continued, "I will pay you ten dollars." He slapped his hand on the bar as if to seal the deal.

"I'll pay you ten as well." David offered.

"No way am I sleeping with her for twenty dollars. Who do you think I am?" I couldn't believe my ears. "Anyway you two will make fun of me for years if I did this."

"No, no man," David shook his head with sincerity, "Your legend will just grow. You would truly be the man!"

"I don't do it that way! Besides she smokes. You guys know I hate that."

"We'll pay you twenty five dollars each!" Mark exclaimed. Were they not listening to me? I shook my head laughing and feeling all the alcohol starting to hit me especially since I was getting a little tempted by what was going on. I could enjoy this womans pleasure, not get teased and maybe get some spare cash? Apart from the obvious of being a complete and unfeeling dog, there was no argument against it.

"Fifty dollars each if you can go over there and get her to have sex with you tonight!" David’s eyes opened wide as he made the offer. The laughter was disappearing as a serious tone set in.

I looked at them in disbelief. I couldn’t believe they were serious about this. I looked down and tried to count the drinks we had. Surely not enough to have this kind of conversation?

I was still questioning everything, the drinks, the intentions and of course the possibilities. "You want me to go over there and have her sleep with me tonight?" I asked, "and you will pay me ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS to do that." I over emphasized the words to make sure we were all aware this had gone from a joke to a serious wager.

"Yes sir." David replied with Mark nodding along.

"And you won’t tease me about being a dog?" I was looking for the catch in the deal. My buzzed brain reassured my ego that the money was mine if I wanted it.

"I'm telling you, the legend would be beyond belief" he was grinning ear to ear. "You would be the man!" His fingers stabbed in air just before me, his body language exaggerating every argument he made.

I guess it was true, you could take the boy out of the fraternity, but the fraternity would always be in the boy.

I stood up and puffed out my chest.

"Okay, wait here."

I was on autopilot as I walked over to the older, but pretty woman who appeared happier as I approached.

Continued next time.

And I left paradise for this?

2005-07-09T13:36:00.000-04:00

Day Forty-One of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

The second day of the business trip that took me away from my tropical paradise known as home found me in a slightly better mood, but certainly no thanks to the weather. I was in a state further north which wasn't exactly renowned for its sunshine, there wasn't even a beach in site. As if the state wanted to prove to me that it could get colder than the last time I visited, a weather front brought freezing fog and rain making it simply miserable. My poor frozen feet burrowed deep in the thin hotel sheets reminded me of exactly how cold it was, leaving me convinced that the blankets were still cold from the early part of last evening. Indeed I don't seem to remember my toes ever coming to life the whole trip.

Being on a business trip limits what I can do with my love life since there are meetings mostly all day and what few breaks come up are used for making and returning business calls. AA reminded that I can still receive them though with a rather firm text message this morning. Taking me back to my high school years she was asking for forgiveness, asking for another chance. But it wasn't a matter of if AA and I would break up but when. As beautiful as she was, as clever as she could be, her abrupt manner left me cold. I know some would enjoy her frankness and probably describe it as refreshing honesty but I saw it as being undiplomatic at best and just downright rude at it's worst. It seemed that every time I turned around she was criticizing my clothes, shoes and even being over-critical of my religion.

As for Miss PP, I did have the chance to speak with her throughout the day and she was so sweet as to come out of meeting that her boss attending to take one of the calls. But for some reason even with all this attention and effort it never feels like we're getting closer. Case in point. I also spoke to TP a few times, though not as many times and certainly not at the same length as Miss PP. Later in the day an urge came to text TP telling her it was nice hearing her voice again and I got the sweetest reply thanking me for the thoughtful message and it had a few kisses on the bottom!

Now with Miss PP, I sent out a text message saying exactly the same thing in the evening but never got a response. Later when I called her from my room I asked if she got my message earlier.

"Oh yeah, that was nice. Thank you." she said. A reply that only Miss PP could give, that was prompted and casually indifferent.

Had a chance to check my emails and send out a reply to Little Italy, the sassy and vivacious lady proud of her Italian heritage. Read a few emails from some others but between my cold feet and just being tired from the busy day, I didn't have the motivation to write.

After all, a young lady wrote back that it presumptious of me to mention in my email that we had in common the hesitation about having children. This is fine except she wrote she wasn't sure about having children in her ad. Okay then.

Two others were upset that I didn't reply to their emails within the hour of them writing. Nice of them to let me knw they were high maintenance before I even take the out, don't you think?

Maybe tomorrow I'll have the energy to deal with these types of people.

Then again, maybe not

Two days in a row...I sense a pattern here!

2005-07-08T16:59:00.000-04:00

Day Forty of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Before this entry is read a quick check should be made of the weather outside. Is it dreary outside? Well it is in here.

By all accounts it should be an exciting time full of awe and interest with a four-day business trip with a great group of colleagues. But as I headed out it was with more anxiety than anticipation from everything that was going on in my love life as well as what could happen to same love life. A quick scan of the last few entries and it’s apparent that I’m not really happy about Miss PP, all my frustrations seemingly summed up in the last few agonizing days we spent together. Even with the apparent pre-requisite of at least three girls in my life at any one given time doesn’t help matters, if anything only proves to magnify the little pieces missing from each to make that near perfect romantic partner in crime.

Understanding that none of the omissions or faults from either Miss PP or the other less entrenched ladies are glaring or as obvious as say, bad breath. But like a composer looking to write the ultimate symphony, something always seemed to be missing in that sea of harmonious sound. Just as it’s hard to disprove a negative, it’s also nearly impossible to put a finger on exactly what ominously clouds the possibility of a relationship. Today certainly wasn't the day I'd want to play 'Let’s line up Luckiest Guys lovers'. Without a doubt I've been fortunate to have two or three ladies in my life at any given time, but the relationship question of quantity over quality constantly comes to mind. For instance if we were to play that game at this point with a quality qualifier what would we have?

AA
I’m sure she’s not completely happy with the little disappearing act I recently pulled in order to spend that ‘quality’ time with Miss PP I needed to see where we were with each other. I do know AA has the sexiest appearance of any woman I’ve known and as much as I find self-confidence a turn on, the opinionated way our conversations flowed lately is starting to make even the most intimate thoughts of us being together incredibly unappealing. Maybe she sensed this, or the mini vacation apart had an effect on AA since the last few conversations we had as I headed out to the airport made me feel a little better and certainly in less of a rush to break up.

TP
Our magical night stayed with both us for the following few days, but like AA I could tell she was a little annoyed at me disappearing over the last few days. After a few phone conversations she certainly does seem to be warming up and we’re both talking excitedly about our dates when I get back in town.

Miss PP
Ah, the greatest mystery of that most mysterious breed known as women. If I try to text or call her I only seem to get frustration in return as her responsiveness is driven by mood, the aligning of planets and seemingly the direction of the wind. I can’t think that I’ve ever met a woman who is so closed about her feelings and so lacking in physical passion. Well, one that’s breathing anyway.

You would think with such great women in my life I should be ecstatic and on cloud nine. But the reality of having three women in your life and none of them expected to make it beyond the next couple of weeks leaves a slight taste of disappointment. For those that haven't had the pleasure of this delicacy I can tell you that it’s quite tart, bordering on bitter and seems to linger on the palette. I’m sure this darker mood isn’t helped along by being at the original happiest place on earth, the airport. The emotions that run through the air at an airport can be easily associated to the strongest part of a relationship. Whether it’s the joy of picking up your loved one you've longingly missed or the tearful goodbye of dropping off that special person in your life for the trip that’s going to take them away from you, the airport witnesses the more passionate emotions brought out in the most public displays.

The dark emotional clouds started to gather last night so it was probably more out of disappointment than need that I found myself making my way through pages of online ads, answering the ones that had caught my eye. As I stood in the airport with the happy traveling couples around me, my colleagues on the phones to their loved ones, the thought of having some replies made me get out my cellphone to check my email.

Nothing.

I had written to the various ladies last night at around 9ish and surely if they were interested I would’ve received a reply by the following afternoon. Life had given an unsolicted answer to an unasked question. What’s worse than having three women in your life that are relationship dead-ends? Having no one wanting to be part of your life at all!

We all sat together on the plane and a wacky, non-linear conversation grew funnier, if not more bizarre the longer it continued. Things were sad, inferred and understood that can only be said among your semi-closest friends that you just happen to work with. Consequently, my frame of mind has brightened by the time we finally got to the hotel and even more so when I checked my email.

I had a reply!

Her profile was that of a fun and gregarious person who loved to love life. With dark hair and completions her olive skin added to the happy aura that seemed to surround her slim to average build. Beauty is a tough thing to tell from pictures, as I’m sure we’ve all known ugly people who take great pictures, cute ones that couldn’t take a nice picture if their lives depended on it and of course the people who have such an awesome personality their average looks become ravishing.

The way her response was written it was obvious she was proud of her Italian heritage. Like her profile, it was vivacious and sassy and you could feel her smile as she wrote it. Even though it was late I sent a reply trying match her breezy and colorful writing style and keep the flavor of ‘life be damned where are the good times’ she had created.

It was a long day that had left me with an equally long face, but my optimism was starting to break through and I told myself this trip was an opportunity to collect my thoughts and look for some kind of inspiration.

One can only hope.

Finally........time to post!

2005-07-07T12:56:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Nine of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It was a Dickens start to the day with it being the best of times and the worst of times. Next to me as I opened my eyes to the world was the beautiful AA. Her smooth curved flesh wrapped and mingled with mine as I enjoyed the closeness as well as her physical warmth.

Although last night was less physical than other times we had spent together the tenderness and affection was more than could be expected or hoped. Sadly the same could be said about her directness, but rather than repeat the surprising comments the story can be found in yesterday’s original entry.

As nice as it would be to lay there all day enjoying the feel of each others bodies intertwined, it was a work day and she had brought her things so she could go straight to work. This wasn’t discussed, more assumed, confidently and quietly. I’ve written before about the enjoyment I get from watching a lady get ready, either for work or for a night on the town. This morning it was AA’s turn to watch me get ready for work and just a I was feeling the warm glow from cuteness of the whole situation, a nasty reminder of how abrupt and insensitive she could really be vanishing any romance from the air.

“Are those the shoes you wear to work?” she asked, with the tone of her voice pointing to what she considered the correct answer.

I smiled a warm diplomatic smile, “Yeah. I like the clean and classical look.” I said with a tone mocking a gay fashion advisor. She didn’t smile.

She pressed on with her assault. “Those are so out of style. Doesn’t your boss complain about you wearing those kinds of shoes? What do your customers say?”

“Actually I’m considered one the better dressed executives at my office.” Although pleasant my inflection was obviously forced. It was too early to have this kind of abrasive confrontation and was made even more difficult with my perplexity.

“My nickname is ‘GQ’ actually,” I continued, “well the one I would use in mixed company anyway.” I didn’t need to start my day like this and hoped my well intentioned humor would defuse the conversation and we could move onto something else. But with AA that would probably be a discussion on religion or abortion, perfect breakfast banter.

“Well I don’t know who gave that nickname to you.” She rolled over in the bed, “You’re so out of date.”

“We all have our cross to bear.” I walked out of the bedroom and shut the door behind me as I entered the bathroom. By the time we swapped rooms and were both ready to face the world the topic had moved onto to weather, our day and any future plans. Needless to say any enthusiasm I had for the latter had been driven out by the charming fashion tips earlier.

My endearment of AA was quickly disappearing.

Called TP from work and she was still smiling from our time together the night before last. It was like a breath of fresh conversation talking to her. In complete contrast to my start of the day diatribe, our conversation was light, flirty and full of sexual teasing. TP always seemed to be happy to hear from me and we clicked at the most basic level. Her ex husband was taking the children all weekend and she really wanted to get together. I agreed knowing that Miss PP was back in town and although we had nowhere the chemistry that TP and I had, it was more or less assumed that Miss PP and I spent the weekends together.

Well this was under normal circumstances, which is a phrase used quite liberally with anything to do with Miss PP and I. As I mentioned before we were (or so I thought) broken up. Even though she was out of town we spoke on the phone nearly nightly. Bearing in mind I don't hate the woman, in fact I have quite strong feelings for her otherwise I guess I wouldn't have such frustrations with her! During these conversations she asked if I could pick her up and maybe we could talk about 'us' a little bit more.

How could I say no?

Knowing all of this when I was talking with TP, my moral fiber was letting me know it’s a horrible feeling to make a false promise, or even a date that may be difficult to keep at best, but the alternative of say, telling the truth really isn’t an option. The habit of multi-tasking is well and truly embedded in the casual dating world and anyone telling you otherwise is wither not good-looking enough to have more than one soon to be boyfriend/girlfriend, or is just lying. Regardless, I don’t feel good when I have to do it and wound up ending the conversation hoping to call her later.

Another fib.

Those old familiar feelings started stirring inside as I stood outside the gates in the airport, flowers in hand waiting for Miss PP’s plane to get in. As I easily picked her out of the mass of travelers tiredly making their way out of the causeway I was struck by how beautiful she was. Was I drawn to her aesthetic beauty or were my feelings for her so strong that my heart was looking beyond the physical and into her soul? If that were the case, I shouldn’t be able to even look at another woman, let alone be intimate with them.

My heart would skip a beat whenever I saw her after she had been away, and I always kissed and held her close as we waited for her luggage to make its grand appearance on that conveyer belt that winded it’s way around the baggage claim area. She would lean into me, burying her head in shoulder or pushing her body close into mine. Slight affection with no sexual tension. Like low fat chocolate that has no taste. The ice cream looks like the rich creamy desert you’ve come to know and love, with all those luscious memories building an expectation in your mind. But it’s barely an instant after the ice cream touches your lips that you realize this isn’t what you thought it was going to be. Far from it. It may be cold, may even be colorful but it doesn’t have the richness and the taste that you know it should. You can have it, but do you really want to.

This is Miss PP. My low fat ice cream!

Yes there is someone here:)

2005-06-02T12:37:00.000-04:00

From one blog to another
I was quite pleased to see that Lucky and Interesting Life has been linked to from a blog devoted to hints, help and articles on dating. Not sure if these adventures we’ve all shared in are the how to or definite don’ts, but either way it’s nice to be noticed. I actually enjoyed the blog too!

Check out A Singular man. It's good!

Interlude
Missing in action or just in the thick of it?

I’ve missed so many weeks of posting but there has to be a wonder of what should come first? To live the life then talk about it, or to make sure the blog is kept current and possibly miss out on an evening of fun and frivolity with the fairer sex?

There have been many things going on in my life distracting me from more prompt posts but certainly making for exceedingly interesting ones further down the road. In some ways the strides taken to reach that utopia of the happy and content relationship takes me even further into a world of comedic missteps and emotional journeys.

But now where did we leave off the many adventures of a lucky and interesting life?

Too many women and so little energy

2005-06-02T12:23:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Eight of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

I left TP’s house in the early hours after an entire night of touching, kissing, caressing and of course making love. I can’t seem to remember a moment of sleep. If it weren’t for her children being dropped off at the house by the ex in the morning, we probably would’ve both taken the day off. After all, with so much entertainment right there, who needs to leave the bed?

I went through my day with a smile on my face that made it apparent to even those who didn’t know me that something good was happening in my life. The smile was encouraged by the text messages and emails TP and I shot back and forth. Either she was brazenly smitten or her school didn’t seem to mind more personal details being included on messages from their email system. When things got a little too heated in the emails, I regretfully had to remind her that I wasn’t as fortunate as her and my company screened the traffic with a fine tooth filtered comb. The intensity in her emails and leaping from my screen made me want her in the same room with me and it didn’t matter which room, office or classroom since my body ached to ravish her all over again. It had been so long since I felt this animal passion with anyone and to have it with a smart, funny and of course beautiful person just made it that much more exciting.

With all of these thoughts and feelings swirling around my head and playing games with my loins it was nearly lost on me that I’d made plans to see AA tonight. She was coming to my place straight from work and I thought it would be nice to go out and play the parts of a proper couple experiencing a dining pleasure instead of staying in like we had the last few times. Of course this romantic thought was planned before my rambunctious romp with TP and not only was I physically a little tired from the all night affair but obviously distracted from the new found feelings.

Although I called AA with every intention of canceling the date, the enthusiasm in her voice melted away any resolve to do the dirty deed.

The knock came at the door around 6ish and as much as my mind was awash with TP, as the door opened I immediately remembered why I liked AA so much. Her tight black pants and equally tight top wrapped around those delicious curves of hers that just didn’t seem to stop. Her eyes twinkled only like a woman who’s falling in love can. To think when I first met her, she seemed so abrupt and impersonal, but now when I look at her I hear the bedroom giggles and feel the gentle kisses in my mind. Funny how a few dates, a little intimacy and some mind-blowing sex will do that to you. Maybe there’s ground for a scientific study here?

Two questions: How do we get the funding and where do I sign up?

I was lucky enough to watch AA get ready for our date and although I gazed on with hidden enthusiasm it occurred to me that there were two sides to this coin. The woman’s ritual of getting ready to go out is a performance art that betters the best opera or most well written play. She sits before the mirror with the array of bottles and jars with the concoctions to look smoother, smell sweeter and become more exotic. As you enjoy each purposeful application, it’s apparent that what is being witnessed is years of practice and perfection. It’s as erotic as it is fascinating.

The downside of seeing this work of art in progress is that you can’t be dazzled with the completed piece. The amazement and thrill of seeing your date in all her glory and perfection when picking her up for the date as she opens her door, making the grand appearance.

Regardless, it seems I should be thankful to be there at any point and there is the final satisfaction of having this beautiful work of nature’s art on your arm for the evening.

I did notice that AA was wearing a very nice white blouse with her jeans along with some very sexy black high heeled ankle boots. Knowing what stage she seemed to be at with our relationship I picked out and put on a casually nice white shirt, wore my blue jeans and black suede shoes. We matched, and she loved it. She thought it was adorable. You can see the magic in her eyes in the picture we took of ourselves before going out.

We had dinner by the intercoastal at a very popular restaurant and were lucky enough to actually sit next to the water. With the moon hanging in a clear sky with only the occasional cloud passing by, the Florida night had only a slight chill. Of course for many parts of the country it would be a warm night but with the thin blood shared by most Floridians, we tend to feel the cold when its really not even there, but just the inference of an absent sun and no humidity bringing on the goosebumps.

With the comfortable conversation, calm night and a few glasses of wine my body was starting to slow down. I couldn’t let AA know I was tired from having made love to another woman all the previous night and I tried to keep the conversation and appearance of enthusiasm going as best as I could. A nice meal, desert and coffee found us back at my place with a look of anticipation in her eyes as she headed towards the bathroom to ‘get ready’ for bed.

She emerged with a body ready for love, a cute one-piece lingerie to encourage it but a look on her face to scare away any thought of it.

“I thought you were supposed to be romantic?” She pouted, “There are no candles or music. There’s no mood!”

You’re lucky I’m still awake, I thought. “I’ll go get the candles right now.” I said as I put on my best ‘the customer is always right’ smile.

“No, No. It’s too late now. It doesn’t matter.” Her voice trailed off with obvious disappointment as she crawled into bed.

The night was nice and I did manage to make a good, although not necessarily great appearance for the night. There weren’t going to be any second or third encores for this show but everything was certainly done with feeling, special attention given to the area of affection since this is certainly less physically demanding and always leads directly to sleep. It was the latter that was my goal for the night as I began to realize that I wasn’t twenty-five anymore.

Then again, I never had the kind of fun I’d had over the last few months at twenty-five, so it’s all relative!

Great events are born from moments of mediocrity

2005-05-17T09:14:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Seven of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Out of all the questions my married or otherwise attached friends ask, the hardest one to answer would be “What’s the difference between a good and bad date?” Besides the obvious throw-away answer of ‘chemistry’ normally given to avoid any great thought on the matter, the true response is varied and much deeper than the disceptive simplicity of the question itself.

Once you start to realize how truly perplexing the question really is, an actual date which is so phenomenal that you’ll want to bottle, freeze dry and preserve every cute word spoken, flirtatious touch made and smoldering glance given throughout the night, the answer becomes daunting.

Tonight’s date with TP was in fact one of those rare aligning of the stars, giving a perfect specimen of the ideal date. A much needed response to possibly the most difficult question of them all.

Maybe the perfect date needs some uncertainty going into it? With TP never revealing her telephone number leaving me at her mercy for when we could have our enticing conversations, there was an air of mystery that seemed to heighten expectations and leave a cautious concern. This was no more apparent than when I turned up at the restaurant we agreed to meet at which was close to her house, nice but casual and with good food but not obscenely expensive. Only one problem, there was no TP.

Helpful Hint
With first dates I’ve found it better to leave my cellphone in the car since there should be no call more important that the person I’ve made all this effort and put aside all this time to meet. Besides, no matter how well you handle ignoring any incoming calls, you can never look good trying. All the calls could be from your sweet grandmother, the Salvation Army thanking you for the generous donation or an elderly neighbor confirming she got the groceries you left on her doorstep but all your date will think is that you’re some kind of Casanova or player avoiding the girls you’ve met before her. The competition! This doesn’t even start to consider what your date is going to think when she tries to call you in the very near future, only to get your voicemail. ‘I’m just like one of those floosies he was avoiding when we went out to dinner that night!’ This’ll be her damning thoughts undoing all the charm, finesse and brownie points you managed to earn thus far.

So as I walked around the people waiting for a table and through the bar looking at the different faces for some vague resemblance to the pictures I’d seen of TP, or even someone giving me an indication that they recognized me, I drew a blank on both accounts. I started to curse myself for not bringing my phone in, but realized before I’d even taken two steps out of the restaurant that I had no number to call anyway! Was it disappointment that was bringing up these strong emotions or just the unusual feeling of helplessness? I was still trying to work out the next step as I re-entered the bar area of the restaurant when a woman appeared out of the crowd, magically parting the sea of people holding their drinks and milling around. This was obviously TP and most definitely much prettier and certainly more striking than her photographs.

Her nervousness disguised any readable enthusiasm as we started to shake hands. Using our handshake and a gentle politely placed hand on her hip I pulled her in to give an innocent kiss on the check. Not only did this feel natural but I saw her smile grow as the whole thing evolved, so it seemed the effort to establish my confidence (which women of course love) also helped to break that momentary awkwardness of meeting in person for the first time.

I had already put our names in for a table and even with time taken searching for each other, we still had about forty minutes before being seated so we found a place at the bar and both ordered white wines.

Looking back I can honestly say that there was only polite conversation being made and my instincts were telling me that this would be a nice dinner with a beautiful woman but no sparks. Where most men would be disappointed with this outlook, I find it a spectacular way to spend an evening. A woman should be considered an ever evolving work of art. The way she moves, speaks and interacts with everything around her is something to relax and enjoy. The flick of her hair, verbal habits and even playing with her napkin or wine glass is all like watching a performance put on for an audience of one. Maybe this is why I’ve never had many terrible dates since I see so much enjoyment out just being with the fairer sex. I’m sure that many bland meetings have gone onto become more intimate affairs because of the very attention I’ll give as I watch and enjoy the art of conversation.

We covered familiar ground and we both knew by our body language that this wasn’t the first time we had told the same stories and gave the brief overview of who we were and what we did. When she mentioned that she was a teacher at a private school, I was even more disappointed there was no sparkle between us. Whether it’s the profession or the people who chose it, they always seem to be more open-minded types and are certainly more fun when it comes to those more ‘intimate’ activities. You can keep the librarians; I'll stick with the English teachers if you don’t mind.

Before we knew it, we were being seated at our booth, the kind large enough for a party of six. I’d mentioned my thoughts and what can be gathered from how a couple seats themselves at something this large in a previous post. Needless to say when she expressly chose to sit across from me, my original thoughts of it simply being an evening of enjoying a beautiful woman’s company were just confirmed further.

But then something happened on the way to desert. I couldn’t actual place it to an event, phrase or even a flirtation but a magical realization came over the table and seemingly over both of us at the same time that we were indeed attracted to one another. Not just mildly, but deeper and much stronger underlying feeling that could be expected on a first date. At least, I knew I felt it and there certainly appeared to be a twinkle in TP’s eyes that made me suspect she was feeling the same. But what to do about it? Neither of us wanted the night to end, but the part of town we were in only had family restaurants for entertainment.

Then it struck me. Bowling!

At first TP was perplexed with my suggestion of heading a few miles down the road to a popular bowling alley. It wasn’t the first thought that comes to mind on a first date and this particular location wasn’t the most impressive, but who could say no to bowling? Not only did she warm up to the idea really quickly but she also felt comfortable enough for us ride together in my car. Two good signs for the date.

From this point on the date went into that wonderful comfortable area where you can start to relax and feel like you are being more you. How you not be relaxed bowling? You’re wearing those goofy bowling shoes that were obviously designed by someone who was either color-blind or just blind, period. She introduced the first kiss by betting that I couldn’t get two strikes in a row. I guess the gods of love have more than arrows in their arsenal since this night was one of the few nights that strikes came to me quicker than a quick comeback.

Soon, however the bets weren’t needed to justify the kisses and the hardest part was controlling ourselves in the middle of a bowling alley with young teenagers and a watchful management all around us. We could both feel the kissers getting deeper and lingering a little longer, and as much as we both enjoyed it, there was certainly a feeling of questioning caution.

As with the dinner, the bowling went by too quickly and we were getting closer to when we should say goodnight. We’d left her car at the restaurant and it when was she was getting in it, I heard the words every man hopes for. Would I like to come back to her house for a coffee? Just a quick one mind you, because we both had to be up early in the morning.

Who could say no?

Her house reminded me of my childhood home and I guess it was no coincidence that like my mother she too was raising three children practically on her own. There’s something about the furniture, decorations and the very feel of that kind of house with some much love but very little money. It was interesting that I had finally met someone I easily felt so comfortable with and life was putting me in surroundings to further the warm feeling.

Just as we didn’t need any bets on the bowling, we didn’t need the coffee at her house to start the kissing again. Like the classic stories of Sunday bible class one thing begat another and before you knew it clothes were being tugged at to reach those more erogenous areas that were aching to be kissed. TP pulled back and as I watched her lips start to form the words I thought surely she would be suggesting we slow down reminding both of us that this was only her first date. Instead, I watched as she verbally stumbled about explaining that this normally never ever happens, but there seemed to be something special happening. This encouragement sounded even better when she mentioned that maybe we should go and lay down on her bed, but simply for comfort and no other more lurid reason.

Don’t ask me what I’ve done to deserve such a lucky life.

There really isn’t much I need to write since I’m sure you’ve already jumped ahead and assumed what happened next, and you would be right. Unfortunately I’m not clever or articulate enough to put into words how easily our two bodies flowed together to become one. How every movement seemed like a perfectly pre-planned and so well rehearsed dance, choreographed to the slightest detail. Although the passion gave obvious witness that we had never experienced each other before, the ease in which everything came contradicted the obvious intensities.

I left early the next morning knowing that we would see each other again. The afterglow of the nights activities was slightly diminished by the stark reminders of toys, crayon calendars and a refrigerator covered in progress reports that hinted at a less than easy courtship. TP was obviously an amazing woman but she came at an emotional price and an immense amount of responsibility.

But there were many layers to her and I had only gotten a hint of some of them.

And it started off so well?

2005-04-21T18:33:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Six of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

With a night of rest behind me and with the realization that I had more women interested in going out with me than there were nights available, I was actually starting to feel good about my dating life. But just as I was flush with my female follies I also knew my feelings were growing for AA, not to mention the confusion I had over Miss PP and our break up.

Of course all of this didn’t stop the emails coming or going with the online dating services. Attention from the ladies on the site was as overflowing even as the dates were filling up all my spare time. It’s easy to wonder if you’re missing or overlooking a quality person when making decisions on who to write or even which email warrants a reply! As cruel as this may initially sound, the overwhelming task of corresponding could quite literally take all your time if you allowed it, or just weren’t paying attention. I’ve sat down at my computer after work to write a few emails and found myself still trying to wrap up 'one more matter' as late as 9pm at night. One might think it polite to reply to every person who writes but doesn’t quite take your fancy, but it can quickly become a debate on why you should like them. Call me picky or even cynical but unlike Hollywood, I’ve never seen how great romances can start off with arguments and indifference.

But looking at something that started with a slow smolder and was quickly turning into a passionate affair, AA and I were burning through the various stages of intimacy and onto becoming a couple.

One of the key indicators that you’ve gone from dating to becoming a ‘couple’ is your level of comfort with each other. Admittedly, the older a person is and the further they are from coming out o that awkward stage of life where it feels as though the whole world is watching your every move, the easier it is for them to feel comfortable with the new dating ‘focus’ in their life. All the girls in their twenties that my friends would love me to date certainly haven’t found it yet, and it’s something the true women have in abundance. It’s confidence.

AA was no exception with enough for not only herself but with more to share if she possibly could. It was no surprise then that tonight seemed to happen with our planning and interactions liked a couple that had been together for ten years rather than the ten days we'd actually known each other. She came over after work and changed from her black sales uniform of tight top and pants to some even tighter fitting jeans and a tailored shirt that hugged her curvaceous chest. I was never sure what caught my eye quicker, her generous figure or those deep brown eyes that seems to say so much, but only if she let them and if you took the time to really look.

Knowing how to be incredibly cute and capture a moment just right, I wore a fitted white shirt and jeans that was similar to what she wore but different enough so we didn’t appearing sickingly sweet when we stood together.

AA loved it.

It was a wonderful night with fantastic conversation underlined by passion burning up in our stares and constant tasteful touching and stroking. This started from the moment we ordered some wine waiting for our table until I held the door open for when the valet brought my car up as we left. If you were to ask me what we spoke about, I couldn’t tell you. All I know is that it was engaging when it had to be and funny when we weren’t expecting it. Not an ounce of effort was given to something that seemed to feed itself without missing a beat or hearing a pause.

Outwardly, I was enthralled in her glances, comment and drawn to her touch. However, inside I was realizing there was a touch of guilt coming over me with the thought that this time tomorrow night I would be looking into the eyes of another, mentioning all the wonderful and interesting things I noticed about her. I just pushed to the back of my mind and fell into the moment again.

One of the first signs that not all the flowers were blooming and proudly as they should have in the garden of eternal bliss came when AA stepped out of the bathroom in some lingerie that would have be otherwise boring if not for her amazing body and even more incredible smile.

“Where are the candles and the music?” she asked, “I thought you were supposed to be this great romantic person?” Her voice was in that tone that was demanding but could still be said for humorous effect. I stared with a half-smile looking for a clue to how the question was really meant.

“You could have candles at the very least. Give us a romantic mood to make love in.” Now it was a statement and the intention were glaringly obvious.

“I’ll light the candles, wait right here.” I replied, trying to grow my smile while the dirty male in me absorbed the curves of her body’s every move as she pulled back the sheets in the one-piece white lingerie.

“No, no, no. Come to bed.” Her voice was calming down but the tone of disappointment only emphasized the situation even further.

We made love that night, but not with the ferocity of the previous times. My mood went from being embarrassed that I didn’t think of creating a more romantic atmosphere when I had the chance to annoyance that she should be so quick to correct me this early on in something that really wasn’t even a relationship.

Was a church calling its followers to mass at one in the morning or were the bells tolling in the far distance for someone I had just started to like?

What time is it kids???

2005-04-21T18:28:00.000-04:00

Time to go the E-Mail Bag!

Who’s been writing and who hasn’t? What is funny to say or just downright strange?

It actually seems as though AH is as genuine and sweet as her emails have made her out to be. My main concern was two-fold. Firstly, I’m always a little weary of people who won't give out their cellphone in this day and age. With caller ID and voicemail it seems that screening is so simple, and wouldn't the urge to find that one special person be so strong that it would seem like an obvious choice? The other worry is that her pictures are only of her face and although her description is athletic and toned, there is the potential of her being on the heavier side. Either way, she wants to talk on the phone later on in the week and there is something about her (beyond the latin card that gets Lucky Guys interest everytime) that makes me want to meet her.

A dark haired mother of two who goes from plain but cute to model-looks depending on which picture you choose wrote back and explained that the ages of her children are eight and ten years old. I’ve dated women with children before, but since I really want the next woman to be the one I spend the rest of my life with, do I want to have at least ten years of child-raising ahead of me. Then when I consider that she likes to go to church ‘often’, I’m getting the feeling this may not be what either of us are looking for.

A cute mortgage broker gave me her number and an even cuter blond asked me to email mine so we could talk. The broker is a short haired burnette that lives about forty minutes away and the blonde is closer, cuter but I think maybe slightly heavier. Both of them seem nice enough to talk to on the phone at the very least.

Finally a very cute blonde who’s emails started off fun, interesting and even racy at times started to send back replies that seemed forced and uninterested, so being a confident kind of person I asked her about this. She wrote me today with the simple response of “Sorry if I came off as not interested. That really was not the case. I wouldn't have written if I was not interested.”

That’s it. Nothing else.

I guess I won’t be writing back to her.

The calm before the storm?

2005-04-20T16:50:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Five of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It had been a busy past few days. Between being with AA in those closest, most possible physical way and trying to get as far away from Miss PP in every sense, I was physically and emotionally exhausted. With the few I'd clicked with in emails from the online dating services as well as the young ladies I had already taken out on dates, there were a lot of people I could've spent the night on the phone with. Instead I stayed in trying to relax, regroup and have some me time.

Oddly enough all those nights you came to dread of lying on the couch watching instantly forgettable television, somehow become magically appealing and get a whole new longing when you haven’t had two minutes alone over the last couple of weeks. I was so tired of the whole dating world and activities that I didn’t even go in and check my email on the different online dating sites.

And I agree, I never thought I would think those words either.

As if it had taken on a life of it’s own, my schedule was filling itself with familiar faces and new possibilities. I guess AA was very happy with us and what had happened recently as she wanted to get together not just once but two nights this week, with sleep-overs just assumed as a given. Who could have a problem with that sort of presumption?

After having a few more incredibly warm and flirtatious conversations with TP, but even with the comfortable banter going back and forth, she still didn’t want to give me her telephone number. This did strike me as a little strange, but she looked so great in her pictures I at least wanted to meet her in person before I officially gave her the seal of craziness! We decided to meet in a few days at a restaurant that was nice but not insanely expensive. It was set up as family dining but had the lights low enough to give it a romantic feel. The numerous booths around the dining area were mostly built for groups of four though there were a few made for two arbitrarily seating you across from one another.

Before everyone starts looking back through past posts I'll save you the time and acknowledge that there isn't a definitive or even teasing description of TP worth linking too. I have that on my 'to-do' list and get that written for you as soon as possible. I should say I'll try to produce a fitting description since this woman has so many sensual things about her that just one them would be enough to arouse any man. I could only hope that she was a fraction of her photos and promises penned in her profile.

Watch out! Another wacky theory from Lucky Guy!
I’ve always looked for signs on a date that fate either does or doesn't want me to be with this person. A bad table, service or food is always hangs a little ominously in my mind while biting into the best meal I’ve tasted for a while makes me feel better about everything. If you’re lucky enough as a couple to be seated at one of the larger booths built for four or more, a telling sign is where the young lady prefers you to sit. Although I'll admit it is more practical to sit across from each other for conversation purposes and certainly being able to look into each others eye’s, the more romantic and potentially affectionate position would be sitting next to each other on the same side. If she wants you to sit across from you there may not be any attraction or passion. But if she want you to sit next to her, then you're effectively on date number two or three depending on you dating confidence and compentency skills!

My friends have accused me of over-analyzing a situation or person, but I’ve always felt it’s better to try to learn and know things before they become too much of a surprise down the road. How many times have we all heard about the clueless person harassing someone they went out on a date with who obviously has no further interest in them?

You don’t have to get a clue of you’ve already come to a calculated conclusion.

It is after all quite elementary my dear dater.

I'm bored as hell and can't take it anymore!

2005-04-14T17:24:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Four of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It does make perfect sense that if we didn’t have slow days, how could we appreciate the more exciting ones? At least this is what I told myself all day as I waited for something to happen, for life to kick into a higher gear with something, anything to make the day feel worthwhile. I wanted to scream “Get me out of this mediocrity” in every public place I found myself. Matters certainly weren’t helped by my lackluster agenda, after all how much trouble can you get into with a shopping and a movie?

The movie was with a female friend who desperately needed someone to go with her to see ‘Phantom of the Opera’. It has to be understood that finding a woman who can be just your friend is probably a bigger challenge than finding someone to date. She has to be all the things you want from a potential partner, which would include being interesting enough to want to hang out with but she also must lack any kind of sexual chemistry that might take the two of you away from the role of friends. You may look for a girlfriend to be trustworthy, but a female friend has to have this quality at the top of her list and definitely in generous supply since one the mainstays of your conversations will be each others dating lives. This person will eventually know more about you, your habits (including the bad ones) and even your drawbacks more than most of the women you’ll ever date.

With such a rarity in your life, when she needs to do something or to go somewhere like a good neighbor, or even insurance company you'll need to be there. Hence I found myself rolling my eyes every time they broke into song (which was the entire movie) and slouched even further when the leading lady did obviously stupid things (which was the entire movie) at the Phantom of the Opera. Though I rarely leave a movie to take a call, I was expecting to hear from TP who felt more comfortable calling rather than giving me her number. So when a restricted number came up on my caller ID, it was the perfect opportunity to excuse myself and grab the call.

She had more of an accent than I thought she would. Well, let me clarify that. Her pictures gave her a latin look and since I do live in South Florida there may’ve been a subconscious thought that if there was any accent at all, it would be Spanish. So I was surprised when I heard a definite southern and maybe even Texan accent on the other end of the phone introducing herself as TP. Bearing mind her caution about giving out her telephone number she sounded more confident than I expected and we were both pleased that the conversation flowed incredibly comfortably. The only time either of us came close to being flustered is when she found out that I’d stepped out of a movie. I took the opportunity to ask for her number again, hoping the new-found ease we both obviously felt while talking would be enough to make her more comfortable about the idea, but no. She promised to call later so we could get to know each other a little better and pick a date to get together.

I’ll admit to a little bounce being in my stride as headed back into yet another song about yet another revelation in the French theater, and something tells me it didn’t involve any wardrobe malfunctions. That would be far too interesting.

As we walked out of the movie I do think my friend assumed my smile came from enjoying the movie and since you treat female friends like your girlfriends, whatever she needs to think to keep her happy was fine by me.

I didn’t get to enjoy the moment too long though. Just as I started my car to head home Miss PP called. We had been apart for most of the time she'd been in town and her call was to see me even if only for a few hours before flying out tomorrow. This would be the perfect time to have our 'break-up' conversation and apparently it would be over sushi. I considered this a lucky turn of events since there are no knives at the table when eating Sushi and the chopsticks don’t even come to a full point. Strangely enough, as I drove over to pick Miss PP up I reasoned that the amount of force it would take to drive a chopstick into my body would break it in half long before it went too deep and out of all the places to have a break-up conversation this has to be best choice. Why, they don’t even have many hot dishes or food, so there wasn’t even the danger of being scolded. If I could only get one of the waiters to have the break-up conversation itself, it would be an effortless evening!

I waited until three or four drinks into my second beer and for us to start picking at the Sushi before I brought the conversation around to questioning what we both wanted and how we saw our futures. She visible stiffened when the word future was said. Her eyes looked around the restaurant, at the different diners, everywhere but at me. The best way to describe what she said would be on how she said it. Babbling.

Like a young girl in her first awkward situation she nervously talked about different things, never finishing one single thought. Her job, a project she was working on, although we had been together all these months with the time spent away we've actually only been together a short while. There was more I’m sure, but it was mingled in with verbal distractions of unfinished sentences and the clearing of the throat along with the physical fidgeting and playing of food at the table, so it was difficult to keep track. All I know is out of all the things that was said, what should’ve been mentioned was unfortunately absent.

I didn’t hear how much she really cared about me, how much fun we’ve had since knowing each other or even that it would be nice if we were in each other’s future. The disappointment must’ve been obvious on my face but no mention was made or questions asked of what or how I felt about her response. In fact she only really got angry once, raising her voice and swearing like a trooper during which her soliloquy became quite indignant. She asked how I could doubt any of her feelings when she obviously liked me enough to spend time with me. Wasn’t that sufficient proof for me?

While all of this was going on, I paid the bill and we made our way back to her place where more of the same things were said, but thrown around in a different order and the phrasing changed enough to give it the appearance of a fresh thought or conversation. After a few minutes of silence she asked me if I wanted to stay. Mentally tired and wanting to give this woman that has come to mean so much to me the longest and biggest hug had me nodding my head.

We didn’t speak for the rest of the night, but simply held each other in her bed wondering what exactly was going on and trying to understand the next step.

I knew I shouldn’t have done the break-up in a restaurant!

Beginnings and Endings

2005-04-12T19:18:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Three of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

There is always that wonderful moment of waking up next to a person the morning after your first night of making love. The slow realization that what happened the night before as you take in the smell and feel of waking up with this woman you now know so much more intimately and are just that much closer too. Its as if every one of your senses are needed to take it all in, completely.

I’ve always liked to lay as close as I possibly can to the other person in bed, trying to have every part of my body touching every part of hers. With legs intertwined, my arms wrapped seemingly all the way around her body my face was buried deep in the back of her neck and having her hair hiding most of my features as it fell across me. Although I didn’t want to move a millimeter from that position, my fingers seemed to be tempted by her soft skin and generous curves and started to explore her body. This time, in the light of day I could watch my fingers as they traced and mapped the different parts of her body, finding the various blemishes and birthmarks we all have on our skin. Her little movements and heavier breathing told me that not only was she waking up, but she was getting aroused by my attention.

We made love again but this time with a confidence that can only come from being with someone for a second time. Knowing what excites them, how and where they liked to be touched. Morning sex has the innocence that can never be found in the nighttime activities that’s usually brought on my hours of flirting and maybe even more time drinking.

My biggest thrill after we made love was to watch her get dressed for work. One of the most erotic parts of a movie has to be the scene in ‘Fatal Attraction’ when Michael Douglas watches his movie-wife Ann Archer get ready to go out. He lays on the bed as she rubs on the oils, puts on her make-up and fixes her hair.

We agreed on having lunch over breakfast and I kissed her goodbye at the door.

Time to answer some emails.
Every so often I get an enthusiastic email from a blonde haired latin lady. She’s always fun, says some very nice things and is upset that I’ve never written back. Like clockwork I reply that I did in fact write back but never heard from her. Maybe she’s a bored rich housewife and this is her way of passing the time among the little people. Regardless, I don’t think I’ll write back this time.

AH and I swapped another set of emails and she explained that she travels to South America on family business. I don’t care how you try to write that, it never sounds good. My serious concern is that this would be another relationship like Miss PP where she’s out of town all the time. As much fun as it may seem to sleep with all the different women, I’m actually looking for that one, long-lasting serious relationship. No, it’s the truth! AH is a little hesitant about giving out her number just yet and would like to write for a few more emails until ‘she gets to know me better’.

TP asked for my number and would rather call me than give out her own. It’s hard to be annoyed with someone who showing good common sense. Plus, her pictures have her looking absolutely amazing!

Finally, the emails with a very pretty mortgage lender who lives about thirty minutes south of me are starting to get really interesting. She’s funny, asks great questions and seems genuinely interested. I wrote back and asked for her number. What can she say but no!

Back to the adventures!
AA had her son tonight and Miss PP was in town but had other plans so I went to my sister’s house for a home cooked meal and watching a DVD with my niece and nephew. I had come to the conclusion that it was time to actually make official what Miss PP and I had already become. Actually it was more what we had never achieved that was the problem.

All these months we've been seeing each other and she still never refers to me as her boyfriend and when she was away would never mention that I was missed. Being a person that puts a lot of weight on the physical side to a relationship, I always felt it was particularly telling that she would never initiate sex of any kind at any time. It was a combination of frustration with all of these matters and the fact that I knew by my various email correspondence that if I wanted to see some of the people interested in me from the online dating site, I would need some of the time that I use to be with Miss PP. I know the old saying of birds in hands and bushes, but enough was enough already. I felt like I'd been patient and even went against my male grain, trying to actually talk about the problems with her. How many blank looks was I supposed to be greeted with?

So it was while Frodo was trying to finish his journey with the ring by climbing the volcano that I decided I too would have to end this strange and bizarre journey Miss PP and I had undertaken. Our trip has been so confusing and weird that I was sure even Gandalf would’ve thrown down his staff in disgust and ended it much sooner than I had let it drag on.

Tomorrow it would be.

Thank you Thank you!!!

2005-04-12T02:10:00.000-04:00

I've mentioned it before, but today is the day that 'Lucky and Interesting Life' has been picked as 'The Blog of the Day'!

For the new readers, here are some highlights of the really juicy bits you missed!!!!

So in celebration, let's review what’s already been said and enjoy the stories again!Let's start at the beginning.

The rules and guidelines that were set for this blog way back in December when the whole idea of sharing was just a twinkle in my eye and a few bytes on my computer.It was certainly fun!

This story is one of my favorite ones from the past and it's written as it happened, blow by blow. I was picked up by a girl in a bar and used for sex. If every red-blooded male who reads this doesn't stand up to salute fate and everything it does for us...well there are certain personal items you just need to give up.

This story should be respected!
This one was very near and dear to my heart. I hope it's enjoyed but also given the understanding and respect it deserves. Of course the sex in the Jacuzzi was great!

Advice item #1
This was a great column about where and who you shouldn't date. Ignore this advice at your own risk.

Three women in one day?
Can a man fall into bed with three women in one day, purely by accident? I guess so. I couldn't believe it either! Part One, Two and Three.

Time for a moment of Deepness
A serious introspective of where we are with true love.

Another moment of Deepness
This should be taken seriously. Well maybe not! Some thoughts about Romantic Getaways.

Finally, finishing on a humorous note
A blog that sums up what being single really means in the everyday world.As you can see, a lot of good stuff. Might even be worthwhile reading all the entries just to catch up. I know this isn't the quickest blog to read, but it certainly is one of the more fun ones. I will never lie in these pages and just hope that you can enjoy reading about these adventures as much as I did in making them:)

Lucky Guy!

Is it love or just indigestion?

2005-04-12T02:09:00.000-04:00

Sometimes we need to boil things down to the most basics of basic. To have a man be totally honest and upfront without a threatening to take away sex or do bodily harm (and I suppose for the sadomasochistic among us those would be the one and the same) is very rare indeed.

Well, through various circumstances and a series of rather interesting events you have a man willing to discuss some no-holds barred, complete and thorough reasoning of truths.

Firstly, we have to bear in mind that the dating events on this blog aren't told in exact real time, while the commentaries and insights are written as they come to me. So anything that is said here may or may not have anything to do with whatever day the blog happens to be on ‘the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it’.

So here are my unguarded and sincere thoughts.

Through the entries in this blog, it’s apparent that I’ve had the pleasure of the company from many a women, most of them stunning and all of them most certainly interesting. Do these women appear at my door, naked and asked to be made love too? As desperately as I would like to have this reputation and as much as I would like for it to happen this way the answer is obviously no.

The events of complete intimacy are brought about by flirting, half-glances and clever conversation peppered with compliments, polite innuendos and seemingly innocent suggestions. They are all weaved together in an apparently random fashion that has the young lady thinking that she has no choice but to have sex. She convinces herself she needs to have sex. Indeed, she usually considers it a course of nature that simply must be followed. Now none of this is mentioned as a bragging point or a form of boasting, but to prove the intended point of this confession.

What happens when the instigator starts to believe the tale of sexual inevitability that they are telling? Is a man doomed when he actually falls for his own lines?

I have come across this phenomenon recently and found myself wondering at how genuine the words coming out of my mouth really are. They sound sincere enough, but why this feeling of long lost emotions that bring back the memories of high school romances? Or is that I’ve spoken the lines so many times that even I, the orator is starting to believe the story being spun?

Has the con man conned himself, or is love truly showing it’s face?

It could even be that I’m so tired of the game because it’s become too easy, or even maybe so challenging that I want to think this one is indeed the one.

Have I had one too many happy hours of uninspired casual conversations? How long can you talk about nothing to someone who will end up being a nobody in your life?

But recently, everything that was said flowed with a life of it's own. No need to fake sincerity for this conversation, every word was meant with old lines sounding fresh and genuine. Both of us as experienced as we were at the job of first dates felt the confidence wash away under deeper looks than seen before, letting that nervousness only uncertainty can bring.

Don’t misunderstand me, there are no engagement rings or plans of moving in together. Everything appears as casually as it should be to anyone looking in. We are talking about a deeper level of commitment, the availability of a heart, if not only slightly used and certainly mended after being broken a few times.

I would say that the main reason the seeds of doubt have manage to flourish in a normally desolate environment is the need for the next girl to be something more than a disappointment or mismatch that has you not wanting to call back. Is the hope that true love is just around the corner the aphrodisiac needed to smooth over any nooks and crannies in a person's character flaws that would normally condemn the potential relationship?

These are all rhetorical questions of course that will only be answered by time and my heart beating stronger for that ultimate feeling, or wallowing in it’s misery while the pleasures of the flesh are fulfilled by passing interests.

Interesting thoughts though.

AA meet Wink wink

2005-04-12T02:05:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Two of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. (Continued)

The room was flooded with the smells of furniture polish, Windex and lemon from the floor cleaner all mingling together, stirred up by the air conditioning circulating cool air. A slight sweat had broken out from trying to complete all the chores before I jumped in the shower to get ready for AA, who was coming over for dinner and a movie. By the time I had preened myself to perfection, or the closest I’d ever come to it, the fragrance from the candles carefully placed around the living room had started to overtake the raw, antiseptic and obvious smells of my frantic cleaning some forty-five minutes earlier. Having a clean place is paramount in the early stages of dating, but not letting them know it had only recently become that way was even more important. It’s the same as making a huge effort, but having it all appear as if everything was a near second thought. I was lucky in that I am naturally tidy, so I can bring a date home at any time and apart from a few magazines (Time, thank you very much) and remote controls strewn about the place looks pretty impressive.

I opened the wine to breathe and started to prepare the fish by the time she knocked on my door. I knew I’d genuinely missed her, but the site that met my eyes left me torn on whether to wrap my arms around her and try to touch and stroke every part of her body, or stand there in amazement with the silliest look on my face. As it was I did a combination of the two and it was nice to see that my silly look was only outdone by hers. As I continued to prepare our meal the evening was filled with kissing that seemed to take the level of passion up a few notches.

Needless to say, we didn’t make it all the way through the meal or the movie with excited bodies and deepened breathing leading to clothes being taken off and appropriate exploration ensuing. She was even more beautiful with her clothes off and she simply re-enforced my long held theory that any pre-birth woman can have a wonderful body, but for one who has born a child the perfect body is much more of an achievement. This was AA.

Every part of her was smooth and without flaws. Yes, she had some augmentation done to her breasts, but they were a wok of art with all sensitivity intact. Being a conscience mother, it had been a while since she felt the warmth of male flesh pressed against her and her body responded accordingly. Everything flowed together like one surging of rushing water making it’s way down an otherwise calm stream.

It was when I asked her to stay that I realized that wasn’t a large purse she had brought with her, but an overnight bag with everything she needed to go into work the next day. You have to love it when a woman just knows it’s time. Problem is, this is when all smart men realize that we are all but pawns in the women’s world. They decide when, where and how often (if at all actually) but are gracious enough to let the men think we had some say in the matter.

What women don’t understand is that once they do allow us to become very personal with them, that’s it, the conquest has been made and the men actually have the upper hand in the relationship.

If we're good enough in bed that is!

An evening of possibilites with AA......maybe

2005-04-08T17:50:00.000-04:00

Day Thirty Two of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

There were so many things to do on this first day back in town from my four-day business trip. Between catching up on the work that needed to be done before I left and all the things brought back with me, my professional schedule was full enough on it's own, but then consider the more urgent matters of my personal life and it was a to-do list the frighten the busiest of people. I could be crass and unbecoming and call it a ‘who to-do list’ but I would hope I’ve set the standard of this blog much higher than that. Well, maybe not.

Besides all the calls to be made and the dates that had been put off being arranged, the upcoming and very anticipated evening with AA was tonight. At her suggestion I was cooking dinner at my place and rented a movie. Although the passion on our previous dates didn’t have us ripping each others clothes off, the flirting of the last few days during my business trip gave my gut that warm, excited feeling that our relationship was going to be moving onto a more physical level.

Before I move onto the night with my exotic beauty (which practically describes most of the women I date, but that’s a whole different story) a quick review with who‘s around, being written too and seems interesting.

A beautiful blonde with a fourteen-year old daughter who thinks I’m incredibly cute. The catch? She still has her soon to ex-???? living with her. Although she said he’s going to move out, do I really want to get involved with something so messy?

Another very cute blonde that has written about three times now and although she says she interested in the emails, they never seem overly enthusiastic or ask many questions about me or even us getting together. Maybe she’s just a naturally laid back person with no passion for life, or anything for that matter. Once again, not exactly jumping to the top of the list to date.

A very beautiful, olive-skinned dark haired beauty we’ll call SH emailed her telephone number without even being asked. It seems she doesn’t want to stay on the dating site much longer and would rather not risk us losing touch. Promising.

Although it’s hard to tell what she looks like, a curly, raven haired girl has written for the third or fourth time. The problem? I’ve seen her on the service over the last few years and she’s always used the same blurry, shoulder and face picture. My instincts tell me no and with all that I have going on right now, why go against my gut feeling?

I’ve exchanged emails with a very pretty blonde who has yet to write anything that's too strange or worries me, and that in itself is making me wonder. The true question is, am I really this paranoid that if someone appears to be perfect they’re obviously not? Maybe I’m suffering from the “Why would I want to be with anyone who would to date me” paradox! I’ve asked for her number and we’ll see if the conversation stays as squeeky clean as the emails.

A lady we shall call TB gave me her number. She’s a cute latin lady in her mid thirties with no children and divorced about a year ago. Although she doesn’t appear to be head-turning beautiful her looks are so cute you would definitely notice her in a crowded coffee house. The cute smile warming up her corner of the room would certainly catch your eye. I’ll have to give her a call tomorrow.

Another latin beauty is asking some really nice questions and seems smart, funny and has the most amazing eyes. Her pictures are professional taken and show only her head and shoulders. Apart from being a little vague about what she does and how often she travels, everything else seems amazing. Although I prefer not to have endless email correspondence this might actually go somewhere and I’m more than willing to respect her wishes and wait a few more emails before we swap telephone numbers. AH really does have the most beautiful eyes.

Some other emails in various stages of the writing stages came in today, but since I really don’t see any of the ladies going much further because of some strange things they’ve written or asking endless and seemingly pointless questions, so I won’t go into detail here and bore you to the point of looking for another blog.

Finally, I did get a few ‘flirts’ or ‘winks’ from the online dating site and as I described before, this is a way for someone to let you know they’re interested. My more cynical side has always felt that they’re saying that I’m cute enough to wink too but not so much they want to waste their valuable time typing up an actual email. Both of them were slightly older women, but more sexy than many of the younger ladies on the site. I wrote to TP and FS thanking them for the winks, said some nice things about their profiles, asked a few questions and finished with the thought that I was really looking forward to hearing back from them. This could be interesting.

As you can see with the online dating, you get worried when you don’t have enough responses only to find yourself cursing the stream of emails that have to be answered with the clever quips that need to be typed when you do actually have some attention.

But speaking of attention, who needs all this cyber-flirting when the real thing is coming over to my place in just a few hours. Of course in that time I still need to do some cleaning, preparing of the food and making sure the mood is just right for a much anticipated evening with AA.

Never argue with a beautiful woman.

2005-03-30T23:26:00.000-05:00

Day Thirty One of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It didn't matter how late my morning started, Raven wouldn't come on duty at the hotel service counter until the early evening. Since I would be on the afternoon flight back to South Florida I knew our close encounter last night was the final meeting for this trip. Now this isn't to say that there wasn't a small part of me hoping one of the morning shift would become ill and the management would have to call Raven in to help with the staff shortage. Now understand that I wasn't wishing anything terribly painful on these poor people, just enough to keep them in bed so a tired but dutiful Raven would have to man the desk beautifully on the morning shift. At least long so I could see how our moment together last night had affected her anyway. Purely selfish I know, but still there without a doubt.

What can you say about traveling in these days of shoeless walks through metal detectors and then practically getting dressed while holding your boarding pass and drivers license clenched in your teeth, all the while trying to look as calm and sophisticated as you can. I arrived home in the late evening, too late and certainly too tired to really call anyone but AA to tell them I’d gotten back.

AA was very happy to have me back in town and we eagerly made plans to see each other the following night. Before I could give any idea's she mentioned that she thought I might be tired from all my traveling so maybe we could just stay in and watch movies. She even went as far as to suggest we do the movie-night at my place.

You don’t need a degree in seduction to know what the true intentions are behind the incredibley thin guise of concern. Being the red blooded male that had often fantasized about what was really behind those tight fitting clothes of hers, I didn’t need much convincing to agree with the idea of an intimate night at my place. Call me easy, but I consider it more just trying to get along.

Regardless of what emails I was reading or writing on any of the online services, the thought of having AA to myself in the more personalized atmosphere of my apartment left me with a smile on my face as I went to bed that night. Back in my mind however were the thoughts of where Raven was tonight and what was running through the deepest part of her mind, playing in the subconscious of her curiosities.

Reasons and Retrospectives

2005-03-30T18:20:00.000-05:00

The more regular readers may have noticed that the entries on Lucky and Interesting life were always regular, only missing two or three days at the most. But in the last month, the stories have only been added once every seven or eight days.

It certainly has been an interesting month. To use an old but certainly poignant phrase, ''It has been the best of times and the worst of times."

Between the things that have happened, their emotionally aftermath and the time they took, it all seemed to limit my ability and enthusiasm to tell the tales. Like everyone else who finds themselves at a place they never expected to be, I tried to retrace the steps and missteps that had brought me there. This is when I realized the beauty and even necessity of this blog and what it had become. This was a way to revisit events and as I watch them unfold, re-examine what I most likely missed while being caught up in everything as it was happening.

So, in the upcoming weeks there will be moments and people, on occasion even moments with people, that I would never think to be lucky enough to know or experience. But with these experiences and of course the women involved, came the curse of knowledge of what is actually out there. Or more importantly, what I may never have. I guess this is where the old adage of ‘be careful of the knowledge you seek’ would come into play.

The physical and emotional roller coaster that life involuntarily had me on, gripping the safety bar white knuckled and with all my might, seemed to have come at a prophetic time though. I was recently informed that this site was named Blog of the day for April 12th, none the less.

Maybe the writers of fate felt they were entering a sweeps week and an extreme soap opera was needed for the absolutely best ratings. Not to sound too unappreciative of the interesting and varied events over the last month, but a slight say or even preview of the script would've been hugely appreciated.

The very least that should be gained from the following stories over the next few weeks would be laughter for the humor, appreciation of the profound and a moment’s consideration given to life's lessons.

Fortunately, I did pack my dancing shoes for this trip!

2005-03-29T06:50:00.000-05:00

Day Thirty of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

With the good thing about my day of meetings and appointments being that they brought me closer to the time the night shift would be coming on duty at the hotel I was staying at, you have to know that my mind was on Raven. Actually, my thoughts were more about that look she gave me last night, or more importantly the one I didn’t quite catch when I glanced back just as I was getting on the elevator with my colleagues.

Was this really happening or was it just my imagination? Beautiful women are always being hit on regardless, but put them in front of a bunch of lonely men and the air is thick with flirting and not always so subtly. Whether they’re working at the desk of a hotel, the bar or even as a waitress in a restaurant it must truly feel as though a sign were hanging over their heads proclaiming they’ll sleep with anyone regardless of hair, age, looks or even marital status.

I replayed the events of last night hoping to know whether or not they were out of politeness or genuine attraction. If it was politeness then I would admire her from afar as I passed through the lobby on the way to bed. If she was genuinely interested I could still enjoy her platonic company with as many pleasant remarks as the walk from the hotel entrance to the elevator would allow. Or, I could dare to open the mouth of obvious flirting and hold back the snarling teeth of rejection as I bravely lowered my head into them. As Kramer once said on ‘Seinfeld’, “Let the dance begin.”

All of this ran through my mind in various different orders throughout the day and on over dinner. My colleagues even mentioned how distracted I seemed. I really couldn’t even come up with anything clever to say when we all got back that night to the lovely Raven who was standing on her stage, sexy smile and all. I looked over as we passed her counter in the hope to see some kind of disappointment that we didn’t have the chance to exchange cute conversational quips but the phone rang to be answered and had her helping a guest. Just as I was about to step on the elevator I changed my mind and stepped back, explaining to the others that I wanted to check my email on the computer in the Hotel Business Center which was located just around the corner on the first floor.

‘Let me deal with reality and people who are definitely interested.’ I thought. Well as interested as they can be with online dating sites anyway. Received an email from a lady I've seen before and I’ve always liked her profile but she only has one photo, at it's not particularly clear, nor flattering. It might be an idea to write and ask for more pictures, but how to ask without the appearance of shallowness. Also got a few flirts, teases or winks depending on what each site called the quick-click option of letting someone know you’re interested, but not so much that you want to take enough time out of your obviously busy schedule to write a proper email of course. I was going to write back to some of these ladies and even some others I’d found while looking at the teases, but for a reason known as Raven, I just didn’t have the enthusiasm for it.

I was about to head up to my room on the fourth floor when I remembered running out of Excedrin, an absolute necessity to waking up with a clear head after a night of even the mildest of drinking. They did have a mini-store located right next to the check-in desk. Raven’s Check-in desk. My brain had exhausted itself with the analyzing and dissecting of this whole would-be-affair and it refused to reason one more thought. I instinctively headed over the store to get my Excedrin willing to throw my mentally limp body to the mercy of the Gods of Love and Lust.

As forward as I can be, sometimes that shy eleven year old boy makes a guest appearance as he did at the moment I walked past Raven shuffling papers behind the tall counter. I could only manage to make a weak smile with a slight nod to acknowledge her and it even felt like my pace quicken ever so slightly too. Desperately trying to hide my embarrassment brought on by my shyness, my eyes raced over the shelves looking for the medication section. I heard the click of heels as Raven walked around somewhere behind me with her half whisper letting me know she had ended up to my left shoulder.

“Are you looking for anything in particular?” she asked making every fiber of my body silently scream in excitement.

“Oh hey!” I said, acting as if I was surprised that she had ever been in the same room with me, “No, I’m just looking for some Excedrin.”

”Headache?”

”Oh no!” I replied trying not to let my nervousness show. “Just wanted to make sure I woke up with a clear head for the morning.”

“Were you bad and had too much to drink tonight?” She asked playfully, tilting her head and letting her sultry voice perfectly match her coy, but growing smile.

Then it came over me, just like every movie I’ve ever seen where the hero finds his rhythm, that confidence, the natural talent pushing aside the butterflies. I even felt my posture correcting itself and the shoulders moving back accordingly with the new found sureness.

I just looked at her with my own sly smile, the gaze set firmly on the deepest part of her dark eyes. Women like men who can not only look at them but also give the feeling as though he is looking into her very soul. Of course the difference between that knee shaking look and one of creepy craziness is how long the look is held for.

My instincts told me it was time to speak. “Not enough to get myself in trouble, not that it’s a bad place to be.” I watched for her reaction and just as her lips were about to speak, I finished my thought, “especially with the right company.”

There was a moment where we simply looked at each other with all-telling smiles that came to our face naturally as we sank deeper into each others eyes. I couldn’t tell you exactly how long this moment was in minutes or seconds, but I do know it was blissful in it’s length and perfect timing for it’s ending.

“I shouldn’t even be here.” Softly breaking the silence with her half whispered voice as a slight move of her body motioned she should go back to the check in counter.

One of life’s most crucial moments was on its precipice patiently waiting for my next action. Raven is beautiful enough to get most men she could want and lusting forward might ruin this place in time that luck and fate led me too. But if I don’t act with enough confidence, her attraction would surely falter.

“Anticipation is a hell of a thing, isn’t it?” I started to walk away trying desperately not to look back and headed towards the elevator. “Could you put these on my bill?”

You could feel the disbelief expanding through the very air. As the elevator doors closed a slight panic had me wondering if I did the right thing. I knew there needed to be more at stake for this beautiful women who had held all the cards right up until the parting line, but did I go too far.

Thankfully the slight buzz was giving my confidence an alcoholic push in the right direction.

And whats wrong with a playground crush?

2005-03-18T07:58:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Nine of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It’s always a little strange waking up the first morning on a business trip. Unless you’re one of the uber-travellers that has the alarm clock used both at home as well as on the road, then you’re awoken by either a phone call or your cellphone so right away you know you’re not in Kansas anymore. Because I do enjoy my nights out on these trips and I’m absolutely paranoid about being late for any appointments, I have a triple safety net in alarms. First is the phone call, my PDA will go off ten minutes later and the cellphone’s alarm comes on ten minutes after that. Paranoid I know, but I’ve only been late once in my entire corporate career which goes to show that not all systems are perfect, or more likely that some parties are harder than others.

Since the alluring Raven checked us in last night I really didn’t expect to see her at the front desk when I went down for breakfast but it would be interesting to see if the hotel had the same ‘quality’ standards for the morning shift as the did for the night. The staff that I passed on the way to the breakfast bar proved the management obviously didn’t hire on looks as little Miss Raven was apparently the jewel in the crown, sparkling far beyond the other tarnished gemstones. This was just as well since Raven alone was far too much temptation.

Managed to check my emails throughout the day and was surprised to find emails from MB. It seems she wants to get together when I get back from my trip. I knew she had been keen since that first day we got reacquainted in front of the elevators, but I guess she was really focused on us getting together. You have to admire a girl with enthusiasm!

There were text messages going back and forth between AA and I all day that ranged from just cutesy to questions about likes and dislikes with just a touch of innuendo. I did text Miss PP, but didn’t get a text back. There’s a surprise.

I did finally get to speak with AA in the early part of the evening and although the conversation was short it was very sweet. We talked about what we wanted to do and where to go when I came home. She did offer to come and pick me up at the airport but the growing excitement was quickly nipped in the bud when she mentioned that her son would be with her. Nothing will kill that passionate 'You're back from a four day business trip tonsil-tickling we need to find a room kiss' quicker than a ten year old son standing there. Besides, I’m very sensitive about meeting the children of the women I date, preferring to have two or three months under our belts before the introduction. As I’ve mentioned before, I try to keep my relationships as guilt-free as I can, making it easier to do the potential dirty deed of breaking up. I honestly feel that there must be some Catholicism or Jewish in my linage to explain this immense sensitivity to guilt I seem to have.

Miss PP’s reply to my text message came in the form of a phone call some six hours after I sent it. Mental note to self, don’t rely on her if I ever get stuck under ten feet of snow in an avalanche. We had our normal conversation about our day with no affection or flirting, so it was business as usual. Oddly enough I always got excited when I saw her number come up on my caller ID, reminding myself that I really am a sick puppy.

As it was, I was getting ready to meet everyone for dinner as I spoke to AA and Miss PP so there was no time to make calls to the other women currently in rotation of ‘phone-duty’. The fact that they didn’t make the top of the list of ‘must-calls’ spoke volumes about any potential of first dates let alone any kind of relationship.

Dinner and drinks were without any scintillating tales worth telling, with the most interesting part of the evening happening as we walked through the hotel lobby at the end of the night. As I saw that ravishing half-smile sneak onto Raven's face my heart skipped a beat and other parts of my body reacted with the speed and force that lets anyone know that there's interest. When she asked how our evening was, her eyes went from person to person but ended up gazing into mine. Was I dreaming? Maybe I’m reading too much into her politeness. If my hopes were right we were both out of luck right now since it would be embarrassing to both of us and certainly demeaning to her for me to flirt in kind in front of my colleagues. Of course if I was wrong. Well, my ego didn’t even want to consider that!

I let everyone else review our earth shattering night of wild debauchery that disguised itself in the meekness of dinner, wine and coffee and I just gazed at Raven trying to mimic that half smile and pulling together every ounce of coolness I could find in my body.

Just think “What would James Dean do?”

Regardless of what Mr. Dean would do, Lucky Guy headed for the elevator as soon as the conversation hit that awkward moment of everything that could be said being said and all parties involved knowing a polite good night was the next inevitable step. Trailing the group as we made our way to the elevators I glanced back over my shoulder catching Raven quickly looking down to the check-in counter.

I need to really think about what to do next, if to do anything at all.

Trains, Planes and hot check-in girls

2005-03-10T21:47:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Eight of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Today was the day that I had to head out of town on business. It was the first time for this destination and although it was only one state over, with checking in at the airport to driving across town when we got there, we’d be on the go for six or seven hours. I say we as I was with three of my colleagues and out of all the corporate travelling I’d done, this trip would be the most relaxing. We'd all known each other for at least five years and were more friends than colleagues.

This comfort level was fortunate since I had to call five different people and pretty much tell the same story about being out of town for the next few days, that I’d try to call but it was pretty intensive schedule and I was really looking forward to seeing them when I got back. I actually told half the young ladies that I was coming back two days later than I really was. This gave me time to see two women with no questions asked by others on why we weren’t getting together as soon as I got home. It’s all about planning.

Out of all the ladies I spoke too, AA seemed to be the most fun. We’re really clicking now and I really look forward to her calls. Where I wasn’t sure about her humor before, I know now when she’s joking and have found that she’s really funny! When we weren’t talking on the phone, there were texts flying between us. If I text AA I know I’ll get a reply within fifteen minutes, but with Miss PP it was rare to ever get a reply at all.

Things were getting so cozy between AA and I that I was actually considering her offer to pick me up from the airport when I got back in town. How quickly things can change, and we hadn’t even slept together. Yet.

It’s always the small things in life that make it worth living and learning to enjoy or even treasure them can turn a bad day into good. I was reminded of this after traveling all day by taxi, plane, train and then taxi again to get to our hotel room. As exhausted as I was, trailing my pull along luggage behind me trying to smile through my five o clock shadow, everything was brightened by the site of Raven as I approached her. Working at the front desk, it was her job to check us in. I knew she was far younger than I would ever date but her manner was mature beyond her years. I wasn’t sure which feature set off which the most. Did her jet-black hair pulled back with every strand perfectly in place set off her porcelain creamy skin, or was it visa versa? Regardless, the ruby red lips formed a smile that was so sly you felt as if she knew how much you were attracted to her all along. She had our reservations and called us forward to complete the paperwork, run the credit cards and create the room keys. I think each guy in my group hoped to be last, if not to be the last one at the counter to talk to our check-in cherub but to certainly give them more time just to gaze at this beauty finishing our day.

I couldn’t help but wonder if anything could happen with us. The only thing more challenging than this situation would be the elusive bartender pick-up.

This thought was going through my mind as I slipped into the hotel’s business center and checked my emails:

A young Latin 31 year old lady sent me an email swearing she was still interested and wanted me to call her on her cellphone. That’s nice.

A 42 year old blonde with a son apologized for being very busy with her move. I think I believe the other girl more.

Looking back and gazing forward

2005-03-10T20:23:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Seven of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Okay I’ll admit that I’ve been very lazy about keeping the posts current here and it’s all made sadder by the fact that I promised myself I wouldn’t let this blog become just another inactive place in cyberspace. Just like having an argument with a woman, I could try to justify my actions and win the battle but I'd ultimately lose the war. It’s just uncivilized of me to let down the regular visitors to this blog, and with all the respect possible I’ll just humbly apologize.

Actually the start of this inactivity was reflective in the love life. Being just a few days away from going out of town on business I decided not to try and rush any last minute dates before I left. I was at a good place with AA and by seeing her before I left I could only either spoil it or if I did a great job on the date, the effect would be lost by the time I got back. As with a house, a relationship has equity but with romance it ebbs and flows with time, attention, screw-ups and successes. I didn’t see how I could add much more value to what I’d built up, so I’d let time encourage her to miss me a little.

As you may remember, last night WL and I went out and met two very nice ladies. Well, mine was nice. I swear that if WL had fallen onto one knee and proposed to the girl he’d just met, she would’ve said yes. The girl gave a whole new meaning to the word desperate! Whenever WL and I have a little too much to drink we both tend to feel it for a large part of the following day. However since he owns his own business, recovery for him is no farther than a phone call to say he’s not coming in. I have the burden of living in the corporate world that expects you looking just as sharp with a hangover and three hours sleep as you would after a restful weekend and wearing a newly pressed suit. By the time I got to talk to WL today he was just emerging from his bed at 11.30 asking whatever did we drink last night and was cursing up a storm about ‘Queen Clingy’ that he felt I set him up with. Last I looked he was older than me and his legs worked fine. Both of those gave him the power to make a decision and walk away. Of course I was driving, but that’s really beside the point.

Despite all his complaining, he admitted that we’d had yet another great time and we talked about getting together when I got back from my business trip.

I did have an email from this older lady and as much as I was concerned about her age I was blown away by her looks. Amazingly beautiful woman, in an older sense of course. Maybe I’ll reply to her. Have to think about it.

Spoke to the regulars: Miss PP and AA. Left messages for NT and TZ.

Thoughts from the Homefront

2005-03-03T01:55:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Six of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Tell a woman that no one is perfect and it's amazing how quickly they'll agree, all the while staring right at you. It's not necessarily the quickness in which they start nodding their heads that bothers me, but the little wicked grin that pops onto their face that's always made me wonder.

But since everything really does need a little polishing up occasionally, I noticed as I was reviewing this Lucky and interesting life blog that it maybe hard to keep track or really even fathom the actually activities that are going on. For every date there may be several phone calls to potential ladies at different stages of the dating game. So I'll try to be a little more accurate and give a better idea of the finer points of a day in the life of Lucky Guy.

Phone calls
Take today for instance. I spoke to Miss PP. Not a long conversation and bearing in mind her lack of intimacy, not a particularly deep one either.

A young latin lady gave me her number in an email this morning so I left her a message.

Emails
Emails can say so much about a person. How much attention they pay to details (if they answer all your questions, or point out you didn't answer all of theirs), if they're a person that is more visual that factual (cutesy font decorative graphics) and of course if they really like to type or not. They could just not like typing, or be one of those hectic people always with something on the social calendar. Since you can work out what kind of personality they have, it can help you decide if you like them and more importantly take the time out of your busy life to actually meet.

A woman finishing up her criminologist degree wrote back today and although she falls under the cutesy category, she seems quite happy with the endless emails. Not good.

NT on the other hand, my Nordic queen is heading out to a meditation weekend and will be away from phones and even the computer for the whole weekend. Do I believe her, or maybe more importantly the question is, am I overly concerned? Not really. I am curious though how one would pack for that. Are robes mandatory and do you have to bring your own incense. Surely it would be supplied, sort of like it's a given that soap and shampoo will be in your hotel room.

Finally got an email from a young lady with no photo and a vague description. Certainly need to put her on top of the list!

Back to the real world.
Once I start to get that special feeling with a person the romantic in me comes out to play. I wrote a desperate plea to help stop the art of romance from dying out last month as I have this nagging feeling that playful courting isn't done properly and appreciated even less.

But the true romantics will agree that nothing is nicer than laying next to that special someone and gentle stroking the underside of her wrist or running your fingernails lightly up, down and across her back.

Well this was the place AA and I were getting to after a slow start on our first date and a surprisingly good time on our second.

I've found in the past that nothing impresses someone who likes you more than turning up at her work to take her to lunch. She looks like Debra Winger from an officer and a Gentleman to her friends and you look like a hero to her. I'd even planned to pickup a Single rose to take in with me. But it seems that AA had the same idea and called me before I could even leave the house! You have to love a woman who can take control.

Just as l was thinking that this day was going to be one of those magical moments we looked back on with a warm smile, I actually turned up for the lunch and reality made it's appearance. Don't you wish you could live in the world of anticipation and hope?

She looked amazing. I couldn't tell you what was more beautiful, her sparkling eyes or the warm smile that greeted me as I approached her at our meeting point. Interestingly enough, we had lunch maybe two restaurants down from where our first date was. At the time I took this for a good sign. Oops.

She did have a polite way of criticizing, I'll be the first to admit, but it was criticizing none the less. My jeans were too baggy, didn't I know that tight jeans were in style? My shirt was nice but why wasn't it hanging out as was also the current trend. I really tried not to sound too defensive as I explained my jeans weren't that loose and my shirt was a little big. With the pattern it happened to be, if I wore it with the shirt tails hanging out it would be more like a nightshirt than a fashion statement.

I tried to ignore the pettiness of her comments and keep the rest of the lunch on a happier and more carefree note, avoiding the temptation to ask her why she didn't lose her burnette hair for blonde, since after all, that does seem to be the fashion.

As we said goodbye at the end of lunch I wondered if the ringing bell that I could only hear ever so faintly was for the start of some distant church service or my imagination sounding the death knell for this relationship? Fortunately I wouldn't have the chance to see her tonight as she had her son. Besides. My very good friend and I were going out and we always had a great time!

I could've never guessed what a great time it would truly be.

It's a fair world after all (not)

2005-03-03T01:47:00.000-05:00

Is it just me, or do men and women seem to have two completely different views of going out into the wild and unruly world of bars, also known as the singles scene?

The biggest difference has to be the woman’s ability to go out with as little as five dollars in their purse. Imagine, an entire night's entertainment of drink and food for as little as five dollars. I guess the real question is, does she expect change from that? Interestingly enough, I’ve had many lady friends who tell me they can in fact still have that same five dollars in their purse when they get home. Of course the credit card is taken, but if you ask a woman why she has it the answer tends to be 'For emergencies'.

The man on the other hand will need all his cash, credit cards, finest shirt and whatever luck and finesse he can muster. Between the courage we men get from the alcohol and the encouragement (or peer pressure depending on your point of view) to drink, a clear head will be a struggle for most of the night.

Regardless of these differences though, generally speaking both men and women are going out for the same reason. To meet someone special who’ll save them from this world of singledom and mediocrity. If you think about it, this search is really a kind of ongoing application process to couplehood. But how to ace the interview process ?

When women go out, their main objective is to catch the eye of someone who is funny, cute, not a psychopath, doesn't have too many ex wives, with the preference being none of course and absolutely isn't involved in any kind of relationship with anyone. As odd as this may seem to some men, the ex-wife category would indeed include the men who are still living with the wives they have yet to divorce. Elementary, but still cruel I know. As sad to men as the last point may sound, under most circumstances the women aren't looking to go home and have sex with anyone they've met that same night. Sorry.

The ladies hope to attract the right person by looking beautiful and putting themselves where they are not only seen but also approachable. Bearing in mind we all want to be where the party is, ideally a woman should look like she's having fun, but then again why wouldn't she? This is her world. The entire industries of bars, happy hours and ladies night is to have a convenient place where a group of women are located so the men can come and meet them. She is the flower attracting the bee and she simply needs to sit back and wait for the pollination process to begin. Their biggest fear is a wasp or fly trying to move in on her petals. This is why all women pray to the dating gods that they won't have some creep or bore come and hit on them, taking up all their time and scaring away all the great bees, I mean men.

Men on the other hand are facing a much bigger challenge. Throughout the night, everything that's said and done will be judged by both the other men in the group as well as by any women he talks too. This isn’t even considering that the opinions of the friends of the young lady could make or break how long he can talk to her.

But the whole adventure starts with finding the woman that he finds attractive and will give him the spark to get off his stool, walk over and talk to her. Once he finds her though, most men want some sort of sign that's she's interested. A smile, a laugh in his direction, even a glance that lasts just that little bit longer than it should, anything to let him know. This is a mixed blessing though because when he sees she’s interested he has to actually make the approach. Think about this. The man has to appear confident but not cocky, be funny but not goofy and the hardest part of all, edgy but not offensive. Not only does he have to do this slightly buzzed from all the alcohol, but also to a person he has never met and knows nothing about. Well except for the fact that she's amazingly good looking and he would like to see her naked, preferably sooner than later. Even as the hello is said however, he's wondering 'does she think I'm some creep about to bore her'.

He knows his friends are watching, but it also feels like the rest of the world is as well. His fate is in the hands of this total stranger that he picked out in a bar. This same woman who’s irked because she does the same job as her male counterpart at work but for less money will decide if this man can stay and continue the conversation with her. This same woman who endured cat calls and wolf whistles during her lunch hour and called all men pigs has the power to send this man away for his walk of shame back to his barstool or snickering friends.

He is at a point of hope and she's in a moment of decision. This man who could move girders on a building site, put together large dollar deals or save lives waits to see if the conversation continues or if it finished before it started.

It makes you wonder how men and women who seem to start in such different places actually end up in the same relationship, doesn’t it?

Now you've read this entry, why dont you read the rest of the blog!!!!

Tall women need loving too!

2005-03-03T01:32:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Six of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. Continued

My very good friend WL and I headed to the local hotspot that had a variety of bars and restaurants all within walking distance along the same street. The crowds that went there ranged in age from the mid to late twenties right up to people in their fifties. Sidewalks bustled with young ladies wearing the latest, slinkiest outfits hoping to catch the eye of the groups of men wandering from bar to bar, restaurant to restaurant. There were older collections of couples walking more slowly up and down the street with their interest more on the fashions in the store windows rather than on the younger, single ladies. At least while the wives were looking. Like most developed downtown areas in South Florida, the street was one lane in each direction that were separated by a beautifully landscaped medium dotted with thick, mature trees. With the would-be diners waiting for a table in the more popular restaurants or large packs of people coming down the sidewalk, you'd have to occassionally step between the cars parked on the side of the road and out into the street to get around them. But there was really no danger of being hit by the traffic crawling from light to light.

This was one of our usual hangouts and somehow we always seemed to end up having a great time whenever we went there. Now WL was one of those guys that everyone liked to have as a friend and the ladies absolutely adored him. We had two very different tastes in women since he's a little older and he loved blondes and I was younger preferring the burnettes, it was a perfect friendship!

But on this night it seemed like the evening just wasn't hitting it's stride and with the really disappointing lunch with AA fresh in my mind, I was coming close to thinking I just shouldn't have gotten out of bed. It was so slow in fact, we decided to get something to eat in the restaurant portion of the bar even though it was nearly midnight! That's never a good sign of a successful night.

After dinner we found ourselves standing at the back of the bar listening to the bands last set. The conversation was about nothing, although occasionally something would come up, but mostly was neither here nor there. I started joking with WL about how great his Jacket looked on him and I was checking out the material when I noticed a tall, sandy brown blonde looking over at us. Not missing an opportunity, I leaned over and asked her what she thought about the material of his jacket and indicated for her to feel it. Haven’t you ever had a woman feeling the fabric of your suit jacket or shirt and ask you what material it was? Do you think she really cares? No! She’s flirting with you! Needless to say, she didn't needed to be invited twice!

As nice as it was that WL and I were talking to two very nice and certainly sexy ladies, I noticed that there was already a gentleman standing next to them who we had interrupted. I felt bad and if I’d seen him, I probably wouldn’t have struck up the conversation. But with the whole thing happening so spontaneously, who knew they would be so interested and they certainly seemed to jump at the chance to talk to WL and I. With the girls all but ignoring him, he eventually left anyway and with him went my guilt.

I found out during the drinking and dancing that my young lady (SW) was in her mid thirties and had a twelve-year-old daughter. She was five foot seven inches tall, but with her three-inch heels she was taller than the ladies I was used to being with. She wasn’t the most beautiful person, but her looks were definitely striking. I knew from how we were talking and the way our bodies were drawn to each other that there was definitely a connection here. The only problem I could see at this point was that she lived at least thirty miles away, but with South Florida traffic it might as well be a two hour drive. But who’s going to let geography get in the way of an opportunity standing right in front of you?

My friend WL on the other hand felt he was getting the short end of the stick. I’ll admit that SW’s friend wasn’t as ‘fit’, shall we say and it did come out that she had four children, but I can’t see why WL was being so judgmental. This friend of SW really seemed to like WL but he was resisting any chance she offered to get closer and anytime we talked about all getting together at a future date, he always seemed to change the subject.

During one of our dances, SW just looked at me and asked me to kiss her. It started as a passionate kiss that quickly evolved into a full tongue on tongue, tickling each other’s tonsils kind of kiss. When we were finished some time later, with a pained look on her face she told me she just meant a quick kiss. When I went to apologize she begged me not too and we started to kiss again. I guess the night was going well.

Unfortunately for WL, his night was going equally as well although he would of rather it wasn’t. SW’s friend was Cuban and a little heavier than her. But she was certainly enthusiastic about WL and them making plans together. From taking WL’s motorcycle out for a long ride to just going to see a movie, it seemed every time I had the chance to eves drop on the conversation she was trying to get WL to commit to some future event. Although he was smiling the whole time, I could see she was starting to wear down his patience. I was slightly amused by this, I'd never seen anyone get to him.

Since WL was getting tired of the whole night, and considering we were fast approaching two in the morning I sort of realized it was getting close to calling it a night. When I explained to SW and her friend that I had to leave to take WL home, I had driven us after all, SW offered to take us both home dropping off WL first. I wanted some time to talk about what had happened with WL so I made some reasonable excuses with my pace picking up as I watched WL out of the corner of my eye start to fidget anxiously. He was ready to leave whether the conversation was done or not!

We all swapped numbers and I promised to call really soon.

No really I will.

Bathroom faux pas....but funny!

2005-02-26T11:11:00.000-05:00

One of the most sensual moments has to be getting ready for the day together in the bathroom. Between soaping each other up in the shower to working around each other for brushing teeth, applying deodorant and drying the hair, it’s such an affirmation to your ‘couplehood’.

Now I know everyone will say that baths are more romantic than showers, but ideally they’re meant to be taken together in the evening or at night when you really don’t have to be anywhere anytime soon. For fun and speed the shower is playful and yet still manages to get you clean with lot’s of washing each other along the way. I did hear a female comedian once say that she always has the cleanest breasts in the world when she takes a shower with a man. Funny!

So there we were, a lady friend and I doing the bathroom mambo working our way around each other as we went through the various hygiene routines. Now people and the products they use is an interesting thing to consider. We all have our favorite products for deodorant, shampoo, toothpaste and mouthwash. We can use other brands when we’re on a ‘sleepover’, but we’re never one hundred percent happy doing so. It’s like we feel less clean because we’re not using our own, comfortable brand of product even though the one we have to use may be ten times better!

This is what brought me to reading the toothpaste tube as I brushed my teeth in her bathroom. As not to gross out the casual reader I would like to point out that I did in fact have my own toothbrush at her house since sleepovers were a regular occurrence. As I was reading the tube to make sure that this make-do toothpaste was as good as the obviously far superior brand I had at my own home, I saw a set of instructions that I probably would have never seen otherwise.

Still brushing my teeth I turned to my lady friend, pointed to the instructions and asked, “What does this say?”

She gave me a puzzled look as she read it. “Start at bottom. Push towards cap.”

“So let me ask you?” I asked, “You seem to follow the instructions on your toothpaste, why can’t you do that on mine at my house?” Going to my bathroom and finding my toothpaste squeezed in the middle of the tube had always bothered me but I never did say anything, until now.

She half-smiled as she gave me a funny look, ”Your tube is so big and it’s hard to get down there. Plus it’s so much work!” My lady friend went back to her little hygiene routine of cleaning her ear with a q-tip.

I stood there, letting the pregnant pause settle in the bathroom.

“So it’s sort of like your views on oral sex?”

She looked at me. “Okay”, the last syllable was still stretching as she walked out the bathroom.

Not the most diplomatic thing to say.

But it was funny.

And dating waits for no man!

2005-02-24T19:36:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Five of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Firstly, if you’ve come here looking for the Thong Theory just click here, or go to the next post down. I really didn’t expect as much interest as the topic got and thankfully I spotted and corrected some grammatical and spelling errors. Hopefully I caught them before too many people read the post. You see what happens when you post in haste!

So, sorry to make you look for it but I since I didn’t want to fall too far behind with the tales of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it, we really needed to move onto more current matters!

Just to catch up.

The main flame is Miss PP, but she’s always out of town and her emotions always seem just out of reach. BBO looked like she might be someone special but I got about as much personal attention as one of her business customers, and not a good one at that. I realize a lot of men would use this ‘in’ to work on her, but I’m not one to convince people they have to like me. After all, there seems to be enough out there that really do, and Miss Right certainly will (I hope). Apart from all the other passing interests of casual phone calls and email exchanges, the most intriguing person in my life right now is AA, and I got to see her last night!

I wasn’t sure what was more surprising last night, the invitation to the movies from AA or the fact that we seemed to have such a great time. You may remember that I was put off just a touch by her bluntness and dry personality, but either they didn’t have the chance to come out or I was just getting to know her better.

Actually my friends have often criticized me for making assumptions or judgments too quickly, saying I’ve moved onto the next person before I had a chance to get to know someone better. Maybe this was the case here?

I called AA today to thank her for a wonderful time last night and she seemed really happy about the movie, kissing in the car and was looking forward to our next date. Have you ever had the feeling that the person you were talking too on the phone was glowing on the other end of the line and was finding it hard to talk because she was smiling so incredibly hard? That was AA.

Actually, she reminded me that we wouldn’t be able to see other next week since I’ll be on my business trip. Scary. I can remember all these different facts about the different young ladies such as foavorite foods, types of flowers and even what nights are best for us to get together (one of the considerations of dating a single mother) but I have to be reminded about something that keeps my lights on and the food on the table. Funny.

One of my very good friends called and as glad as I was to hear from him, I was dreading the conversation getting around to us going out. It had been a tiring few days and I really needed to stay home and recharge my batteries. I guess this is the difference between being in your twenties and well, where I am now. Sad thought, but true I it seems. We made plans to out tomorrow night. This was actually good. With all this internet dating, it’s nice to get out and meet people face to face and feel that chemistry from the minute you meet. The excitement of making eye contact from across the room and the goofy high school grins until you actually get to speak.

It should be fun!

The Thong Theory

2005-02-23T12:10:00.000-05:00

Probably one of the greatest fashion contributions to dating has to be the Thong. This piece of underwear that uses less material than a small washcloth invokes the most immediate and obvious reactions from any straight red-blooded male. I would be counted among them since oddly enough, this item can decide how I ultimately feel about a woman in our first few dates. Is she wearing a thong? What kind of thong? Is it showing, does she want it to show and should it even be allowed to show? As shallow as this may all sound, it’s really no more so than a woman judging a guy by what he wears or the confidence he wears it with.

The downside to the thong isn’t of it’s making but of it’s popularity.

Back when thongs were just coming onto the scene it seemed only the most sexually adventurous and sensually astute women wore them. If you were on a date with a woman who wore one, you knew that her attitude was playful and outgoing. Seductively, she came on the date wanting to feel like a sexy woman with so many secrets simmering just underneath the surface, waiting for the right person to release them.

Indeed, if you asked the non-thong wearing dates why they didn’t like them, the complaints of them feeling uncomfortable, riding up the butt and other excuses were made along with some quite funny faces being pulled as they were described. This leaves the guy thinking 'So later, when I want to cover her body with honey and body candy, I'm guessing the answer would be no?'. Now I think we have an idea of the males disappointment.

The Queens of Sultriness on the other hand would admit that although it did feel uncomfortable the first few times she wore it, how the thong made her look and certainly how it made her feel, it was worth getting used to the ‘butt-floss’ problem. Now this is my type of woman.

So one can see how it was an easy way to find out just how sexy your date really was the first time you were out with a simple and quick thong check. There was a sense of understanding in the world and all of nature was in balance.

Then the thong became hugely popular with maybe the peer pressure or even peer support helping the non-wearing women to get used to the feeling, even enough to make thongs an exclusive choice for all of their underwear. But nothing had changed with their views and urges with sex, just the underwear. Do you see the confusion?

Since this coming together of thongs, a quick check can't really give an indication or hint to the attitude or views of passion, sexuality or even the confidence of a woman. For the first few times I was misled by the wearing of a thong it was frustrating, but now with the understanding that it's just a piece of underwear and not a view on how to live life, I'm left feeling simply disappointed. And this isn’t even thinking about the women who wear them and definitely shouldn’t.

Of course my breath is still taken away when I see a women undress and catch sight of her thong in all it’s full glory. Even though there really isn’t that much to behold, the way it presses against her lower regions and wraps daintily around her waist, disappearing into her curvaceous butt is just an amazing site.

And just because a man has to know these things, there will always be the need for a thong check at the beginning of the date. After all, she never knows there was one and you’ll know if there is one!

Just my theory.

And the heavens weeped...The List is no MORE

2005-02-23T10:12:00.000-05:00

The other morning saw an event that was so horrible I never even imagined it happening.

The List is gone. No more. Never to be recreated.

I've mentioned on the blog a few times before that for whatever reason, I'd kept an ongoing List of the young ladies I'd been lucky enough to be intimate with. Although the names are from the very first time I was with a woman (or girl as I was but a boy), the List wasn't created or kept up to date until I was in my late twenties. So even then there was some haziness and guess work since we all know the college years are the most fun and certainly prolific!

Like many people I have a PDA that keeps mostly work realted information, contacts, birthdays and notes. One of those notes was indeed the List, so I was horrified yesterday morning when I tried to switch on the PDA only to find the battery was dead. This has happened before and usually by plugging in the charger I can get everything to where it needs to be and carry on if nothing had happened. But when the PDA booted up this time it gave me all the same start-up screens I saw when I first bought it, asking for my name, time-zone, etc, etc.

The List was lost.

This List was never meant for bragging since no-one but myself ever saw it. Even the number of the women on the list has stayed with me and me alone. I was hoping that when I was old and wrinkled wondering where my life went, the names on the list would bring back memories that would make me smile and laugh so much so the old bones ached at the shaking.

With the years that have passed and the names that meant so much to me at one time gone without warning, there is no sure way to reconstruct the list.

Alas, the List is not to be.

May we all take a moment for the passing of a piece of living history.

To the List.

Would you like some romance with that movie?

2005-02-19T15:07:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Four of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

The time of week is fast approaching where Miss PP and I would be making plans to pick her up from the airport and what we would do during her time at home. But the way her scheduling fell she was going to be out of town for at least another week and a bit and as happy as I should be with this extended gift of freedom, there was a certain somberness to everything.

But since there’s no sense in crying over spilled milk, time marches on and the early bird gets the worm, I threw myself into the mission (which I did choose to accept) of finding Ms Right, or maybe even Ms Right Now.

I left a message for NT and wasn’t sure if she was avoiding my call since I asked to cut our last conversation short to watch that TV show. It sounds much worse when I put it like that than it really was. After all, I only watch a few weekly shows and it was particularly good this week. Since I’m looking for an understanding woman we could consider this some sort of test, maybe?

Also left a message for TZ who gave me her number after a few email exchanges. NT and TZ look completely different with NT being of a Nordic build and TZ is as curvy as they come. One’s a blonde and very corporate while the other is brunette and seems a little bit like a hippie. But what is life without the variety and who am I to say what Mrs. Lucky should look like or do?

Since I still hadn't heard back from BB, I gave her another call. I could've sworn that she had a great time on our date; maybe she was upset I took so long to call her back?

Received an email from a young lady who wrote in her profile that she was miserable and her life was so sad. The email didn’t even say what she enjoyed about my ad, why she thought we would go well together or even why I should write her. It just gave her real email address. Oh yes, I’m going to writing back really quickly. The sad part is, I’m sure someone will and then end up wondering why the date isn’t as fun as he'd like. Of course a sadder thought is some guy taking advantage of her by showing enough attention to get her into bed and then disappearing. That’ll really help her self-esteem.

Later in the afternoon I called AA to see how her day off was going. She was so cute when I called, which at first threw me off balance since her accent and demeanor leads you to assume she’s has a much harder personality. When I asked her what she was doing with her time off she mentioned that maybe she would go and see a movie and asked me for suggestions. When we were talking about what was out there, she nervously asked if I'd like to join her. Wow. I think AA likes me!

After work I met her at the cinema and even though I was ten minutes late she wasn’t angry but seemed really glad to see me. During the movie she affectionately touched and stroked my arm, even resting her head on my shoulder occasionally. I knew there was something there when she let tuck my hand in between her crossed legs, just above the knees. It can seem a little forward but it’s far more intimate than sexual, and if the lady lets you do that, then she’s obviously very comfortable with you. Comfort is a BIG part of moving things along to a more ‘personal’ level.

This brings us to the end of the movie and a very important tip. If she’s parked closer than you and offers to drive you to your car, say yes. This isn’t the time to be macho or the gentleman. She obviously trusts you enough to let her into her car and is thinking there might be a chance for a really nice goodnight kiss. But don’t assume it'll happen for sure and whatever you do, don’t jump on her as soon as the car door is closed. Sit back and relax, everything will happen as it should and in it’s own time.

She did offer to drive me to my car and yes we had one of those cute conversations about the movie that only couples can have. The moment did come up where the conversation was slowly winding down and those bedroom eyes started to appear. Not as passionately as the time I described with SC, but certainly enough for me to lean over and taste her sweet thin lips one more time and this time there was no cook to interrupt us! The kisses were nice, I didn't feel the time was right to touch her anywhere other that her face or arms. I felt that although she was enjoying everything, there was some hesitation on either what we were doing or what she wanted to happen next.

Regardless, I wanted to get home check emails and have that ‘wind down’ period I missed after work because I rushed out to meet AA tonight. I promised to call her when I got home.

Two thoughts about tonight. One, I’m definitely going to see AA again and for some reason I think the next date could be much more intimate. Secondly, one of the downsides to seeing several women at the same time is that sometimes you have to watch the same movie again, as I did tonight.

But I guess it’s a small price to pay for the company of a beautiful womanJ

Getting back on the treadmill of dating....

2005-02-18T18:48:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Four of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Just as quickly as Miss PP and I seem to coming to a screeching halt, other dating possibilities were speeding towards me. I knew I should be drowning in the giddiness of schoolboy excitement, but I can't help but feel a little sad.

Of course, the whole point of a dating blog is for the funny stories, crazy situations and even crazier people that are involved. So when a single person becomes successful in the world of dating and manages to find that one special person, there really is nothing else to write in the dating blog! Knowing the frustrations with dating Miss PP may make for great reading, but it's terrible for my love life.

I've been getting some winks and interesting emails on the various online dating sites. Whether it's a subtle cockiness, confidence from all the attention or just my age lately I feel less like playing the email game for more than three responses. If she doesn't have the confidence to talk on the phone by the third email, then is she really going to be someone I want to date? Besides, it's rare to have emailing marathons turn into anything other than a dead end anyway.

There are the ones who email with enthusiasm and then seem to disappear for a few days, but not to sound too cocky, it's hard to notice since there always seems to be other emails to fill the gaps. Recently a lady re-emerged earlier this week that was rather persistent about forty-five days ago but simply stopped writing after a few weeks. Another who seemed equally as keen stopped replying last week only to write again asking what happened to me.

She was built of sturdy stuff
Some of the emails turn into calls though. I had an enjoyable telephone conversation with NT today. A blond woman in her late thirties, early forties, blonde who chose slender as her body description. She volunteered a description of her figure as that of Nordic descent so not incredibly curvy like a lot of the Latin women in South Florida. I actually was lucky enough to have a few dates some months ago with a woman that fits NT’s description perfectly. Not only did I enjoy how her body was shaped, her European attitude was open, refreshing and very amicable. The only reason we didn't carry on dating was because of the lack of chemistry between us and fortunately I realized this before we got to that intimate stage. Not saying we didn't come very close, as I can tell you she had the softest skin.

The conversation flowed easily and I enjoyed that we were both pretty frank with each other on several topics normally difficult to bring up, let alone talk about. Everything was going so smoothly that we were still talking when one of the only shows I bother to watch came on TV, and I think she was taken aback when I asked to wrap up the call so I could watch it. Once again, maybe it's confidence, age or all the recent attention but not only did I want to have sometime to relax both mentally as well as physically before my date tonight, but I really wanted to see this show!

I promised I'd call her later, but unfortunately I didn't.

Onto the date
I had to leave for my date with AA by the time the show was finishing and because of this, the date was starting a touch later than I prefer on a 'school-night' but deep down I was so looking forward to this date.

Even so, the enthusiasm that’s needed to look your best when you’re getting ready just wasn’t there and the clothes I chose reflected it. Nice, but not amazing. I had on brushed grey dress pants, black long sleeve shirt and since the night was cold, my leather jacket. Admittedly the jacket is brown and isn't perfect with black and grey, but it's a classic cut that’s been 'worn in' over the years. You can feel the quality in the weight of it, and nothing looks better than a leather jacket that’s been broken in over time. I was really beyond caring about the brown jacket with black shirt. After all she should like me for me and not for my clothes, right?

The exotic beauty known as AA

2005-02-18T18:40:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty Four of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. continued

We had arranged to meet in front of three restaurants that all also had nice bars giving us a tasteful variety of choices. We met on one of the online dating services I use and her ad only had a picture of her face. So this was the first time we'd met in person and although I was a few minutes late, I had something cute and witty to say and I was forgiven. It also broke the ice and we slipped right back into the comfortable conversation we had yesterday. As we spoke I was trying to take in her physical appearance as best I could without seeming too obvious or intense. There's nothing worse than being caught looking at a womans butt or chest, well maybe being caught grabbing them. She was far prettier than her pictures on her online ad and although I couldn't remember how she described herself, there was no way anyone would be disappointed. At about 5'4" she had a slender curved figure with slightly wide hips and a generous chest. Her dark hair was tightly pulled back and her smiled accentuated by her high, strong cheekbones. We chose the bar that we felt would be the quietest so we would have the chance to get to know each other better.

As soon as we sat down it was obviously apparent she was overcome with the feeling of 'what am I supposed to talk about now'. From the phone conversation I knew she has a young son but divorced from the father shortly after the baby was born. It was no shocker to find out that she hadn’t lived in this country too long, with the part of the world she's from having had some difficult times recently and religion playing in a large part of the problem. Keeping direct eye contact didn't seem to come easy to her, which was surprising since during my 'create-a-conversation' efforts I learned she served in the army of her native country, which you would think would give a wonderful self confidence. I respected the pride she had for her country but with every topic of conversation coming back to hearing how great it was, I had to wonder why she would lower herself to live in the US?

There was no doubt AA was a beautiful, smart, self-assured woman but the more the night wore on, the more my enthusiasm wore down. We ate, drank and talked until they started to close down the restaurant/bar around us. It was nice that AA reached for bill and wanted to pay at least half, but of course being the gentleman I wouldn’t let her pay a penny. Bearing in mind she only had a little of her wine the whole night preferring her coffee instead so I wasn’t surprised when she didn’t seem to keen going to a bar in the downtown area. Looking for idea’s, I really thought AA would say no again when I asked her if she was interested in grabbing another cup of coffee at an all night diner around the corner.

Once in the Diner my feelings about her started to change. It was nice having her next to me in the booth, but even nicer to know we were there because she wanted us to sit side by side. Even so, it was a school night and all the tools in my 'create-a-conversation' kit was getting low. When we wrapped things up and she sweetly offered, again, to pick up the check. A woman who makes the motions to pay the restaurant bill, or even half leaves a warming feeling that's better than the most kindest and creative compliment. Not only does it give you a new level of respect for her, but no gentleman would ever actually let her pay so why all women don't make this gesture is beyond me.

As we stood outside the Diner we were feeling our way through the uneasiness that’s comes at the end of those so-so or unsure dates. This could end in a variety of ways, each creating their own next steps. A hug and tap on the shoulder may merit a follow up call, but certainly no sooner than three days later. A light kiss gets a call a little sooner while a passionate make out session guarantees a call the next day. Grinding and biting during the mad grope goodnight gets you an invitation back to my place for coffee which in turn will get you breakfast in the morning.

I ran my hands gently up and down her sides in a partly romantic fashion, but also to get a better idea of her figure.

"Are you enjoy grabbing my butt?" she asked with a welcoming smile. I was just thinking that she had a superbly slim and tight figure. How could I pass up this opportunity?

"If wanted to grab your butt, I would do THIS!" actually reaching around and grabbing two cheekfuls of round, firm, foreign butt just as I came to the climax of the sentence. Even as I did this with all my naturally playful confidence, I knew her next reaction would be key. Not only would it tell me what kind of girl she was as well as how attracted she was to me, but also whether or not I'd be slapped cold and hard then and there.

She laughed.

It wasn't a humorous laugh but more of a knowing, naughty, approving chuckle with that sparkle in her eyes. We leaned into each other for the first kiss of the night. It was nice and was turning more passionate fairly quickly when we heard a noise behind her. We looked around to see the Diner's cook having a cigarette and I watched the lust get washed from her face away by embarrassment and nervousness.

It wasn't much longer before she was in her car heading home and leaving me to wonder which way we could go.

More importantly, did I want it to go anywhere?

Retrospectives

2005-02-18T01:14:00.000-05:00

It's official. It's been nearly two months since I started this blog. Aside from all of the technical information I've learned about blogging I think there has been some pretty interesting posts (if I do say so myself:) ).

So in celebration, let's review what’s already been said and enjoy the stories again!

Let's start at the beginning. The rules and guidelines that were set for this blog way back in December when the whole idea of sharing was just a twinkle in my eye and a few bytes on my computer.

It was certainly fun!
This story is one of my favorite ones from the past and it's written as it happened, blow by blow. I was picked up by a girl in a bar and used for sex. If every red-blooded male who reads this doesn't stand up to salute fate and everything it does for us...well there are certain personal items you just need to give up.

This story should be respected
This one was very near and dear to my heart. I hope it's enjoyed but also given the understanding and respect it deserves. Of course the sex in the Jacuzzi was great!

Advice item #1
This was a great column about where and who you shouldn't date. Ignore this advice at your own risk.

Three women in one day?
Can a man fall into bed with three women in one day, purely by accident? I guess so. I couldn't believe it either! Part One, Two and Three.

Time for a moment of Deepness
A serious introspective of where we are with true love.

Another moment of Deepness
This should be taken seriously. Well maybe not! Some thoughts about Romantic Getaways.

Finally, finishing on a humorous note
A blog that sums up what being single really means in the everyday world.

As you can see, a lot of good stuff. Might even be worthwhile reading all the entries just to catch up. I know this isn't the quickest blog to read, but it certainly is one of the more fun ones. I will never lie in these pages and just hope that you can enjoy reading about these adventures as much as I did in making them:)

Lucky Guy!

A 'Hitch' in romance

2005-02-17T17:47:00.000-05:00

It's funny how several things happen together and they coincide to form a thought, bring together a conclusion that you wouldn't have either come up with or felt as strongly about.

Watching the movie 'Hitch' starring Will Smith and a certain look from my date afterwards made me realize something that should be troubling.

To really understand what I realized, lets go over what all the men know and the smarter women have discovered. There are five basic types of men and they are as follows:

The 'I think I went out with him' guy
This is the man that never gets more than a peck on the cheek for a kiss goodnight and certainly doesn't make it to the second date. With anyone.

Whether it's because he doesn't listen, is too touchy or just generally a strange person, all women who do go out with him ask themselves "What was I thinking going out with him?" as soon as her door shuts at the end of the date.

Maybe it's because the date is so bad the memory of it is pushed from the ladies mind, or it was so insipid that the night doesn't even get mentally logged. Either way, when she's out with friends at a later date and they see him, the infamous line is muttered, 'I think I went out with him'.

The 'Oh my God can you believe I went out with him' guy
Like his cousin, 'I think I went out with him' he was a bad date too, but it was so terrible that the woman had no choice but to end it early. How badly he messed up or offended her is reflected in how she left. Just being a general bore will get faked illness such as a stomach ache, while a man being a rude or lecherous date will have her just coming out and say she wants to be taken home or worse going to the restroom and never coming back.

Unlike his cousin the 'Oh my God can you believe I went out with him' guy is never forgotten by the female species but marked within the female group and usually avoided when spotted first.

The 'He's such a nice guy' guy.
This is the saddest kind of guy that has all the other men feeling his pain.

Oddly enough, at the end of the day he really doesn't do anything wrong. The 'He's such a nice guy' pays attention to what's said, buys sweet thoughtful gifts, calls when says he will, brings flowers on every date and even puts the woman on a pedestal.

Unfortunately he's not as vibrant as the other types of guys and maybe his coordination or athletic skills are somewhat lacking. Socially, he's certainly not as polished as he could be and the whole idea of edginess or daring is a little risqué for his own comfort.

The good news is that some of these men are successful with women, usually for their 'future value' potential. So not only does he have a woman but he'll eventually find himself more colorful, outgoing and with a whole new outlook on life. Unfortunately, the ones that aren't chosen will continue to be the 'He's such a nice guy' guy.

The 'Sex was great, but...' Guy
This tends to be the type A personalities and is considered the most popular and admired. These guys have what it takes to not only get a second, third, or fourth date and quite frankly, it's not like they need anywhere that amount of time to have sex with a woman

Where first impressions are all important, he succeeds without even tapping into his boyish charm or charisma.

It's with the bigger social skills he follows through. With his own priorities some basic expectations such as calling when promised or even turning up on dates as planned can fall by the wayside. The 'Sex was great, but...' guy is notorious for preferring to spend time with his male friends doing 'guy things' rather than be with his new found girl unless they're on a date.

It is indeed with regret that women will point to this man and tell their friends, 'Sex was great, but...'.

The 'I just don't know what happened' Guy or also known as the 'Commitment phobic' Guy
He is one of the more interesting because he tends to blend a little bit of the best of the other three types.

This man is the ultimate flirt and could have 'Jack of all trades and master of none' as his motto for his social skill set and life. While not as colorful or as physical as it's 'Sex was great, but...' but he has mastered the social skills 'He's such a nice guy' and 'Oh my God can you believe I went out with him guy' didn't. Ladies always start out thinking 'I just don't know what happened' guy is too good to be true, but is won over by his apparent sincerity and charm, accepting him into her life as well as her heart.

Not only does this type of man support his woman in day to day activities, have all the 'conversations' she likes to have, but he also makes her feel good about 'them'. But whether it's from unrealistic expectations or being hurt before, he'll start to wonder about what they have or where they're going. Maybe he's just more easily distracted?

Either way, he can leave in a heartbeat and although he won't totally understand why, in his mind it's the only thing to do.

Now we have that out of the way, I have this horrible feeling I'm 'I just don't know what happened' guy. This hit me when I went to see Hitch with a date. I'll write about the date in more detail later, but the look that I got is something for now.

I love romance. I like to pamper, spoil and practice the art of romance. With the flirting, glances, touches and soft kisses it makes life worth living for.

But then there's that look.

It can come at anytime. When you're helping her out of the car, holding the door open, helping with a mundane chore or as it happened last night, just before an innocent kiss. There could've been a hundred before it without anything happening, but last night there was. As I was leaning down her eyes looked into mine giving me the perfect view into her heart and soul. It told me 'I've fallen for you so hard, please don't break my heart.'

Oh no. This has to be the most difficult period in a relationship, when you know the other has made a decision you're still considering. Admittedly, there should be nothing wrong with you being allowed to think about this all-important decision. But just like waiting in line for a teller in a bank, you always wonder what the heck the person is doing in front of you and why is it taking so long?

How do I tell her I'm still counting my coins?

CLICK HERE to go to the front page of Lucky and Interesting Life blog!

Maybe my friend WAS right?

2005-02-17T07:11:00.000-05:00

So I went and saw the movie 'Hitch'. You may remember my friends persistence that I was living the life of Will Smith's character, only not selling the secret of seduction but living it.

Although I'll admit that there is a passing resemblance between his style, confidence and knowledge I can categorically and absolutely state two things. I wish I was as smooth as he was and I really, really wish it could be that easy. Actually one more thought would be that I really, really wish Eve Mendes could act, but this is a dating stories blog and not a movie review blog:)

Looking back though, maybe I shouldn't have taken a date to that movie. She did keep looking over at me suspiciously.

It is a movie with an awful lot of advice every guy can use. Listen to your date, look at her eyes and not her cleavage, keep just enough distance to let her come to you and never force the kiss.

Not only would I say this is a must see, this will definitely be making it into the DVD collection. Hidden of course.

It's official. I am a sick puppy.

2005-02-17T06:51:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty-One through Twenty-Three of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Are you ready for the oddest thought?

Remembering that I always seem to have at least three young ladies expecting a call at anytime and about that same number wanting to go out I always feel like I'm one step behind. It's a tough life I know.

What do you think is the easiest way to get away from the frantic pace of the dating world?

Spend a few days with your pseudo-girlfriend. A few thoughts before you think my other personalities have totally taken over.

I guess I really have to admit to myself that she is deeper in my heart than I've cared to acknowledge. If any other girl were to act anywhere near how she has, I wouldn't even be taking her phone calls let alone picking her up from the airport. Having said that, her and I do all the things you would consider as boyfriend/girlfriend but she never speaks of us as though we were. Hence the pseudo moniker.

It does have to be obvious though that she is my walking contradiction. As much a she's my 'feelgood' person, (you know just like you have 'feelgood' food that when you eat it you always feel good) it seems she can give just as much frustration.

Anyway, back to the point at hand. Dating can get a little crazy and just lately my port against this storm has been Miss PP. I disconnect from the rest of my world, being out of touch with any other love interests in my life at that time.

Its interesting that I don't even try to sneak dates in during our time together. But maybe that's because she is away so often I really don't have to if I want to play.

Our time together is cute with movies, meals, shopping and errands. These are the foundation for the fun, events and conversations that come about while doing them that makes the overlaying memories to be remembered and bring about the smiles.

The lazy breakfasts and inside jokes take me to a world of couplehood that it seems I'm only ever allowed to visit and haven't stayed over in such a long time.

Other emails and happenings?

Got a call from LL which fortunately rolled over to my voicemail since got the impression we were through and wanted to wish me luck. I had been putting off telling her I didn't think we were compatible, but thanks to caller ID and a little bit of time, she worked it out for herself!

Still didn't hear back from BB and part of me is actually happy about that. I didn't really see it going anywhere and although she had an eclectic personality as well as amazing body of course, it was definitely just a short term relationship.

In the same category of I will if I have to is MB's telephone number sitting on my desk. If any of my friends knew I had a perfectly good number and wasn't using it, they'd be so upset with me.

Will the person thats actually interested please stand up!

2005-02-15T23:49:00.000-05:00

Day Twenty of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

Went into work with an outlook that had improved over yesterday, which of course was sadly dismal the day before that. Once I got the work out of the way that I actually get paid for, I had the chance to make my ‘dating’ calls and first on the list was AA.

New Girl alert!!! A few voicemail exchanges later I was on the phone with her. I know from her online profile that she’s an exotic looking woman with jet-black hair and features as strong as her accent. Very pretty but she didn’t smile? Although the pictures were only of her face, the narrative of the ad had her figure as slim and sexy. Okay, so these weren't the exact words on the profile, but my optimistic nature was putting a positive spin on the stated facts. Leaving political correctness firmly to one side, it's always difficult to know how much of your perception of a person comes from their actual personality or from a trait such as an accent, twitch or even birth defect. This was the case of AA. Nothing she actually said conveyed directness but her thick foreign accent gave her conversation a definite abruptness and finality. Whereas I find the direct personality an immense turn-off, accents and most things exotic are an aphrodisiac, so throughout our conversation my libido didn’t know if it was coming or going.

She does have a young son but divorced from the father shortly after the baby was born. It was no shocker to find out that she hadn’t lived in this country too long, with the part of the world she's from having had some difficult times recently and religion playing in a large part of the problem. I started to wonder if growing up in this environment would go a long way to explaining her over-spilling dryness in both her attitude or humor that made the conversation feel like the Sahara. To be fair though, she did try, throwing in a lot of funny remarks but the unshifting tone left me unsure of how they were meant. It's hard to be smooth and suave when you're not sure whether to answer with serious understanding or a light-hearted chuckle. Life can be hard.

Regardless, it was obvious that we both enjoyed the call and were eagerly looking forward to getting together next week. As I hung up I was reminded of my friends always joking about me dating around the world. I smiled realizing that this would only feed the thought.

One of the main things on my to-do list was seeing BBO again, if anything simply for my ego to find out if there really was any attraction between the two of us, so it was a pleasant surprise when she called back today. This is the strange stage of not knowing if I want to see her because I genuinely like her, or if it’s simply the challenge. Make a note of that for the next therapy session (joke).

She was certainly cheerful and if she was upset about not hearing from me for three days after I got back into town from my business trip, it certainly didn't show in her voice. Although the conversation was very friendly and enjoyable, it was no more personal than what I would have with one of my customers. The feeling felt familiar and I eventually realized that I had the same impression I had at our lunch last week. It was what I like to refer to as 'conversation-lite' with none of the calories, less filling but also without the flavor. It was also lacking in depth and consequently was immediately forgettable. Not letting a small matter such as substance get in the way of a good date, I pressed on and suggested we meet over the weekend.

It has to be understood that it's not necessarily asking that will get the person to go out with you, but how and what you're asking her to do that’ll make her decide. If the young lady is of any caliber or quality you have to know you’re not the first guy to ever ask her out. So you need to stand out and this is as good time as any especially if you have any inspirations to becoming the potential new boyfriend. Trust me, I am by no means the master when it comes to this portion of the great play we call courting. As matter of fact, I've had people tell me that I'm far too nice to where it's perceived as unassertive or 'wimpy'. I can only hope that this is better than going to the other extreme of being so firm one comes across as some sort of ass.

With all the well intended effort and certainly thought out logic of asking BBO out, going to the Comedy Club ended up being the plan of action. Now it wasn’t that she couldn't go that was disappointing, but the fact that she didn’t try to find another night for us to get together. As with most things in life, it's not necessarily that you do something, but the enthusiasm in which it's done that matters.

There was something here between BBO and I, but either fate or the young lady herself was making it far too hard to find out what it was. I know whenever you hear the great love stories that bring on tears and take away breaths there are always great hurdles that were overcome. Hurdles are understandable, but someone who plays games or hard to get is just high maintenance and crazy!

As if the realization of this wasn’t enough to take the skip from your step, I remembered that I still hadn’t heard back from BB. Actually I wasn’t too disappointed since she’s not really that high on the list of want to see’s and after all who wants to seem desperate.

I'll leave it until tomorrow to call her again.

Must we believe EVERYTHING we see in movies?

2005-02-15T13:14:00.000-05:00

So it happened.

I knew it would from the very first preview I ever saw of the upcoming movie starring Will Smith. My friends who are either married or unwillingly single are too in awe of my world to let the movie 'Hitch' to go by without any sly grins or comparisons.

I was walking with a friend and also work colleague when he told me he saw 'my movie' last night.

"Hitch was you man." he said his grin growing bigger, " You ARE Hitch. The master."

I just shook my head as my friend repeated himself , playing with different versions of the same few sentences over and over. The more I denied it, the more emphatic he was. I had to change the subject.

"What are you doing for your girl on Valentines day?" I asked.

He became more serious. "We don't really celebrate it too much. I'm going to pick up pizza from our favorite pizza place on the way home."

"You ought to call ahead and get them to make it in the shape of a heart." I looked at him, "After all nothing says romance better than pepperoni's on a heart shaped pizza!" I was trying to make that last line sound as campy as I could.

"Hitch is you man. You ARE Hitch." He turned, chuckling to himself as he got in his car.

I hope this movie doesn't have too long of a run.

Cupid, pull back your bow.....

2005-02-15T13:02:00.000-05:00

If there were any official holidays bloggers were allowed to take off, Valentines Day would unquestionably be one for 'Lucky and Interesting Life'. Bearing in mind what this blog is about, it shouldn't be a great surprise that I was otherwise occupied and couldn't make an entry yesterday

What were the activities for Cupid's Day? Had three deliveries of roses made, two were eighteen and the third simply a dozen. I sent eighteen because not only does one have to be different but you can't compare the how much more impressed the recipient is with those extra six roses. I met a friend for lunch to wish her a happy valentines and maybe my imagination was running away slightly but I could've sworn we could've disappeared somewhere for a 'Nooner'.

The reason I didn't? After another certain young lady received her roses she called to thank me. This was nice enough, but during the conversation she invited herself over to my place tonight to thank me in person. Twist my arm! After the episode of the three women in one day (here, here and here), I've decided that maybe my energy should be used more wisely. That would be tonight.

What did I get from the Valentine Fairy? Cupid was nice enough to deliver a very nice box of hand painted chocolates, a stuffed bear and of course some cards. This doesn't include the flirting under the table at lunch and the company at my place for dinner, both of which make everything that was delivered pale in comparison.

Dinner was nice and informal. I ordered some food in and we actually nearly made it all the way through the meal before we found ourselves tearing off each other’s clothes in my bedroom.

It was about an hour and half later that while we lay there catching our breath she mentioned that she was worried we were becoming all about sex. While I'll admit that we were intimate right from our first date, I just thought it odd that it was brought up now on the night she came over to thank me for my thoughtfulness.

Once I assured her that we had so much more in common and enjoyed other things together she seemed much happier. Enough actually to make love for a little bit more before she had to go home.

All in all, a nice Valentines day!

Trying to get back on the horse

2005-02-13T22:51:00.000-05:00

Day Nineteen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

The re-done online dating profile was completed, pictures re-chosen and I just had to wait for everything to get approved by customer service. If you’ve never used a service before, it shouldn’t be surprising that the companies running the dating websites obviously don’t want nude pictures or offensive things said in the online ad’s, so changes are reviewed and published in about two days.

It was time to get ‘back in the saddle’. During the day I made all the calls I needed too, leaving BBO and BB messages. I knew the calls were later in the week than anyone expected them to be but the apathy from missing Miss PP was still a faint smell in the air. Indeed, I didn’t even feel the urge to call LL and pretty much had decided she was out of my life, I just hope she understood that as clearly.

Even though my online dating ads were being re-tooled there was still a little activity there.

Met a former professional cheerleader online and there was so much chemistry in the first few emails alone, we were talking on the phone within two hours of the first note being written. Although blondes are never my first choice, she seemed so cute and had so much spirit it in her emails it was if I was talking to her fourteen-year old daughter and not the forty two year old mother. When we finally got on the phone it was around 9.30 at night and things were moving along nicely, but there was something about her voice that made me wonder. I quickly pulled up her online profile and went down to the smoking preferences. There was this amour’s Achilles heel. She's a smoker. The dating service allows you to self-categorize yourself with one of four choices and this lady had chosen 'daily smoker'. Usually my searches screens for females who are listed as 'non' or 'occasional' smokers, and I couldn’t understand how she appeared on my list of matches. We were having such a great conversation I didn't have the heart to tell her I don't date smokers and used the late hour as a reason to get off the phone, promising to talk soon. I told myself that I’d send her a nice email explaining everything.

On another dating site I was surprised when a pretty forty two year old blonde, who appeared to be very professional and successful sent an amazing email. Since I overlooked the smoking on the former cheerleader, I made sure to double-check this profile. Everything looked great, a little too great. I went back to the email to see if I'd read the message correctly. There it was, teasing me with the same air of suspicion Charlie Brown surely felt every time Lucy offered to hold the football, 'You're so sexy I'd like to get to know you (signed)'.

Looking for the catch I again pulled up the profile and reread it. The most major difference of what we were both looking for, according to her own profile was the income bracket she preferred her potential partner to be in. It wasn't whether I met it or not, but more that it should be so high on her list of priorities. If I didn't feel comfortable about it now, what could possibly make the feeling any better down the road?

Then I realized. I was over-thinking this whole thing far too much and I replied figuring the whole mismatch would work itself out if we ever got to meet. With online dating, and especially her suspect enthusiasm, there’s a long race to run from the first email to the actual date.

And what better way to end the night than to get the telephone number of a very beautiful young lady. We had swapped a few emails and although she only had her face in the pictures on her profile, the description had her with a very nice figure. She certainly possessed a wonderful sense of humor and I was looking forward to hearing her voice when I called her in the morning.

As I fell asleep that night, it dawned on me that the aggressive email came from a blonde and the telephone number from an exotic looking brunette. I smiled at the thought of my very own ‘Lucky Guy’s Angels’.

Well hopefully not angels.

It's not about dates...it's about friends

2005-02-11T16:17:00.000-05:00

Day Eighteen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

When life and circumstances move the co-workers you grow so close too around or even away from your company, its nice when you can get together for a quick lunch and play catch-up. Today was one of those days where the food was good and the company was even better. Three of my colleagues and I put aside our busy schedules and ignored our appointment books for a long lunch just to chat and play catch-up. Everyone at the table was married, except for me of course and this meant the conversations came back to the never-ending stories of my dating life.

Each person’s interest seems to depend on whether they’re male or female. The men at the table wanted to hear tantalizing tales in order to live vicariously I’m sure, while the women’s intention was to talk me through my frustrations with the fairer sex and help me find that one ‘right person’. I’ll never forget how disappointed a supposedly good friend was when he found out I was moving in with a women and wouldn’t be dating a different person every other night. Married men want the single guys out there so they can come back with the stories full of dirty details and conquests.

As if I needed validation for my theory of why you shouldn't date at work, the loyal female colleague is argument enough. You will never have a stronger ally than the married female co-worker. She will tell you all the things that are wonderful about you, how shocking it is that you're unappreciated by single women and regardless none of them are worthy of you anyway. This cocooned world that is your workplace is the perfect sanctuary to fall into when the harsh realities of dating has dented your dignity.

At lunch it was agreed by all but myself that my sexual conquests had to be in the triple digits, which will get the same firm no comment now as it did at lunch, and aside from the lightness I made of the subject everyone agreed that my goal was a serious relationship. The other conclusions that my co-workers came to was that Miss PP needs to go, BBO is going to be a difficult person to date and I was the luckiest guy in the world to get the oversexed out of town girl.

The downside of spending time with my married friends is realizing just how much I’m missing in my life by not having that special someone. As frustrating as it can get going home and dealing with an upset spouse or even one that wants to talk when you really just want peace and quiet, at least there is someone to come home too.

That point can be easily lost on those who I consider to be the luckiest people on earth. Those who have someone they can truly say they love.

A Wink goes so much further sometimes...

2005-02-11T16:07:00.000-05:00

Day Eighteen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. (continued)

I had no sooner sat down at my desk after lunch when CL returned my call. She was a young lady with a shapely body that was as nearly amazing as her business drive. With her dark hair, exotic looks and breathtaking body she was someone I really wanted to meet. Although she’s at the lower range of my preferred age range, her teenage daughter has made her mature beyond her years. We'd spoken a few months ago and when the conversations trailed off I guessed someone had come along before we could set up a time to get together. One of the reasons I wasn't too heartbroken about ships passing in the Miami moonlit night was her abruptness. Although never rude or mean I could tell that the closest she ever came to warm and fuzzy would be her cashmere sweaters. Then I saw her online again and sent her a wink. After all, how could it hurt?

It seems I was right about some things and wrong about others.

I was right that she'd met someone just as we started speaking several months ago. As she told me about him I realized I was more wrong about who I thought she was than I was right when we first spoke months earlier. As I mentioned before, she was a young mother and incredibly successful in a very aggressive industry with definite ideas on what she wanted from life, both romantic and otherwise. Since she seemed so financially determined and just happened to live in a part of town where money was paramount, I was a little put off. But the gentleman she tried to date had a definite blue-collar job that didn't earn anywhere near what I thought she would want from a partner. I was amazed to learn that that she even tried to work through some challenges he had in his life. Could I've been this far off the mark?

The earliest we could get together was the next few days and even though Miss PP was back then I had a nagging suspicion that CL and I might be able to get together regardless. There's been an ominous feeling hanging over Miss PP and I that things were going to come to a head just lately. Our phone conversations are shorter and certainly more awkward. CL and I on the other hand were having a very pleasant conversation and I'm sure I could hear her sharing my thoughts at the other end of the line, 'This person is so cool, why didn't we meet last time?'

I promised to call her on in a few days and see where we both stood with our schedules all the while having mixed feelings inside about being able to meet the same time Miss PP was in town. It was just sad.

To MB or NOT to MB

2005-02-11T15:55:00.000-05:00

Day Eighteen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. (continued)

My offices are located in a typical office building with the restrooms located outside our offices in the hallway. Interestingly enough the men’s restroom is to one side of a busy set of elevators on the ground floor and the ladies on the other. A lot of people seem to work in our building and it feels like you can see whole world go in and out of those elevators. The advantage to all this traffic, which comes from smoke breaks to shift changes is that you can meet an awfully lot of interesting people. The downside would be that all the great looking people know you're going to the bathroom and at what frequency.

It was on one of these breaks I met a young lady who worked for a different division of the last company I worked for. We had flirted a little at various corporate events, award presentations and holiday parties. But we were both dealing with our own relationship issues at the time and nothing ever came of the lingering looks and different happy hours.

She stood at 5’6” and wasn‘t beautiful but certainly pretty. Her blond hair would always be slightly wild and crazy giving her a much more attractive look than she would’ve had otherwise. Although never fat she had obviously lost some weight and whether it was the flattery from her obvious excitement to see me, or just the timing of her appearing in a confused time in my life but it was really nice to see her.

MB seemed clumsily excited to bump into me and as she fumbled around the conversation about being happy that we met again, I noticed she was thinner and just looked healthier. In a less than subtle fashion she asked about my love life and seemed so pleased to hear I was single she interrupted my answer to tell me that she'd broken up with her boyfriend. We spoke and flirted all the way until the chime of the elevator arriving on our floor told us our time was up. The conversation carried on until the doors shut it off and I walked away with a smile.

To whomever was looking out for me, thank you for that ego boost and pleasant new opportunity.

And he scratches his head...

2005-02-07T01:03:00.000-05:00

Day Seventeen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

You only have to look to the great people in history to realize that life cannot be lived at the fastest pace you can muster. While never daring to associate myself with the legends that flew too close to the sun, I have come to realize that lulls are a necessity to not only to longevity but also your sanity. Is it common sense understanding that dating has it’s ebbs and flows or maybe a healthy humbleness that you can’t be all things to all people for anywhere near all of the time?

It’s not to say that a slight panic doesn’t set in when fate throws the train of love off the tracks by hitting the emergency brake. By the time you get back on your feet, you're amazed to find all the adoring females are no longer anywhere to be found.

Since I’d been checking my email with my cellphone on the way from my romantic getaway, I was a little prepared about the lack of activity from the online dating sites. The trend was continuing again today and in a calm manner I was systematically going through the possible reasons this source of dates had dried up. Maybe it was because I'd tried to be too cute and changed the main description, or was it the new photos I posted? Don’t ask what came over me, but after all these years of the same look, I’d changed my haircut to a new popular style that was suggested by three different young ladies on separate unsolicited occasions. Since the style hasn’t worked exactly like I’d hoped it would, I wasn't sure what’s going on with my ‘look’.

Like a technician of love I troubleshot where I was and why it was happening.

Until I work out the new Lucky Guy there’s really no point of changing the pictures again so I just rewrote the description on the various online ads of who I am and what I’m looking for in a girl in a more straightforward manner.

I was supposed to call LL today as well as two other ladies I’d gotten back in touch with using flirts on the dating sites, but wasn’t really in the mood. There were the usual confused feelings that I seem to have everytime I leave Miss PP. Never being totally happy with all of our time together and certainly not the emotionless goodbyes, but for some reason I still miss her.

The phone was unusually quiet but the silence was certainly welcomed.

Prelude to a Romantic Getaway

2005-02-05T13:28:00.000-05:00

Day Thirteen through Sixteen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it.

It's probably not gone unnoticed that everything written here is purposefully kept vague and the exact details slightly off. This is done to not only save the embarrassment of anyone included in the various adventures, but also to keep me from getting threatening or obscene phone calls in the middle night. There is a set of self-imposed guidelines featured in one of the very first posts to this blog and gives a good idea of what to expect to see here. After all I would hate to mislead or disappoint anyone!

Now, while most stories can follow in this line of thinking and still be told in all their glory, Day's thirteen through sixteen of looking for love or something vaguely resembling it took place on a 'romantic getaway'. Here’s my predicament. How do I make the stories ambiguous enough Miss PP's friends and family won't recognize themselves, or worse case her, but still keep it fun and amusing to write about? The story sounds more like a review of someone in a witness protection plan than a review of a romantic vacation, but it is what is it.

Just a thought. Romantic getaways...

2005-02-05T13:21:00.000-05:00

Day Thirteen through Sixteen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. (continued)

Before we get to the actual tale of our time spent together, the romantic getaway itself is a strange animal. This beast usually happens over a long weekend and is generally taken by a couple still young in their relationship. In a way, the ‘romantic getaway’ can be read as a half commitment by both parties. You’re more or less saying to the other person that you like them enough to go away, but not enough to be together for an entire vacation. This is why long-term couples opt for the full-fledged vacation over the romantic getaway. They’re committed to each other and it’s no secret from anyone especially themselves, so if the effort’s going to be made to get away then lets go the whole nine yards and make it a vacation. The only time long-term couples tend to take the ‘quickies’ is when there is something specifically to do somewhere but it’s not really long enough to warrant a whole week.

Even referring to it as a mini-vacation infers that we’re a couple but not that serious of a couple, although we could well be by the time we get back. But don’t hold me to that. When a couple in the early stages of a relationship decides to take one of these trips they’re not going for the antiquing, national parks or any natural view except that of nakedness. Admittedly, there’s a genuine curiosity to see if this relationship is strong enough to go to the next level, as is so wonderfully shown on an early episode of Seinfeld. But at the end of the day, good, raunchy, and more importantly uninterrupted sex is the primary goal of the trip. How many couples broke up prematurely from the pressure cooker of relationships because someone still lived at home or they had a nosey roommate and the trip was taken sooner that it should’ve? To further prove the point the trips main focus is carnal satisfaction; ask yourself how many of these trips are taken when the lady ‘has a visitor’?

So timing is the most difficult of choices, since too early and it can kill the relationship and too far into it and your other half could take it as an insult that they’re not good enough to spend more time with on a full vacation.

Unfortunately, this is a matter that’ll never be fully understood. After all, the people who survive them are so in love they probably could go to a Club Med in Somalia and come back with ten hours of vacation video. The ones who didn’t make it will never know if it was the person or the dreaded ‘romantic getaway’ that obviously wasn’t so romantic!

Finally....the Romantic Getaway

2005-02-05T13:06:00.000-05:00

Day Thirteen through Sixteen of the search for Eternal True Love or something vaguely resembling it. (continued)

We had planned our getaway some weeks in advance, and maybe it was over a weekend, or maybe it wasn’t! I can tell you that by the time I stepped off the plane, Miss PP and I hadn’t seen each other for about a week, so whether it was from missing her or just the joy of getting out of my routine, but the whole time was incredibly relaxing and comfortably enjoyable. In a way this can be used to describe our relationship.

Actually, using a vacation as an analogy is a perfect way to sum up what we seem to have. There are no overly exciting times from rock climbing or heated moments felt from fire walking. We're on a steady cruise through a pleasant part of the world with the only entertainment being shuffleboard, ballroom dancing or laying out on the deck. To carry on with this example, many people would be happy to be included on the cruise and I guess I should decide if I want to be on the passenger list or not. It doesn't help that I spent many years on one of these excursions in a previous relationship and know deep in my heart that though I never jumped ship, the inclination to do so was only one more waltz away. By the very fact I'm single today, I obviously asked the ship to pull into port so I could get off.

Although we hadn't seen each other for about a week, we didn’t make love the first night for a few reasons. First and foremost the geography of our room where we were staying for the next two nights was such that I was sure others would hear us, or I should say her! Also, I’d come to the resolution on the flight out that I wouldn’t start the foreplay, but wait to see if she missed me enough, or was sexual frustrated enough to want to be together. Whether she felt the same way about the room situation or she really didn’t feel the urge but we just fell asleep and I’ll never know the reason why since it’s impossible to talk to her about these things. That is unless you enjoy silence and confused looks as answers.

The time was spent getting know family and friends as well as playing the tourist around the town and outlying areas. We all decided to go out for dinner and drinks on the second night and when all was said and done we had a fairly large crowd. Because everyone had let me into their lives and took time out of the weekend to show us around town, I paid for our first, and rather large bar tab out of appreciation. Although I didn’t do it for Miss PP to fawn over me in adulation, a quick kiss of thanks or even a hug and comment would’ve been nice but needless to say I got neither. The rest of the group seemed to appreciate it though and we celebrated by finding another bar and having even more drinks.

With all the alcohol I was more than happy to get back to the room to sleep, and it seemed to be a popular idea with everyone bunking wherever they could find a place. Fate was laying it out plain and clear. There was nothing happening in any way in any fashion.

As per our great getaway plan we drove to another part of the state the next day to see some sights and meet some more of her friends, enjoying probably the best part of our relationship. Just being together. Miss PP is very smart and well read both classically and on current events. Of course it helps that we have the same political leanings, but the conversation during the drive was funny and felt really natural in the way it flowed.

When we arrived she showed her sweet side insisting I take my time to walk around one of the world famous landmarks that she’d visited half a dozen times before. It was times like this as I stood in the place I’d seen in so many movies and TV shows that I wondered why we didn’t click on all cylinders and have one of those whirlwind romances that you wish for. Rhett and Scarlett, Mark and Cleopatra, Brad and Jen (oops sorry). Why couldn’t Lucky Guy and Miss PP be added?

We met up with her friends and did the town leaving enough to time and staying sober enough to find our hotel on the other side of the city. We booked it closer to the airport for my flight in the morning and it was also conveniently located for her business appointments over the next few days. I’m not sure if Miss PP was planning on sleeping off the alcohol when we got up to our room or not, but I had plans for tonight! As I’ve said many times before and I won’t beat the point to death again, but I can see, feel and certainly hear that she enjoys making love so why doesn’t she ever want to start it? It’s a little like having a steak at one of the cheaper steakhouses, or even a restaurant chain that has it on the menu for the meat lovers. It looks good, when it comes to you on your plate it looks good with all the right things, sizzling, grill marks and the plastic sign stuck in the top showing it was cooked precisely to your preference. But about half way through eating it, you know you’ve had better and truly wonder if it’s really worth finishing.

Since I hadn’t eaten steak for about a week and this particular cut wouldn’t be on my menu for another week, I did decide to finish the meal put in front of me. Like every full meal I was ready to lay down and sleep when I was finished and I got to do it with my little Miss PP.

Out of State, but Online!
In case you thought by being on the road, my online dating activity would have to stop, I do have the ability to check email on my cellphone. Even though technology gave me the gift of knowing there were people interested, it was so difficult to tap out the replies I had to wait until I got home to a computer. Life can be so cruel don't you think?

So who was writing? A young lady with a shapely body that was as amazing as her business drive. We'd spoken a few months and when the conversations trailed off I guessed someone had come along before we could meet. Although she’s at the lower range of my preferred age range, her teenage daughter has made her mature beyond her years. One of the reasons I wasn't too heartbroken about ships passing in the Miami moonlit night was her abruptness. Although never rude or mean I could tell that the closest she ever came to warm and fuzzy would be her cashmere sweaters.

Another young lady who wrote lives a little further than I prefer but she seems incredibly flirty, fun and very cute. Both of them left their telephone numbers and it was agonizing since the way my flights fell I'd have to wait until the morning after I get back.

With what had happened on this trip and the attention I already had waiting back home for me from LL and BBO as well as the others who had emailed, it was a trip full of concern and confusion.